Same Love
by subcutaneous
Summary: Twenty years after Voyager returns to Earth, Admiral Janeway and Seven Hansen must put aside their differences to help save the life of an old friend.
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note: So many years later, this show is still inspiring me in new ways. Thank you, as always, to the writers, actors and characters I continue to adore, and for all of your inspiration. Thank you to my beautiful love, who also inspires and keeps me writing. This story takes place twenty years after Voyager returns to Earth and is set in the universe of the show, following "Endgame." It is exactly what I wished would have happened given the way the show ended. I have played around with some technology/time issues, so hope hardcore science people will forgive me. Other than that, it is, I believe, very much true to our beloved show. Thanks for reading, and I look forward to your comments. Enjoy

**CHAPTER ONE**

Kathryn Janeway sat at her desk, gazing out over the San Francisco Bay. She had a habit of getting lost in this position for hours, intending on completing some project or starting on the next, only to find herself much more content doing nothing. Deadlines had become meaningless since she'd retired from active command six months ago. Then again, they hadn't held much urgency since returning from the Delta Quadrant. It almost felt like the two decades she'd been back on Earth were borrowed time. After fighting every moment, every day to make it home safely, she hated to rush.

She caught a glimpse of her reflection in the window, and as always, was a bit startled to see the woman staring back. The years had weathered Kathryn, partly from the hectic schedule she was forced to keep despite her attempts to disengage, but more so from the tendency to bury her feelings in a nice Irish whiskey. She continued to dye her hair a red, but it never came close to the soft auburn hue of her younger days. Part of her knew it looked ridiculous, and yet she refused to stop, mostly because she feared becoming the stubborn old woman she'd met on Voyager in the days before their return to Earth.

The Admiral, while incredibly strong and brilliant, had indeed perished in the final battle with the Borg Queen. Although Janeway had taken the title herself in the years since, she never liked it, couldn't get used to it, and actually preferred people call her Kathryn. Perhaps the red hair was meant to stave off the mortality she had faced in order to save another.

As for the woman she'd risked everything to save…well. Sometimes Kathryn figured she may as well have died too.

She cursed herself for thinking it, but distance lead to callous, and if she were willing to be totally honest, regret.

"Come in," she sighed lazily as the door to her home office chimed.

Cadet Lira Stevenson-who had been assigned to work with Janeway as part of her Starfleet coursework-entered the room and sat across from the desk. They both knew Starfleet gave Kathryn an assistant more as a formality than anything else. She'd taken herself off most committees and research teams. Occasionally, she'd do a guest lecture at the Academy, maybe attend an informal gathering here and there, but other than that, Lira's job was to help sort through the incessant invitations she continued to receive. Nevertheless, they got along well, and Kathryn didn't mind the company.

"Anything interesting?" Kathryn asked, spinning her chair around to face the young woman.

"Admiral Jones is hosting a consortium on Holodeck expansion next Thursday," Lira noted, scanning through the pad in her hand. She wasn't surprised to hear Janeway scoff, knowing that meant to hit the delete button.

"There's a forum on reptilian species at the Academy in December, if..."

"I plan on staying in Indiana from Thanksgiving till New Years," Kathryn cut her off, a little impatient, though Lira knew it wasn't personal. "Anything else?"

Lira looked at her softly before beginning again.

"Doctor Zimmerman sent another message."

"For God's sake, how many times do I have to tell the man I'm retired?"

"I know... but I think you better read this one."

Something in Lira's voice made Janeway pause.

For eighteen years, she had never failed to miss the Doctor's annual "Medical Marvels of the Delta Quadrant" conference, either serving as a guest speaker or simply attending out of loyalty and respect for her former crewmember and dear friend. She knew how important the discoveries they'd made aboard Voyager were to the medical community, what gifts they had brought back to the rest of the world, all largely thanks to the incredible and sometimes unconventional methods of the most honored and decorated EMH in Starfleet history.

However, beginning the year prior, the conference had been reduced from three days to one day, largely due to funding cuts, though from what she understood it was still standing room only. Despite the Doctor's persistent attempts to have her attend, she'd said no, but not because she couldn't make the date.

A one day conference meant having to run into the only crewmember she had purposely avoided in the twenty years they'd returned to Earth. She always asked to see the conference schedule first before agreeing on a date. If Seven's presentation was already on the agenda, she'd choose one of the other two days. If Seven was not yet listed in the program, she'd choose a date first, only to find later that the former Borg had scheduled herself the day before or the day after. Any time the Doctor asked for them to appear together, both made excuses until he eventually stopped asking. It was an unspoken yet understood arrangement, and since Seven lived in New Mexico, their paths never crossed.

Janeway took a deep breath as Lira handed her the pad. She looked down and began to read.

_Greetings Beloved and Distinguished Colleagues,_

_As many of you know, my wife and partner, Dr. Jennifer Zimmerman, has been ill for some time. After examining every medical advancement in the known universe together, our greatest challenge and the most tragic discovery we've had to face is that sometimes a breakthrough is not reached in time to save every patient. While the research we conducted on Jennifer's condition will no doubt lead to a cure in the future, she lost her battle with the illness this week. _

_Nevertheless, at her insistence and in lieu of a memorial, I have agreed to continue on with our annual conference as planned, though it will be my final year leading the proceedings. After the event, I plan to transfer all of my findings to Starfleet Academy in order to provide the capable students there with the opportunity to continue these endeavors. After a brief visit with our son on Chaya VII, I will then delete my program permanently. I know this may sound rash, but I have given it considerable thought and hope that those of you with biology that privileges your ability to die naturally will understand and respect my need to bring my own life to a conclusion with dignity. _

_I hope to see all of you (and I do mean all of you) at the conference in two weeks. I know for some, the considerations you will need to make in order to be there will be arduous, but I do hope you will make the trip so that I may thank you for the support and friendship you've so lovingly shared with me over the years, and to once more, say goodbye._

_Sincerely,_

_Doctor Joe Zimmerman_

Kathryn could not stop the tears. She hated to cry in front of Lira, but simply couldn't stop them. Jennifer was a lovely woman. She'd gotten to know her over the years, both at conferences and during the weekends she'd been invited to spend with the couple at their home. She didn't know much about the mysterious and fatal illness Jennifer had suffered, only that it had become completely debilitating in the past year, and that the Doctor had done everything in his power to try to save her.

"Are you..."

"I'm fine," Kathryn sniffed, wiping away her tears. "She will be missed."

"So...you're going then?" Lira asked a little sheepishly.

Kathryn let out a deep sigh and brought her fingers to her temples. It was too much to process at once.

"I need to think," she breathed.

"I'll have to book the transporter time soon," Lira said, a little more firmly.

"I know."

Kathryn brought her elbows onto the desk and rested her chin in her hands. She felt incredibly guilty for thinking so selfishly. She had to be there. The Doctor was very important to her, even if she hadn't seen him as much in the past few years. Part of her wondered at the dramatics of his plan, whether or not he'd actually go through with it. Overcome with grief, it was no shock he'd consider ending his life. She'd known many flesh and blood people who had been through the same. He had worked so hard at becoming as human as possible, and these were typical human emotions that needed to be processed. Surely with time and the support of his friends he would change his mind, but that meant needing his closest friends near him, which meant she had to be there.

"I'm sorry, Admiral," Lira offered.

"Thank you," Kathryn half-smiled, snapping back from her thoughts.

"Maybe it's not my place to say, but I think that if you don't decide now, you'll keep debating until it's almost too late and get yourself so worked up it will be even harder when the time comes."

Kathryn chuckled lightly. Lira knew her too well for the short time they'd been working together.

"You're right. It's not your place to say, but I like that you did anyway."

Lira smiled.

"I'll make the arrangements then. Is there anything else I can do?"

Kathryn shook her head no. Lira stood and began to leave.

"Cadet Stevenson," Kathryn stopped her.

The young woman turned and waited for further instructions.

Kathryn wasn't sure how Lira knew it would be such a difficult decision. Her friend's wife was dead. Of course she should go.

Then again, anyone who even remotely kept tabs on the Voyager saga, anyone who read her book (which she knew Lira had) would question why Janeway was never seen with the Borg she'd famously rescued during their journey. Reporters asked about Seven frequently through the years, and she always gave a similar canned response. _Yes, she was an incredible asset to the entire crew. Yes, of course there were challenges._ _No, they did not keep_ _in touch. _

Besides the technical details, the only other response she gave to further inquiries was "no comment."

"Nothing," Kathryn replied to Lira, shaking her head.

The young woman nodded and left Kathryn alone with her thoughts. Spinning her chair back towards the window, she resumed her watch over the Bay.


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER TWO**

Kathryn arrived on the transporter deck at Boston's historic South Station after a rather uneventful trip. Lira helped her pack a small suitcase, which was not at all part of her job description, but unsurprising given Kathryn had avoided it until that morning.

After checking in at the hotel in Copley Square, she made her way to Hynes Convention Center, another historic landmark which had been renovated in the generations since its creation in the 21st century. She chose to walk whenever visiting Boston, meandering through the streets of Back Bay with an old map she'd replicated. It was one of North America's most ancient cities, and it had always been a hub for medical research, which was why the Doctor chose to work there. The subway system had long become obsolete after the invention of transporters, but for a city that continued to buzz, slowing it down and doing things the old fashioned way felt much more fitting.

Upon entering the grand hall, she was immediately greeted by several attendees eager to have her sign a copy of her book and answer questions about this being the Doctor's last conference. She smiled for a few photographers and proceeded to make her way through the maze of tables to the front of the room, where she found some familiar faces.

"Admiral!" Harry Kim greeted her, throwing his arms around her shoulders and squeezing tightly. It had been several years since they'd seen each other, though she had written him a recommendation for his promotion to Captain in May. "I wasn't sure you'd make it!"

"How could I not?" she tried not to choke as he finally eased his grip. All of the shyness of the young Ensign who once served in her ranks had dissipated, leaving behind a very competent and successful man.

"Can I get you anything?" he still offered.

"Well, you know me," she replied. "Coffee, black. If you don't mind."

"Not at all," he smiled, squeezing her shoulder before venturing off on his mission.

"I also had my doubts that you would make an appearance," said Commander Tuvok, who had retired that year as well. He received his old friend's embrace and the kiss she planted on his cheek with only the slightest blush.

"You know we all had to be here," Kathryn whispered gravely.

"I concur," he nodded. "The message was sent to only a small group of his closest colleagues. However, I think someone must have tipped off the media. They are asking questions I, for one, am not prepared to answer."

"Nor am I," she agreed. "Where is our host, anyway?"

"Backstage. According to the program, he will not be speaking until later in the day. His assistants will oversee the morning panel and activities."

"Great," she rolled her eyes. "I shouldn't complain. I just don't know if I can sit through hours upon hours of presentations. I'd rather pull him aside now and try to smack some sense into that bald head of his. After offering my condolences, of course."

The two sat down as Harry returned, and they were soon greeted by B' Elanna, Tom and Miral. The pleasantries continued to be exchanged until Kathryn counted the seats around the table and noticed only one was left. The placeholder read "S. Hansen."

"Is Chakotay not coming?" she whispered, leaning towards Tuvok.

"He has been on an extended research expedition and vision quest for the past three years in Central America. I believe the term is 'off the grid.'"

Kathryn raised an eyebrow.

"Surely Ms. Hansen knows how to get a hold of him."

Tuvok hesitated to respond, taking a slow sip of tea before continuing.

"I do not believe they are in communication as of late."

"Oh," Kathryn responded, rather shocked, but keeping her composure. "As of...how late?"

"Perhaps you should ask her yourself when she arrives, which should be any minute given the program is about the start."

He shot her a glance she hadn't received in ages, that knowing look, the one that meant he disagreed with her about something, but his Vulcan ethics prevented him from getting further involved.

She looked around the room and did not see any sign of Seven- who still went by Seven, though she had adopted her human surname.

"Good morning," Dr. Arnold Helsnik, one of the Doctor's assistants, greeted everyone at the mic. "On behalf of Doctor Joe Zimmerman, along with the entire Medical Marvels of the Delta Quadrant Committee, we welcome you to our twentieth anniversary conference."

The applause was long and heartfelt, even as people continued to take their seats.

"Before we begin, I'd like to ask all of us to share a brief moment of silence to honor the late Dr. Jennifer Zimmerman, without whom we would not be here together today. We are only beginning to come to terms with the loss of her presence among the Starfleet medical community, and we know that more than anything, her final wish was for the great progress we have made over the past two decades to continue in her memory."

Everyone bowed their heads, a strange sight in a room full of mostly secularists, but the tradition seemed to be the only proper way to honor Jennifer.

Dr. Helsnik continued with the overview of the morning's agenda, followed by a panel summarizing the year's top ten advances in diagnostic tools, a presentation on Vidiian phage antibodies, and a forum on the orthopedic implications of the anthromorphology of Species 8472. Kathryn found it all relatively fascinating, considering she and her crew were the only people who had actually met most of the species discussed. Nevertheless, nostalgia eventually gave way to boredom. She tried not to fidget, knowing that many eyes were fixed on her, endlessly intrigued by her reactions to the findings.

Just as her eyelids began to droop, she felt the energy in the room shift as people's heads turned toward the entrance. The hair on the back of her neck stood, a reaction that surprised her, but nevertheless seemed appropriate. She knew Seven had arrived, but refused to look until she saw Harry stand and pull out the empty chair next to him. Only then did she realize she'd been holding her breath for nearly thirty seconds, and exhaled slowly as she tried to nonchalantly glance across the table.

Every muscle in her body tensed as she took in the vision of the woman sitting across from her.

Seven had always been stunning, but Kathryn had not been prepared for the extra layers of beauty the years seemed to have bestowed upon her. Her long, blonde hair fell effortlessly around her shoulders in waves, a far cry from the tight updo she'd sported daily on Voyager. Her skin remained flawless even though she had to be in her mid-forties. She wore very little makeup, but clearly didn't need it, and the ease with which she greeted those around her, offering quiet apologies for being late, made Kathryn feel as if she had entered an alternate universe. Despite the circumstances, she couldn't stop the tiniest spark of pride from welling up within.

Seven's royal blue, modest but tight-fitting wrap dress was almost Bohemian, topped off with a vibrant string of silver and turquoise beads typical of the jewelry found in the American Southwest. It looked vintage, perhaps an heirloom from some distant relative, or one of Chakotay's ancestors.

Kathryn swallowed. Thankfully, the presentation had not quite wrapped up, so she was able to bring her attention back to the stage and gather her thoughts as best she could. The last time she'd spoken to Seven was in her ready room a little over twenty years ago. After all this time, she still remembered every word.

Once again, her thoughts were interrupted as the room broke out in applause and the first part of the day's events drew to a close. It was now time for lunch.

"I thought something happened," B'Elanna admonished. "You're never late."

Seven appeared a bit flustered.

"The transporters in Santa Fe malfunctioned for the third time this week," the blonde responded, clearly annoyed. "Otherwise, I would have been early."

"It's alright," Harry assured her. "None of us have even seen the Doc yet."

Seven nodded.

"Nevertheless, I apologize for my absence from this morning's portion of the program. Commander Tuvok, I expect you will be able to provide me with sufficient summaries on the presentations I missed?"

"Certainly," he replied.

"Miral, tell Seven about the last time you took a transporter from Madrid to El Paso," Tom nudged.

As Miral began to share her transportation woes, Kathryn continued to watch Seven, who seemed very engaged in the conversation and clearly was not making any effort to look in her direction.

"The technology's outdated," Tom interjected again. "It's time for an upgrade."

"To what?" B'Elanna snorted. "Are we just going to snap our fingers? Like the Q?"

"I don't think I like that idea," Kathryn finally spoke. "Unannounced visits are bad enough when it's an omnipotent being imposing himself in your personal space. I'd hate to give my mother that kind of power."

Everyone laughed, except Seven, though the blonde did finally bring her attention to her former Captain. As the two locked eyes, silence fell around the table.

"Admiral," Seven finally greeted her, suddenly sounding much more like the ex-Borg Kathryn remembered.

"Seven," Kathryn replied, as polite as could be, though her heart was beating faster than a slipstream drive. "Or shall I say... Ensign? Lieutenant?"

Seven's face remained relatively emotionless. Everyone at the table was transfixed.

"As I chose not to pursue studies at the Academy, my designation remains the same."

"Ah, that's right," Kathryn feigned forgetfulness. "Though I thought surely after all the independent research you've contributed to the field, Starfleet no doubt would have given you an honorary rank."

Seven breathed through her nose steadily, taking her time to respond.

"They have not," she replied. "However, I would find such an action irrelevant considering the incredibly low level of credence I give to rank."

A warp core could have breached and none of the people sitting around the table would have budged.

"I see," Kathryn raised her coffee mug to her lips. "Then I suppose it's just as well."

The silence continued as the waitstaff placed their meals in front of them. Slowly, they picked up their forks and began to eat.

"Good afternoon, Voyager family!" The Doctor finally greeted them.

Everyone stood and took their turn embracing the EMH, genuinely touched by the anguish he had suffered, but the Doc seemed to be in good spirits. Kathryn watched as Seven took his hands in her own and planted a very generous kiss on his cheek, though she tuned out to what they were saying as she tried to figure out what words of solace she herself would offer.

"Admiral," the Doctor approached her at last, clearly doing his best to keep his composure.

"You know better than that," she whispered.

"Kathryn," he nodded, his voice threatening to break as he hugged her, resting his chin on her shoulder.

"I'm so sorry my friend," she spoke into his ear. "I don't know what else to say."

"You're here," he assured her. "That says more than enough."

She nodded.

"Did you get my message about dinner?" he continued to whisper.

"Yes. Tonight, you and me. It will be good to catch up and talk about...everything."

"Indeed," he smiled hesitantly before turning back to the rest of the group. "I'm afraid I must return to my duties behind the scenes, but I look forward to visiting with each of you this evening at the cocktail reception."

After he left, they hardly felt like finishing their lunch.

"Are we just going to let him go through with it?" B'Elanna finally broke the silence.

"This is hardly the time for that conversation," Tuvok warned, looking over his shoulder for looming reporters. "We are part of a privileged group he chose to tell."

"He won't do it," Harry shook his head, ignoring Tuvok. "I mean...he's just... he won't. Right?"

"Someone needs to talk to him," Tom said. "Admiral?"

"Tuvok's right," she agreed. "This is not the time. But I do plan to speak with him and I wouldn't worry."

That seemed to put them at ease for the moment. All except one.

"Worry is irrelevant," Seven chimed in. "It is his choice."

Kathryn was caught off guard by the remark.

"I suppose that's true," she spoke quietly. "Though how are we to determine whether his choice is being made of sound mind?"

"It is not our place to make that judgement," Seven insisted.

_Here we go_, Kathryn thought.

"Really?" the Admiral scoffed. "Because I can think of a number of times when others at this very table were the thankful recipients of a much needed intervention to stop them from making a terrible mistake."

Seven raised her chin defiantly. Suddenly Kathryn felt like they were back in her ready room.

"Perhaps your memories are flawed."

"Okay," B'Elanna interrupted loudly. "A discussion for another time. Right, Tuvok?"

"I have given my opinion," Tuvok replied. "Whether or not it is taken is out of my control."

"Well, I for one could use another cup of coffee!" Harry exclaimed. "Care to join me, Admiral?"

Janeway held her scowl for another moment before brushing off the conversation and following Harry to the replicator.

"That didn't take long," B'Elanna groaned, eyeing Seven.

Seven's nostrils flared. She took a deep breath before ignoring B'Elanna and returning her attention to her salad.

"The eternal mystery," Tom continued to jab playfully at the blonde. "I guess we'll never know exactly what..."

"Tom," B'Elanna scolded.

"Sorry," he offered.

Seven gave him a piercing look with her crystal blue eyes before melting back into a much more relaxed smirk.

"I'm glad you're here," B'Elanna squeezed Seven's shoulder.

Seven swallowed hard.

"For the Doctor," she began solemnly, "I would do anything."

B'Elanna smiled back sadly, and they finished their lunch in silence before the afternoon program began.


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER THREE**

The rest of the day was very emotional as the Doctor took to the stage to discuss the final days of Jennifer's battle with the rare degenerative disease. The details were grim, and clearly difficult for the Doc to relive and describe, but with the help of his assistants they were able to get through it. Finally, he announced that he would no longer be working on the project to find a cure and would transfer all of his responsibilities, including running the conference, to Dr. Helsnik and an eager team of Starfleet students. He did not, however, share the plan to delete his program.

By the time the presentations were over and the cocktail hour began, most of the former Voyager crew were fading fast, exhausted from having to be "on" in front of reporters and other overzealous attendees who wanted nothing more than a few moments with a Voyager veteran. Eventually, the Doctor joined the festivities and was able to share some quality time with Tuvok, Harry, Tom, B'Elanna, and Miral before they said their goodbyes and headed back to the hotel.

Kathryn spent most of the evening catching up with Admiral Stark, who served with her on the committee to review interspecies relations in the years following Voyager's return. They'd had some heated debates between them considering Janeway's increasingly lax approach to the Prime Directive, but were ultimately able to put their differences aside to create a much more reasonable set of standards for deep space travel. He was also quite the aficionado on old world liquors, and Kathryn helped herself to his suggestions as they sat together holding court.

After Stark made his exit and others began bidding their farewells, Kathryn stepped out onto the terrace, desperate for some fresh air before her dinner with the Doctor. As she took in the bustling noises of the traffic below, she realized she was not alone. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Seven at the other end of the terrace, leaning against the balcony by herself, her hair only slightly tousled by the wind. She wondered if after all these years, the former drone still hadn't adapted to "frivolous" socializing.

After taking a long, contemplative sip from her glass, she made her approach.

"You haven't changed a bit, I see," Kathryn whispered as she sidled up next to Seven, drink still in hand. "I don't blame you, especially with this crowd. They're so eager to barrage you with questions you've answered a thousand times."

Seven glanced at her former Captain briefly before returning her gaze to the Boston skyline.

"It is tedious," she responded hesitantly before sipping from her own martini glass.

"What's that?" Kathryn motioned towards the drink. "I thought you and alcohol didn't agree."

Seven rolled her eyes.

"It is a mixture of water and grenadine."

Kathryn smirked, amused.

"Any good?"

Seven sighed.

"No," she responded. "But is preferable to having to repeatedly refuse the offer to buy me a drink."

Janeway couldn't help but laugh.

"So you have learned to play the game when necessary."

Seven did not respond. Minutes seemed to pass as they stood incredibly still and silent.

"You look great," Janeway finally offered, shocked at herself for being so informal, but she was on her third Jameson. "No older than the day you left the Collective."

Seven swallowed.

"I assure you that is incorrect."

"What? I don't see any wrinkles, no gray hair from what I can tell. Must be those lingering nanoprobes," Kathryn blurted awkwardly before gesturing towards her own hair. "As you can see, I try my best."

Seven couldn't hide her discomfort.

"I believe aging naturally is preferable to using synthetics to prolong youth."

Kathryn's mouth snapped shut. She breathed through her nose, not unlike a dragon, her cheeks turning red.

"Says the ex-Borg," she seethed raspily. "Or have you given up entirely on the quest for 'perfection'?"

Seven slowly cocked her head to the side as if to scrutinize her former Captain more closely, a move Janeway remembered all too well. The older woman stood her ground, though she shifted a little as Seven's gaze turned pensive, almost as if she were perusing one of Maestro Da Vinci's sculptures back on the Holodeck.

"I have."

"Really?" Kathryn snorted. "Coming from you, that seems rather jaded."

Seven shrugged.

"Perfection is an illusion. It requires distancing one's self from reality, from what makes us unique. As a human, I have learned there are many things that do not require enhancement. They simply are, in their essence, perfect."

Now it was Kathryn's turn to swallow.

"Well," she breathed.

"I must go," Seven said quickly, discarding her glass on a nearby table. "I have a meeting at 2100 hours."

"As do I," Kathryn straightened herself out, smoothing her black frock before moving towards the door. She arrived there first, and was about to hold it open for Seven, but paused, leaning against it and looking back at the blonde once more. Seven visibly swallowed.

"Maybe someday, you and I can...sit down..." she trailed off.

"And what?" Seven asked coldly, clearing wanting the Admiral to move aside.

Kathryn smirked, shaking her head.

"I don't know. Have a nice chat, I suppose."

"It has been twenty years," Seven reminded her, as if she needed reminding. "The time for a 'chat' seems to have passed."

"You knew where to find me," Kathryn breathed, suddenly feeling more vulnerable than she had intended.

"Yes," Seven swallowed.

Kathryn nodded slowly.

"Good to see you," she offered quietly, stepping aside and allowing Seven to pass through into the gallery.


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER FOUR**

Kathryn agreed to meet the Doctor at the brownstone he rented for work in the South End, not far from the Convention Center. She chose to walk again rather than use the transporters, even though they were conveniently spaced throughout the city. Along the way, she stopped in at a little shop for some chevre and manchego she thought the Doc would appreciate with their wine. She also snagged a bottle of Bordeaux for herself once she returned home, especially if her appeal to him did not work.

"Hello there!" the Doctor greeted her cheerfully seconds after she rang the bell.

"Boy, do I wish I had your ability to not get tired," Kathryn smiled, trying not to yawn.

"Trust me, it's not all it's cracked up to be," he admitted, taking her coat and guiding her into the living room. "There are many nights I wish I could nod off for a good night's sleep rather than hibernate in cyberspace."

"But then you'd have the unpleasant experience of waking..."

Kathryn froze when they reached the den.

"I thought it was just going to be us," she breathed slowly, trying to keep her calm as she glared at Seven, who was sitting on the sofa.

"As did I," the blonde added pointedly.

"Yes, forgive me," the Doctor responded, taking a seat in an oversized leather recliner near the fireplace. "I did lie, to both of you, though I knew if I didn't there'd be no way to get you here at the same time."

Kathryn continued to stand, contemplating her exit, which she knew was pointless.

"Explain," Seven demanded.

"I will. Please, Kathryn. Have a seat."

Janeway slowly approached the sofa, the only sofa in the small but warmly decorated room, planting herself on the far end from where the blonde was seated.

"I know as well as anyone that the two of you would rather hop into bed with a swarm of Regulan bloodworms than be in the same room together. However, I cannot tell you how much I appreciate the small efforts you made today on my behalf."

"Go on," Kathryn urged.

"I understand you had a falling out before we departed Voyager. The details remain unknown, and I don't expect you to share them with me now. But what I do need...is to ask the two people who mean more to me than anyone else in this existence, save for Jennifer and our son Martin, to aide me with my final request before I delete my program for good."

"Have you really considered Martin?" Kathryn asked somberly. "How is he supposed to cope with losing both parents in such a short period of time?"

"He's a grown man," the Doc insisted. "He's lived on Chaya VII as an intern for some time now. We chose not to tell him when his mother took a turn for the worse. It had come close so many times, and his program doesn't allow him to travel unless it's scheduled far in advance. I owe it to him now to visit, just for a few days. After that, he'll be fine."

"Joe," Kathryn began again, more pleadingly. "I can't begin to imagine what you must be going through, but this is not the answer. I'd say the same thing to any of my friends, even those who aren't made of photons and force fields."

"Yes, but they ultimately will perish of their own accord," he argued firmly. "I on the other hand, am destined to survive everyone who's ever meant anything to me. I could live forever if I chose to, attending your funeral, Seven's, Martin's. One by one, you'll all be gone. If I don't do this now, then when? If I were a carbon-based life form, I'd likely be in my 70s. It's pointless to speculate how long my human form would last before beginning to deteriorate, and therefore I see no reason why I can't decide that I've gotten everything I desire out of life and choose to end it now, on my own terms."

Kathryn shook her head. She glanced over at Seven, who continued to appear furious.

"Seven?" the Doctor asked. "Do you share the Admiral's adverse opinion regarding my decision?"

Seven took a deep breath and let go of some of the tension in her jaw.

"No," she told him assuredly. "I believe you have every right to decide what to do with your program...your life...without our interference."

She looked at Kathryn briefly, perhaps attempting to drive home the point.

"Forgive me, but you have not been put in a position to make the same kinds of decisions I've had to make," Janeway told Seven. "Before you came on board Voyager, there was a member of the Q Continuum named Quinn who asked to be granted asylum and turned human so that he could end his own life. He argued that immortality was like a disease, that living forever somehow cheapened his existence. I agreed to grant the asylum and let him live out his mortal days as a member of the crew, but Q gave him a poison that allowed him to commit suicide. I was not in favor of him choosing to die then, and I cannot stand by that decision now."

"But there is no way to make me mortal!" the Doctor reminded her, raising his voice slightly. "Ultimately, I am faced with that same miserable eternity Quinn described, only for me there's no antidote, no favor to call in from the Q. I could have made the decision without telling anyone, but I chose to let you, my closest friends, know what I intend, and I would prefer to do it with your blessing rather than simply disappear into oblivion."

Kathryn leaned back into the soft, smooth leather couch, scratching her chin, trying to make sense of what she knew to be fair.

"What do you want us to do?" she asked.

"I want you to be there with me when I do it," he swallowed. "When I delete my program, I want to stand on the beach at my home on the Cape, my two best friends by my side, and for you to be the last two people I see before I die."

Kathryn's eyes welled up at the thought: the three of them, their toes in the sand, staring out across the ocean at sunset, grabbing the Doctor's hand before removing his mobile emitter for the last time. She had not been present when her father died, had never actually experienced the death of someone close to her other than Kess and a number of crewmembers. Her mother was getting older, but it was something she avoided thinking about at all costs.

"I will be there," Seven spoke softly. "However, please do not mistake my conviction for apathy. I care...deeply. I simply wish to support you."

Kathryn could hear the pain in Seven's voice. The ex-drone was not without compassion, but rather seemed to rely on her stoic facade so as not to betray her true, complex emotions.

"Thank you, Seven," the Doctor smiled. "That means everything to me."

He removed a handkerchief from his pocket and dabbed at his eyes beneath his glasses before returning them to his face.

"Kathryn?" he asked hesitantly.

The Admiral pulled at her cuticles anxiously for a moment before looking up at the bald headed, gray-haired man. He'd chosen to augment his program so that he appeared older through the years, attempting to keep up with his wife's aging process. Even the glasses were unnecessary, but a part of the adaptations he had made to live a life almost fully human. How could she deny him the right to see that dream through to the end?

"Alright," she whispered.

"Thank you," he reached out and clutched her hand in his, squeezing it tightly.

"You choose the time, I'll schedule the trip," she added.

The Doctor let go of her hand slowly and sat up straight in his chair.

"Actually...that brings me to the second part of the favor I need to ask of you," he said, looking back and forth between the two women.

"What?" Kathryn labored to inquire.

"I leave tomorrow for my visit with Martin on Chaya VII," he began, looking away intermittently, clearly nervous about this part of the deal. "I'll only be a few days. In the meantime, there are a number of classified files in my home computer system that I have not been able to integrate with the data I am turning over to Starfleet. There are also several boxes of personal items I attempted to sort through since Jennifer's passing. Photos, keepsakes, things that I do not want to end up in a museum somewhere, or worse, with the press. I want the two of you to have them. Whatever you don't want can be discarded, discreetly of course."

He paused momentarily, trying to gauge the women's reactions. They appeared to be lost.

"What I'm asking...is for the two of you to stay at my home on the Cape until I return. It should be three days, tops. I know it is a lot to ask, but I simply need to do this as quickly as possible for fear Starfleet will find some reason to bar me from permanently deactivating myself. I can't wait, and there is no one else I trust to tie up the loose ends."

Kathryn and Seven continued to sit in stunned silence, trying their best not to steal a look at each other.

"And furthermore...I don't entirely trust that you would return should I permit you to go back to San Francisco and New Mexico. Who knows what excuses you might conjure between now and then."

"That's not entirely fair," Kathryn groaned.

"Maybe not, but I assure you it's the only way to grant me the peace of mind I need while visiting with my son. And... with any luck, perhaps it will give the two of you a chance to patch things up. I'd prefer our last day together be truly happy for all parties involved."

Now Kathryn couldn't help but look at Seven, who almost got away with the poker face, except for the bright crimson shade in her cheeks and ears.

If their earlier encounter at the cocktail party had taught her anything, the truth was, Kathryn hadn't really wanted to stay away all these years. But she was stubborn, and the only person she knew who rivaled her own stubbornness was Seven. What started out as a stand-off, each waiting for the other to apologize, had turned into twenty years of growing indignation, and at least on Kathryn's end, more hurt feelings than anything else.

"Looks like we have no choice," the Admiral shook her head, then turned to Seven. "What do you say?"

Seven did not make eye contact, instead looking at the Doctor. Even now, she refused to be the first to break.

"I will comply," she stated calmly.

"Excellent!" he exclaimed, clasping his hands together in front of him. "I can't tell you what this means to me. Now, I haven't exactly prepared a homemade meal, but we can certainly replicate something, if you don't mind."

The three proceeded through an awkward dinner, both asking the Doc questions and listening intently to his long-winded stories. After an hour or so, they headed back to their respective hotels, Kathryn choosing to walk again while Seven took the transporter. Alone in her room, the Admiral was able to finally think back on the last interaction she and Seven had on Voyager, figuring it best to sort out what parts she should truly be sorry for and which parts were more difficult to forgive and forget.


	5. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER FIVE**

Twenty years earlier.

_The homecoming reception was just as robust as Captain Janeway imagined it would be. All of their friends, relatives and Starfleet colleagues gathered on the ship, taking in the environment shared by the brave crew through their sojourn in the Delta Quadrant. B'Elanna showed off the hull modifications Admiral Janeway had given them for their last battle with the Borg, while Tom gave an impassioned and entertaining account of how they'd made it through the corridor that lead them back to the Alpha Quadrant in the nick of time. _

_Once the festivities died down, the Voyager crew got the chance to be together once more before going their separate ways. Some lingered on the Bridge, some gathered in Engineering. Others simply went back to their quarters to pack their remaining personal effects. _

_Janeway sat in her usual corner of the Mess Hall, sipping her fifth glass of champagne. She stared out at the night sky, much brighter than the vastness of space to which she had become accustomed. _

_For as happy as she was that they'd made it back in once piece, it disturbed her that she was not more joyous. She thought she would feel a sense of peace, of closure, but there were still so many uncertainties now that they were back. She had taken too many liberties with the Prime Directive to bring her crew home safely. If the celebration was any indication, perhaps all would be forgiven, but she wouldn't know until after her debriefing. On top of that, she wasn't sure what she would do now. Continue working in Starfleet, among ranks of people who hadn't experienced half the things she and her crew had in the past seven years? It felt shockingly anticlimactic. _

_And then there was her personal life. She'd have to face Mark and his new wife sooner or later, gather what things of hers he had kept, and find a new place to live. She knew her mother and sister would be a tremendous support, but for all their love could not foresee living with them. It had been so many years since she'd truly lived alone, and shockingly, the thought was more frightening than the possibility of living with the crew for their rest of her life._

_Suddenly, the soft murmurs of two familiar voices both cut through her anxiety and deepened it. _

_She slowly turned to the far corner of the room, where she spotted Chakotay leaning surreptitiously close to Seven, whose back was up against the bulkhead. She had rarely seen the blonde's eyes so open and full of playfulness. Perhaps it was the contrast she felt between her own situation and the promising future of the two lovers that spurred the wave of fury and nausea she felt rise within._

_The Admiral told Janeway that Seven and Chakotay were married in the future, before Seven's tragic death. Janeway had been absolutely ignorant of the fact that there was anything going on between her First Officer and the ex-Borg. However, the thought of Seven dying took precedence, and she quickly began following the Admiral's instructions. _

_The truth was, Seven was undoubtedly her favorite person on board. She knew having favorites was unethical, but simply couldn't help it. At first, she thought it was just the excitement of having saved someone so full of potential, of giving her a second chance and getting to watch her humanity unfold, again and again reaffirming that she'd at least gotten something right. She didn't really believe in destiny or fate, but part of her felt that if there was some deeper meaning behind why they'd been sent to the Delta Quadrant, perhaps Seven was it. _

_But beyond that, Seven was the most challenging, fascinating, mesmerizing person she had ever encountered, both in space and on Earth. A simple game of velocity on the Holodeck became a battle of wits, of mental and physical strategizing, and the most fun she'd had since embarking from Deep Space Nine. Making Seven laugh, no matter how difficult, had truly become her favorite debates stirred something within Kathryn that made her remember who she was, why she bothered continuing to fight. Once the Admiral told her the woman's life was at stake, she knew she'd risk anything to save her._

_She hadn't forgotten the part about Chakotay, but she'd been able to put it on the back burner, to deny it, until this very moment. Seeing them together now, she was finally able to process how it made her feel. Chakotay's actions-while entirely inappropriate, as far as she was concerned-were not that surprising. He'd always had a thing for blondes, but at the same time, didn't appear to be particularly choosy. Once Kathryn had rejected his advances, he continued to flirt, and with the exception of Tom Paris, seemed to be one of the crewmembers who had the hardest time keeping his libido in check._

"_Don't you think your behavior's a little unprofessional?" _

_She was suddenly aware she had crossed the room to where the couple was standing._

"_Captain," Chakotay stepped back from Seven. "We were...well, I suppose there's no reason not to..."_

"_I already know," Janeway whispered._

"_How?" Chakotay seemed dumbfounded. "We've gone to great lengths to keep things discreet."_

"_The Admiral," Seven spoke, appearing a bit embarrassed by the altercation. "It was inappropriate for her to share that information."_

"_Yes, well if she hadn't, none of us would be here now, would we?"_

_Seven swallowed._

"_Captain?" Chakotay asked. He hadn't been apprised of everything that led to Janeway's decision to follow the Admiral's orders, at least not the part about Seven's death. _

"_Nevermind, Commander," Janeway brushed him off. "We're home now. But while we're still aboard this vessel, I'd appreciate your continued 'discretion.'"_

"_Understood," Chakotay acknowledged._

_Janeway nodded her thanks._

"_No," Seven interjected abruptly._

_Janeway and Chakotay both turned to her._

"_I beg your pardon?" the Captain responded._

"_We are no longer under your command," Seven reminded Janeway, straightening her back, appearing to grow taller on her heels by the second. _

_Janeway couldn't help but laugh a little, though she found the situation far from amusing. She narrowed her eyes at Seven and leaned with one hand against the wall, partly an attempt to relax the situation, and partly because she was dizzy._

"_You may need to brush up on Starfleet protocol," Chakotay whispered to Seven, though loud enough for Janeway to hear._

_Seven turned her ire towards him for a moment, but softened as he looked at her imploringly._

"_Understood," she breathed._

"_Commander, I imagine you have things to take care of before disembarking?" Janeway asked._

"_Yes, I..."_

"_Would you mind giving me a moment with Seven?"_

_Chakotay looked back and forth between the two women, afraid to leave them alone for fear they might kill each other yet. Alas, he knew where he stood._

"_Of course," he smiled, still a little shaken by the exchange. "Am I dismissed?"_

"_Yes," Kathryn swallowed. "Thank you."_

_He nodded and briefly placed his hand on the small of Seven's back before leaving them alone. Janeway looked at Seven, whose cheeks were now completely crimson._

"_Let's reconvene in my ready room," Janeway offered, slowly disengaging from the wall. "Shall we?"_

_Seven wordlessly followed the Captain into the turbolift._

_Janeway paced before her desk while Seven stood at attention._

"_If you intend to continue berating me for my personal choices, I'd prefer we begin," Seven remarked._

_Janeway stopped pacing. She leaned back against her desk, steadying herself on the edge._

"_What are you thinking?" she spoke softly. "You have your whole career ahead of you."_

"_I do not understand your concern," Seven replied. "Are women on Earth unable to be both personally and professionally successful? I thought that line of sexist reasoning was abolished long ago."_

"_Mostly, yes," Janeway acknowledged. "But there are still those who might question whether or not a young, beautiful woman, genius as she may be, didn't get special treatment because she slept with a senior officer on her first mission."_

"_You know that is not the case," Seven bit back. "First, I did not seek to become a member of this crew. Second, I have not decided whether I will officially join Starfleet, so your concern of nepotism is premature. And third, the circumstances of this mission have dictated that many of the traditional rules around fraternization be broken. Simply because you yourself refrained from entering a romantic relationship does not mean others were mandated to do the same."_

"_No, but..."_

"_Are you jealous of my relationship with Commander Chakotay?"_

_Janeway faltered a bit, confused by the accusation._

"_Don't be ridiculous," she scoffed._

"_I know the two of you were stranded together on a planet for some time, believing you had no means of escape," Seven persisted. "He was forthcoming regarding his feelings for you."_

"_Then he must have also told you nothing happened," Janeway responded quickly. "Whatever feelings we may have had for one another were strictly circumstantial, at least on my end. I haven't even thought about it in ages."_

"_Then why are you so adamantly opposed to our relationship?" Seven argued. _

_Kathryn simply held her gaze. She took a deep breath, unable to form a response._

"_The Admiral indicated that if I did not do my part in bringing this ship home, I would not survive," Seven continued. "She said there were other reasons, other people, to consider in making the decision. People who... love me."_

_Seven swallowed. _

_Janeway appeared to be gripping the desk with her fingernails._

"_And you believe she meant Chakotay?" she whispered._

_Seven nodded hesitantly._

"_I think you're making a mistake," Janeway continued._

"_Why?" Seven asked pointedly._

_The Captain shook her head._

"_I believe you wish to control me, as you have from the beginning," Seven swallowed. "But despite Starfleet protocol, I am no longer yours to control."_

_Something about those words hit Janeway harder than anything Seven had ever thrown at her. It was never about control. She felt it was her duty to guide Seven at times, help her through the transition. But she had stepped back in the past few months, spent far less time with her, in fact, because she thought it was important to give her space to develop friendships and hobbies of her own. And yet, Janeway knew that she was being unreasonable now. She knew she should stand down, but something inside screamed at her that this was not the way the story was supposed to go._

"_Fine," Janeway breathed. "If you don't need me anymore..."_

"_I don't," Seven confirmed._

"_Then you're dismissed," she sneered, trying not to show any emotion beneath her aggravation._

_Seven continued to stare at her for a moment longer, and then left. _


	6. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER SIX**

The Doctor met Kathryn and Seven at the transporter to Cape Cod, an area of Massachusetts reconstructed years ago after Starfleet was able to reverse the effects of global warming. His home was on the coast in Chatham, a gorgeous area surrounded by white, powdery sand dunes, quiet marshes and a moderate climate. It once served as a major tourist destination during the summer months, but in the years post-reconstruction had been repopulated with fewer homes and structures, making it one of the most serene landscapes in the country. Both Seven and Janeway spent time there in years past, before Jennifer became too ill for visitors.

"I've left a good amount of gourmet items for you in the walk-in cooler, and there are many local restaurants that will deliver top-of-the-notch New England fare," the Doctor reported, handing over the codes to Kathryn for accessing every part of the house. "As I said before, I should only be a few days. I cannot tell you enough how much I cherish both of you."

"Don't mention it," Kathryn smirked, trying to appear calm, though she had no idea what was in store.

"Seven, I've given you instructions for identifying the files that need to be merged with my portfolio for Starfleet. You'll find the personal items in several boxes throughout the house. I apologize in advance for not having things better organized."

"I am happy to help," Seven attempted to smile, but was clearly uneasy.

The Doc smiled back before giving the nod for the operator to initialize the transporter.

Within a matter of seconds, they re-materialized on a bridge overlooking the small inlet wrapped around the Doctor's home, which stood between them and the Atlantic Ocean. It was a classic beachfront property, painted light blue with white trim along the roof and windows. The two followed the trail to the front of the house and up onto the expansive porch, where an old wooden bench swayed gently in the warm breeze. Kathryn reached into her luggage to retrieve the access code, but Seven flipped open the console next to the door and typed it from memory, permitting their entrance.

"Well," Kathryn breathed as she shuffled inside, dropping her bags in the foyer and taking a look around. All of the furniture was old world rustic, light wood, the occasional wicker. The colors were soft, the nautical decor simple but carefully chosen. "Doesn't appear to have changed much. I assume you know your way around?"

"Yes," Seven responded, closing the door behind them. She gathered her belongings and headed upstairs to the bedrooms. Kathryn followed.

They both paused when they reached the landing at the top. There were several rooms from which to choose.

"I prefer to sleep on the west side," Kathryn offered. "Less light in the morning."

Seven nodded, then proceeded to a room on the east end of the house.

The two took as much time as possible to unpack, but given it was only a short stay, found themselves wandering back downstairs and into the den in a matter of minutes. There were boxes piled in front of the fireplace, in the kitchen, along the hallways, and surely in parts they had yet to explore.

"Where to begin?" Kathryn mused.

"I will begin working on the file transfer," Seven declared.

"Alright," Kathryn sighed. "I guess I'll start with these."

She hoisted a medium sized box from the floor to the kitchen counter, opening it and peering inside. She couldn't help but laugh at what she found.

"Look at this," she stepped over to Seven, showing her the large book. "A beloved tome from the 21st century. Julia Child's _Mastering the Art of French Cooking_."

"No doubt one of Jennifer's belongings," Seven swallowed. "Given the Doctor does not partake in culinary efforts himself."

"No, but he certainly reaped the benefits thanks to those taste subroutines," Kathryn continued to laugh, a little sadly. "Her boeuf bourguignon was divine."

"I had not had the dish outside the Holodeck until she served it during one of my visits," Seven reflected.

"Ah, Chez Sandrine," Kathryn reminisced. "For a dive bar, the food was always spot on."

She flipped open to the first page and noticed the inscription.

"To my darling Jennifer. May your appetite for adventure never fade. Yours forever, Joe."

Taking a deep breath, she closed the book and slowly put it on the counter.

"I will commence with my portion of the work," Seven insisted, leaving Janeway alone with the box of intimate items.

They worked separately until nightfall. Seven finally emerged from the office and found Kathryn sitting in the kitchen right where she had left her. Kathryn looked up as the blonde approached.

"Progress?"

Seven shifted uncomfortably for a moment before responding.

"I have completed the task."

Janeway's jaw dropped a little, though she quickly recovered, remembering just how efficient the former Borg had always been.

"You've done everything? All the computer files? Sorted? Transferred?"

Seven nodded.

"Well," Kathryn smirked. "Guess that means you'll be joining me tomorrow with this Herculean endeavor."

Seven peered around the room and slowly became aware of the nearly 50 boxes Janeway had opened, pulling some of the contents to the floor, scattering others on the sofa, and piling a good amount on the counter next to her. The blonde swallowed, and for a moment, Janeway thought she looked a bit pale.

"Don't worry," Kathryn tried to offer reassurance. "I think I've worked out a pretty good system."

Seven raised an eyebrow.

"I'll bring you up to speed tomorrow," Kathryn insisted. "Right now I'm famished. How do you feel about ordering in?"

"I suppose it will facilitate proceeding through the evening more quickly," Seven sighed.

Kathryn tried not to take the blonde's displeasure personally. She could only continue pulling teeth for so long.

Forty minutes later, a local fisherman dropped off a heaping portion of fried oysters, clams and scallops, along with french fries and tartar sauce. Janeway spread the contents on newsprint across the countertop and motioned for Seven to join her on one of the bar stools. Seven eyed the food as if it were a feast of Klingon bregit lung, warnog and grapok sauce.

"What?" Kathryn scoffed. "You've never eaten like this before?"

"I immediately regret allowing you to order for me," Seven slowly took her place at the counter. "I believed you would make a more nutrient-rich selection."

"You said, and I quote, 'Order whatever you please,'" Kathryn reminded her. "Said you weren't that hungry anyhow."

"Indeed," Seven sighed, looking for utensils.

"Use your fingers," Kathryn instructed.

Seven marveled as the Admiral scooped up a cluster of clams and fries, dipped them into the sauce and appeared to consume them with immense pleasure, practically licking her fingers.

Seven's cheeks grew pink.

"That is...a rather primitive method."

"I assure you, it's the only way," Kathryn smirked between bites.

The older woman tried not to stare as Seven hesitantly reached for an oyster, selecting carefully from the pile of fried delicacies, methodically dipping it into the tiny tub of tartar sauce, before slowly bringing it to her lips and taking a bit. A bit clumsily, she caught the rest with her other hand and proceeded to finish the morsel as quickly as possible.

It took all of Kathryn's strength not to laugh.

"Good, aren't they?"

"They are sufficient," Seven was forced to agree once she finished chewing.

"That's high praise coming from you," Kathryn took a sip from her glass.

Seven noted the Admiral's beer.

"You appear to enjoy a fair amount of synthohol with your meals."

Janeway narrowed her eyes a bit, even as she took a swig.

"Can't have fried oysters without a good summer ale," she swallowed. "I'm sorry you can't partake. I think you'd find it's worth it sometimes."

Seven continued to tear her oysters into smaller bites.

"I require no additional substance to relax."

"Ha!" Kathryn shrieked.

Seven dropped the piece of fried food she held in her hand and stared at Janeway.

"Sorry," Kathryn smiled softly. "Maybe you're just afraid of saying things you'd regret."

Seven looked at her sharply.

"I believe that is what psychologists call 'projection.'"

Kathryn sighed heavily, wiped her mouth with her napkin and sat back in her chair.

"Look," she whispered deeply, bringing her eyes to meet Seven's, indeed feeling bolder than before. "I know neither of us would be here if it weren't for the dire circumstances. But now that we are here, perhaps we should attempt to make the best of things. Don't you agree?"

Seven sat up straight.

"I believe I am 'making the best of things,'" she replied.

"Okay," Kathryn exhaled. "Well then, for what it's worth...I'm sorry."

Seven raised both eyebrows this time.

"For what?"

Janeway ran a hand through her hair. She took her time, searching, until the blonde appeared to be getting impatient.

"Ruining your life, I suppose? If that's what you believe."

Seven looked at her incredulously.

"For judging you," Kathryn tried again. "For turning you off to the idea of joining Starfleet because of my own adherence to protocol."

Seven seemed to be equal parts puzzled and abhorrent.

"Do you really believe that is why I stayed away?"

"I figure it's as good a reason as any," Kathryn shrugged.

Seven shook her head.

"You are correct in that I did not join Starfleet because I had grown weary of following antiquated rules. Initially, after being severed from the Collective, that sort of structure was necessary, comforting. However, as I progressed in my social development, I realized I preferred less constriction. Your influence had little bearing on my decision."

"Alright," Janeway tossed her napkin onto the counter. "Still. I apologize."

Seven held her gaze.

Kathryn couldn't tell if she was buying it, though her sentiments were genuine. She wasn't ready to begin analyzing why she had behaved the way she did, nor was she ready to explain it to Seven, who seemed to be waiting for something more.

The blonde swallowed, exhaling slowly through her nose. They continued to stare at one another, Seven appearing to become more and more flustered. Finally she stood, gathering the remnants of her portion of the meal and discarding it in a nearby waste basket.

"If you'll excuse me, I will return to my quarters."

Kathryn wasn't sure if she had accepted the apology or not. She simply watched as Seven walked to the stairs, lifting her red skirt just above her ankles as she began the ascent.

"Goodnight," the Admiral whispered.


	7. Chapter 7

**CHAPTER SEVEN**

Seven intended to awake earlier, but considering the amount of light streaming through the windows, figured it had to be nearing 0900 hours. Lying back against the pillows, she stared up at the ceiling for several moments before rolling out of bed. She ran her fingers along the white chest of drawers, topped with several framed photographs of the Doctor and Jennifer. Lifting one of the couple picnicking on the beach with their son, she took a closer look at the smiling faces of a family she had gotten to know so well.

She put it down quickly and opened the closet, where she removed a silk, grey robe and donned it before proceeding downstairs.

The house was silent and dark, the curtains still drawn in the living room, though she noticed the door leading to the ocean was ajar. Concerned, she opened it slowly and peered outside.

Kathryn stood approximately a hundred feet from the house, still dressed in her pink nightshirt, which was just long enough to cover her thighs. Seven couldn't help but notice how muscular her legs were considering her age, although the red hair she insisted on sporting sometimes made her forget. The Admiral appeared to be watching something, and as Seven raised her eyes to sea level, her breath caught at the sight of dozens of seals jumping frantically through the waves. She gathered her robe at the chest and shuffled as gracefully as she could through the sand to where the Captain was standing.

"What are they doing?"

Kathryn was a bit startled, but quickly returned her attention to the sea.

"Running," the Admiral told her. "Most likely from a Great White."

Seven swallowed.

"Species Carcharodon carcharias."

"Yes," Janeway confirmed. "Have you ever seen one?"

Seven shook her head.

"I have not spent much time near the ocean," she admitted.

"Really?" Kathryn marveled. "I try to get down to the Bay as often as I can. Look at that!"

Kathryn grabbed Seven's shoulder and directed her vision to the dorsal fin slowly gliding through the surf several hundred yards out. Seven looked down at the Admiral's hand on her arm, and Kathryn quickly pulled away.

"Do you see it?" Janeway asked.

"Yes," Seven replied. "Judging by the size of the fin, it looks to be nearly six feet in length, approximately 2,300 kilograms."

"They haven't always hunted this close to shore," Janeway told her. "They've followed the seals as they've migrated."

"Great whites have an extra sense due to the Ampullae of Lorenzini, enabling them to detect the electromagnetic field emitted by the movement of living creatures," Seven shared. "Sharks can detect even half a billionth of a volt."

Kathryn tore her eyes away from the ocean to look at Seven.

"I have read about them," Seven clarified.

"Of course," Janeway smiled. "Fascinating, isn't it? There's so much out there we still don't know about, perhaps less than we know of space. The conservancy of the ecosystem prevents us from tampering with the environment much."

"An 'aquatic Prime Directive,'" Seven offered.

"I hadn't thought of it like that," Janeway smirked. "There's plenty to be learned simply from examining what's washed up."

She began walking along the shoreline. Seven watched, but did not move. Kathryn finally turned back and motioned for her to follow. Still too tired to come up with an excuse, the blonde joined her former Captain, and the two continued following the path the surf created down the beach.

"I'm sure you've never gone shelling, but you can find some impressive exoskeletons along the coast that might be of interest."

"The only time I have studied marine life, besides my infrequent visits to this home, was during a brief stay in New Zealand," Seven noted. "However, we did not spend an extended period examining molluscan formations, and we did not see a Great White despite their prevalence in the region."

"What were you doing in New Zealand?" Kathryn dared to ask.

She wasn't sure Seven would respond, given the lengthy pause she took before answering.

"Chakotay was invited to present at a summit on indigenous tribes," she sighed. "He asked me to join him."

"I see," Janeway treaded carefully.

"It was an interesting endeavor. I was compelled by the scientific relevance of oceanic species to the spiritual practices of ancient civilizations."

"No doubt," Kathryn acknowledged. "And did you find anything of use to your…"

She stopped as Seven let out a shriek in a pitch she had not known the ex-Borg was capable of making.

Instinctually, she latched onto the blonde's arm, and was glad she did, as she looked down at the mess of long, sticky tentacles barely visible beneath a stealth layer of sand.

"What…" Seven continued to gasp as Janeway helped her hobble up the beach, lowering her onto a safe spot.

"You stepped on a jellyfish," Janeway informed her. "A lion's mane, I believe."

"Species Cyanea capillata," Seven groaned. "It must have retained some of the nematocysts used to sting its prey."

"Let me take a look," Kathryn insisted.

Seven reluctantly allowed the Admiral to lift her foot onto her lap, where Janeway could clearly confirm the pinkish purple marks consistent with a jellyfish sting.

"It's not bad," Kathryn told her.

Seven gave her a death glare.

"I know, it hurts. I mean we can probably find an antidote back at the house."

Seven breathed heavily as she looked at how far they had walked, not a great distance on two feet, but surely a more arduous task in her current condition.

"Come," Kathryn put out her arms again. "I'll help you."

Seven allowed herself to be lifted, and leaning on the Admiral's shoulder, hopped steadily back up the beach towards the house.

Once inside, Kathryn planted Seven on the sofa in the living room while she searched through the doctor's database for a hypospray that would heal the wound.

"This should do the trick," Janeway assured as she returned with the instrument.

Seven continued to grimace as she lifted her leg onto the couch. Kathryn grasped it gingerly, balancing the limb on her own knee so she could get the best view of the sting.

"Hold on," she tried to soothe as she dispensed the solution along the bottom of Seven's foot.

Seven threw her head back and gripped the cotton fabric of the sofa with her fingernails to keep from yelping as the salve worked its way into her skin.

"Could be worse," Kathryn told her, keeping a hold of the foot. "Before hyposprays, the most common cure for jellyfish stings was urine."

Seven peered at the Admiral with hooded lids, clearly unamused, her cheeks red from pain and embarrassment.

Kathryn rubbed Seven's ankle a little, unable to stop herself from providing comfort.

"Sorry," she smiled. "Any better?"

"Significantly," Seven finally breathed.

Janeway looked at the foot again and ran her finger along the bottom, making sure there were no other lacerations. Seven shifted a little, though she did not attempt to pull away. Kathryn continued to stroke the slightly calloused skin, marveling at how even the austere ex-Borg was starting to show signs of a life well-lived. She looked up at the blonde, whose eyes had softened and simply appeared to be watching the Admiral. Kathryn let go of the foot and allowed it to fall gently onto the sofa.

"Well," she smirked. "So much for shelling."

Seven swallowed.

"Thank you," she spoke genuinely.

Kathryn thought she might burst into tears at the first hint of kindness from the younger woman in ages.

"Can't have you laid up for too long," she simply smiled back. "We have work to do."

Seven nodded, remembering the arsenal of boxes that surrounded them.

Kathryn eased herself up off the couch.

"Admiral," Seven stopped her.

She sat up slowly. Janeway looked down at her, not sure what to expect.

"I...apologize as well."

Kathryn leaned against the bookshelf next to the sofa, tracing the spine of a volume on Vulcan literature. _Twenty years of silence and that's it? _she thought. She had tried to make amends the night before and it hadn't gone very well.

"For?" she couldn't help but ask.

"My insubordination," she offered.

_Which time?_ Kathryn thought, but didn't dare spoil the moment.

"As well as the tone with which I spoke during our last encounter on Voyager," Seven continued.

Kathryn traded her attention between Seven and the books on the shelf, unable to fully commit.

"We both said things."

"Yes," Seven agreed. "And for my part…I am sorry."

"Me too," Janeway repeated her appeal from the night before, thankful for the blonde's change of heart.

"Nevertheless," Seven interjected again. "I still do not believe I fully comprehend what occurred."

Kathryn looked away again. She had not allowed herself to delve too deep in trying to sort out the complicated mix of emotion and circumstance that led her to approach Seven and Chakotay that evening. Now, faced with the blonde sitting on the couch, looking more vulnerable and ready to communicate than ever, she wanted to go there, wanted to tell her that it was not her long dissolved feelings for Chakotay, nor skepticism that the ex-drone would be taken seriously by Starfleet. Rather, it was her own apprehension as to what would happen next, her loneliness in the face of losing the family she had created, and yes, perhaps her own brand of jealousy, the source of which she had only begun to touch.

"It's been a long time," she practically whispered. "I don't know if I fully comprehend it either."

Seven looked at her skeptically, but could tell her former Captain was struggling.

"Very well," she relaxed a bit. "Perhaps it will come to us."

"Yes," Kathryn moved to sit on the ottoman opposite the couch, opening a box full of various knick knacks. "Shall we?"

"I would prefer a change of clothing," Seven suggested, looking down at her robe, which had slipped open to reveal a tighter gown beneath it. She eyed the Admiral's nightshirt, which had risen dangerously high along her thighs. Kathryn took note and quickly stood.

"Right," she laughed a little nervously. "Let's reconvene in an hour."


	8. Chapter 8

**CHAPTER EIGHT**

The two proceeded to dig through the parcels scattered around the house, sorting things into several categories: items Kathryn would keep, items Seven would keep, items they would ask the Doctor if it was okay to donate or pass on to others, and items to discard. It was difficult to put anything in the last category, but given that they each had limited space and the Doctor's son Martin could not keep much in his small apartment on Chaya VII, they were forced to make some tough decisions. Still, they agreed to divide the photos and items with sentimental value pertaining to Jennifer and Joe's relationship between the two of them, hoping to store the keepsakes until Martin could someday share them with his own family.

"They certainly took a lot of vacations," Kathryn remarked, looking through one album of various trips to Asia and parts of southern Africa. "I don't know when they had time for research."

"Nor do I," Seven agreed, sifting through a box of wooden trinkets and miniature sculptures made from bone. "Perhaps their travels served dual purposes."

"Oh my," Kathryn sighed wearily as she moved on to another crate. "Take a look at this."

Seven crossed the room to where Janeway sat on the floor.

"An entire box of copies of _Photons Be Free_," Kathryn scoffed, shaking her head. "Apparently they were on backorder for a while after it was released."

She lifted one of the programmed holodisks and handed it to Seven, who rolled her eyes.

"Trust me, I do not need my own copy. The details are permanently etched within my memory."

"I'll bet," Kathryn laughed. "'Three of Eight,' was it?"

"Yes," Seven continued to frown. "A radical activist for holographic rights, and the protagonist's ill-fated lover."

Janeway snorted.

"I didn't fare much better," she argued. "'Captain Jenkins'? It was a rude awakening."

"Rude, indeed," Seven scoffed.

"You know," the Admiral continued, lying back against the leather armchair near the fireplace. "He didn't exactly go to great lengths to hide his feelings for you. On more than one occasion…"

"I am aware," Seven blushed, though she smiled subtly to show she was not offended. Still, Kathryn felt it best not to push.

They continued working diligently, only beginning to tire as the sun went down.

"I can't sit like this anymore," Kathryn stretched, yawning as she raised her arms above her head and straightened her legs out before her. She stood, smoothing down the linen pants she wore with her black tank. "How about I take a look at what's left in the cooler, see what I can throw together for dinner?"

"Will it be deep fried?" Seven mused, raising an eyebrow.

Kathryn resisted the urge to stick out her tongue, not sure Seven would understand the gesture.

"No," she relented. "I think I saw Chilean sea bass. Would that be to your liking?"

Seven smiled, which Janeway took as a yes.

She began filleting the fish as Seven went around and opened the windows. The temperature had dropped at least 15 degrees since the sun set, lending itself to a pleasant sea breeze. The salt air wafted through the house, and as Kathryn prepared the meal, she was reminded of the many evenings she, the Doctor and Jennifer sat out on the deck watching the moonlight dance across the waves as they dined decadently and laughed about old times. It was heavenly. She still couldn't believe that Jennifer was gone, and could not even begin to fathom that Joe would also be leaving them soon.

She shook off the morbid thoughts and slid the sea bass into the oven, lightly marinated with miso, lemon, and a little butter she snuck in when Seven wasn't looking. Seven eventually joined her in the kitchen after tidying up the living room from the day's efforts.

"May I be of assistance?" Seven asked.

"Sure," Kathryn smiled, gesturing toward a basket of leeks and potatoes sitting on the counter. "Start peeling."

Soon enough, they pulled two chairs up to the large oak table on the porch with two generous plates filled with roasted rosemary potatoes and leeks, miso glazed Chilean sea bass, and a loaf of local bread they'd discovered in the pantry.

"What do you think?" Kathryn feigned sheepishness, pretty confident she had made up for last night's dinner debacle.

"It is most enjoyable," Seven offered before helping herself to another bite.

"I'm glad you like it."

The Admiral poured a glass of sauvignon blanc, promising herself she would only have one this evening, two tops.

"Tell me about Santa Fe," Kathryn finally asked, deciding it was now fair game.

Seven looked a bit uncomfortable, taking a long sip from her sparkling water before she began.

"It is an eccentric location. Because of its history as an ancient site of the Pueblo Indian tribe, its inhabitants remain dedicated to preserving the natural elements of the geographic landscape, as well as the culture. However, beginning in the twentieth century and spanning to today, there has been significant tension between those who wish to develop it as a hub of scientific inquiry and those who insist on allowing it to remain relatively untapped by Starfleet's colonization."

"Ah," Janeway sighed, hoping the history lesson would lead to more personal insights.

"Another odd juxtaposition is the continued prevalence of artists and musicians alongside a militaristic past, most notably the Japanese internment camp operated there during World War II."

"That's right," Kathryn remembered. "One of the most shameful periods in U.S. history, I'd say."

"Indeed," Seven swallowed. "After the Hirogen's extended occupation of Voyager, I became interested in learning more about the era. It was not until we returned to Earth, however, that I was able to trace my ancestry back to Germany. After witnessing the bloodshed and destruction perpetrated by the Nazis, I was afraid that perhaps my own family had been involved. Given my resistance to detach myself from the Borg, I feared there may be something in my nature, my genealogy, that made me a particularly apt candidate for assimilation. Thankfully, that was not the case."

"That's a pretty heavy approach to your family tree," Kathryn shook her head. " I'm glad it was not as traumatic as you anticipated."

"As am I," Seven breathed.

"But you didn't really answer my question," Kathryn prodded, pouring her second glass of wine. "I want to know what you've been up to all these years, other than work. I haven't been completely blind when it comes to your more than impressive accomplishments."

Seven's cheeks turned pink.

"Besides contributing to the Center for Advanced Nanotechnology, I have spent most of my time connecting with relatives, of whom there are few. Nevertheless, it has been a worthy endeavor."

Kathryn nodded, urging her to continue.

"I've also grown fond of sculpture and painting. I serve on the board for the New Mexico Museum of Art, and I am a frequent patron of several New Age music and healing festivals held annually in the region."

"New Age?" Janeway asked.

"A tradition drawing on both Eastern and Western spiritual and metaphysical traditions, infused with elements from psychology, holistic health and quantum physics."

"Fascinating," Janeway marveled. "You indicated your interest in spirituality earlier, on the beach, before the jellyfish incident. I remember your inquiries on Voyager, particularly with regards to Omega."

"Yes, though I have expanded my understanding well beyond the physical. The concept of collective consciousness, obviously, holds importance to me. Being able to merge both mental and physical components of being with the understanding that there is something beyond all of us, but which also lies within us, has helped me to acknowledge both my human frailties and strengths, to become an individual without feeling…alone."

Janeway watched the woman's face turn from energetic to more resigned.

"I imagine Chakotay helped," Janeway dared once more. "Given the commitment to his own spiritual practice."

Seven twirled her fork between her long, slender fingers, fidgeting more than Janeway had ever noticed. Part of her felt bad for pushing the blonde, but she could not stave off her curiosity.

"We are no longer together," Seven stated almost matter-of-factly.

"I don't mean to pry," Kathryn fibbed. "Tuvok mentioned something, but I know nothing of the details, and I don't necessarily…"

"We lived together for fifteen years," Seven continued. "At first, it was an agreeable arrangement. We supported one another in our endeavors. And yes, he was an asset in helping me find my own spiritual path."

Kathryn wanted to say she was sorry things hadn't worked out, but could not bring herself to lie again.

"Unfortunately, his personality and mine were not always...compatible."

"Oh," Janeway swallowed.

Seven seemed to catch herself off guard, shocked at how much she was revealing. She paused, looking away.

"It's alright," Kathryn told her softly. "You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to. I haven't seen him in ages. We used to run into each other at Starfleet occasionally, certainly during the debriefing. It was polite, strained. We never spoke of you."

Seven took a deep breath. She continued to debate for a moment, watching the dark waves crash along the shore.

"He could be...overbearing," she admitted.

Kathryn swallowed harder.

"Oh."

"I do not know why I am telling you this."

"Maybe you need to talk to about it," Kathryn almost whispered. "I can be a pretty good listener, if you recall."

She smiled softly at Seven, who half-smiled back.

"There is not much more upon which to elaborate. He believed it was his duty to continue...cultivating...my humanity. I did my best to provide a partnership that met his needs. However, my growing desire to be largely independent did not fit his vision for our relationship. When I attempted to develop friendships and interests that were divergent from his own, he became...indignant."

"I see," Kathryn tried not to show just how much the revelation irked her. "So you never married?"

"No," Seven replied. "It was not something either of us felt was necessary. He did wish to procreate. However, I did not believe that together we would make suitable parents."

Seven continued to shift, stiffening a bit as she crossed her legs.

"I apologize for speaking ill of him," she continued. "He was your friend for many years."

"Yes," Kathryn nodded. "But that doesn't mean I can't acknowledge his flaws. He was a good First Officer, and occasionally, a reliable confidant. But I could see where he may have been territorial, and from what I know of you, that simply would not fly."

"Precisely," Seven smirked, trying to lighten the conversation again. "Nevertheless, forgiveness is, I believe, an important lesson. One I am obviously still learning."

She raised her intense blue eyes to Kathryn once again, smiling a little sadly.

"I'm glad you told me," Kathryn said before finishing off her glass and pouring another.

Seven nodded, then returned her gaze to the horizon.

"I, for one, always thought you could do better," Kathryn suggested boldly, eyeing the blonde mischievously as she took another swig.

"Clearly," Seven bit back playfully. "Though perhaps it would have been helpful to explain why."

Kathryn knew she had walked right into that one. She ran a hand through her red mane and sat quietly for a few minutes, watching the blonde as she eyed the surf ebbing and flowing along the beach, her bright blue peasant top billowing steadily against her chest.

"You mentioned healing as part of your New Age philosophy," Kathryn finally cleared her throat. "What exactly does that entail?"

"There are a number of modalities developed by ancient civilizations that are still in use today," Seven responded, allowing the subject to be changed. "Mind melds and vision quests were my first encounter. However, there are others with which you may not be familiar."

"Such as?" Kathryn continued, relaxing into the soft cushions of her wicker chair.

Seven raised a curious eyebrow, though her lips betrayed her enjoyment of the conversation.

"I myself practice the Japanese energy therapy known as Reiki," the blonde continued. "It is a form of alternative medicine involving the application of hands in order to soothe mind, body and spirit."

"Interesting," Janeway noted. "What do the hands do?"

Seven tried not to roll her eyes.

"They do not 'do' much. The goal is to allow the energy to flow through the practitioner to the individual receiving. Anyone can learn, but there is training involved to develop the necessary steps required to channel. If anything, it has helped me 'let go' of the need to completely comprehend everything I encounter."

"I can see where that would be appealing," the Admiral marveled. "I'm intrigued."

"Would you like me to demonstrate?" Seven offered.

Kathryn almost choked on her wine.

"Do I have to move?"

"Minimally," Seven told her. "You will need to sit slightly forward in your chair."

Kathryn hesitantly put down her drink, but went with it. She scooted to the edge of her seat.

"Alright," she breathed. "Now what?"

Seven stood, circling the table until she was standing behind Kathryn's chair.

"I will only proceed if you are truly comfortable," she questioned. "Though I assure you, it will be a tranquil experience."

"I'm game," Kathryn agreed, swallowing back her remaining reservations.

"Very well," Seven spoke softly. "You may close your eyes."

Kathryn did as instructed.

"Focus on your breath, inhaling and exhaling naturally," the blonde continued. "Listen to the sound of the waves. You may feel a warm sensation once we begin, perhaps tingling, or you may feel nothing. All that is required is for you to remain seated, breathing slowly, letting any thoughts that come simply pass without considerable assessment, allowing the tension in your shoulders to drop down, releasing, as you continue to breathe."

Kathryn felt herself being lulled into a state almost trancelike as she breathed in the sweet, salt air, tasting the ocean. She allowed her breath to fill her abdomen fully, opening her in ways she hadn't known she could still be opened. As she exhaled, she felt herself relinquish the heaviness she had been carrying, all of her trepidation about this trip, her reservations with the Doctor's decision, the grief over Jennifer's passing. She tried not to focus on anything in particular, though her mind buzzed with a million unanswered queries. Slowly, she let herself relax, reveling in the serenity of her surroundings.

She tried her best to remain still as she felt Seven's hands gently rest atop her head, just barely touching. She refused to let the self-indictments about her dye job or other aspects of her appearance interfere with the chance to melt into Seven's gracious touch. Slowly, she felt the hands slide past her temples, covering her ears, cocooning her with a subtle vibration as her eyes remained closed. She felt herself simultaneously drifting further and further away, and at the same time, could not remember when she had ever felt so entirely present.

The hands moved to cover her eyes, followed by the back of her skull, cradling her occipital bone. She exhaled deeply as she felt Seven's fingertips begin to slowly massage that part of her scalp, sending pleasant flutters down into her neck. She fought back the tears welling up behind her lids, knowing this sort of release was likely part of the process, but unable to allow herself to fall apart. As Seven's hands came to rest tenderly along her collar bones, she purposely coerced her mind into focusing on the sound of seagulls in the distance. And yet, as warm palms traveled down her arms, delicately embracing her shoulders, she could not stop her brain from flooding with a mix of colors, words and images so vivid and soothing she was certain she'd tapped into another level of consciousness. The revelations these visions incited were received with a clarity both unsurprising and terrifying, as if she were finally coming home to a dream she'd long since buried.

As the hands returned to the top of her head, she felt as if she were levitating. She could still feel Seven's fingers on every part they had touched. A few moments later, the air around her swirled with an inexplicable coolness, and the peace she had slipped into remained even as the hands left her body.

"You may open your eyes," Seven whispered.

Janeway slowly complied, though it was difficult to come back. The blonde circled to the other side of the table and sat, waiting for the Admiral to return fully.

"That was..." Kathryn sighed, wishing for something more profound. "Remarkable."

Seven nodded.

Kathryn attempted to focus her eyes a little better, leaning back into the chair.

"Thank you, Seven," she spoke softly.

"You are welcome," the blonde swallowed. "Do you have questions about the experience?"

Janeway thought for a moment. She had plenty of questions, none of which she felt ready to share.

"You mentioned mind melds," Kathryn began hesitantly. "This...Reiki...doesn't involve your ability to perceive my thoughts. Does it?"

"No," Seven assured. "Whatever thoughts you encountered were entirely your own."

_Good_, Kathryn thought, wishing she had considered that before they began.

The two continued to sit in silence a while longer. Seven breathed steadily, watching Kathryn as she still appeared to be floating. The Admiral swallowed.

"I think I'd better head to bed before it becomes impossible to climb the stairs," Kathryn admitted.

"Indeed," Seven stood. It was getting late.

When they reached the landing on the second floor, Kathryn wanted to say something to share just how grateful she was for Seven's willingness to open up, to allow her into her life again after such a ridiculous period of silence and distance between them.

"I will attempt to awake before 0800 hours," Seven reported. "Given that we likely have one more day before the Doctor returns."

"That's right," Kathryn covered her mouth as she yawned. "I think we can manage."

Seven remained still, watching the smaller woman before her as she stretched.

Kathryn felt compelled to reach out to the blonde. Before she could talk herself out of it, she slowly leaned forward and gently grasped Seven's left hand with its metal implants still wrapped around each fingertip. She hadn't noticed them during the Reiki session, their cold, smooth texture contrasting with the incredibly warm softness of Seven's skin. She squeezed the hand quickly before releasing it, returning her gaze hesitantly to the blonde's face. Seven's lips remained still, but she smiled back fiercely with her eyes.

"Goodnight," Kathryn said, retreating to her room on the opposite side of the house.

"Goodnight," Seven echoed, before shutting her door and turning out the lights.


	9. Chapter 9

**CHAPTER NINE**

The next morning, Kathryn sat sipping her coffee at the kitchen counter, still tingling from the night before. The experience had awoken something within her, fanned a fire that had burned blue, even as she attempted to douse it with a cold shot of reality.

On one level, a layer of doubt and confusion had been lifted. She found herself more at peace about her decisions during the seven years she'd attempted to make it back to Earth, knowing it was all part of some divine law that needed to unfold just as it had, and she'd done the best she could. On the other hand, she was now faced with realizing the story had indeed never ended.

Stirred from her thoughts, she heard footsteps coming down the stairs and looked up as Seven entered the room. She wore an electric yellow blouse-much like the free-spirited garb she had donned in days past-over a pair of tight, black, almost leather-like leggings. Her hair hung in loose golden waves, and her feet remained barefoot. The Admiral swallowed another sip of coffee, almost burning her tongue.

"Good morning," she cleared her throat.

"Good morning," Seven replied as she entered the kitchen to pour herself a glass of water. "Did you sleep well?"

"Indeed," Janeway breathed. "Whatever you did to me, it worked."

Seven smirked as she took a long swill.

"You look like you're ready to go to town," Janeway couldn't help but comment on the blonde's look.

Seven rolled her eyes, but nevertheless continued to smile.

"I have run out of clothing more suited to residing within the house," she admitted. "I do not care for wearing the same items day after day."

Kathryn grinned widely at the admission.

"You've become a bit of a fashionista, I see."

The blonde blushed.

"Do you disapprove of this ensemble?"

"Goodness, no," Janeway assured her quickly. "I think it's rather alluring."

Seven's cheeks continued to burn as she held the older woman's gaze. Janeway stared back.

A sudden beeping noise interrupted their exchange, snapping the women from their reverie.

"A subspace communication," Seven noted, crossing into the living room where the screen was mounted on the wall. Janeway joined the blonde in front of the console. Seven pressed a few buttons and the Doctor's face appeared.

"Good morning, ladies," he smiled sweetly, a sharp contrast from the dark, sterile apartment he sat in on Chaya VII. "You both look like you're in one piece. I take it you're getting along?"

"Yes," Janeway swallowed. "We've had some time to ameliorate our differences."

"Wonderful!" Joe exclaimed. "I cannot tell you how happy that makes me."

The women smiled briefly at one another before returning their eyes to the screen.

"How is Martin?" Seven asked.

"He's not taking things quite as well as I'd hoped, but I think we're finally coming around to an understanding," the Doctor's smile faded a bit. "I should be returning home tomorrow morning."

Kathryn took a deep breath, wanting desperately to try reasoning again, but afraid it would only make things more difficult.

"We'll look forward to seeing you," she told him instead. "Anything in particular you want us to prepare for your arrival?"

"No need to do anything special," he assured them. "Though I have some ideas I will share once I arrive. In the meantime, I have composed a letter for each of you. I wanted to share some of my thoughts about our friendship. I'd appreciate it if you'd read them before I return so you'll have the opportunity to respond, something I know I wish I had done with many people I've known who have passed away."

Kathryn nodded. She stole a look at Seven, who appeared to have slipped back into an emotionless state. She wondered what was going on behind those reflective, steel blue eyes.

"Well then," the Doctor sighed. "I will see you both at approximately 1100 hours."

"Understood," Seven swallowed.

"Enjoy your last night on the Cape," he smiled, before waving rather impishly and signing off.

They both stood still for several seconds, apparently taking in everything that had and would transpire.

"Can you download the letters?" Janeway asked.

"I will retrieve them before joining you in the attic," Seven sighed. "We have done all we can with the materials in the rest of the house."

Kathryn nodded, leaving Seven to complete the task.

After crouching her way into the attic, Janeway massaged her lower back before she began opening boxes, most of which were marked "Voyager." Apparently, this was where the Doctor kept most of his mementos from their time aboard the ship.

She lifted a small velvet box and opened it slowly. Inside was the Starfleet Medal of Commendation she had awarded him after he staved off an attack by the Hierarchy with his improvisations as "Emergency Command Hologram." She laughed quietly to herself as she held the tiny metal pin, remembering just how eager the Doctor had been to propose he be made Captain in case of extreme duress, only to crumble under pressure when given the chance. Thankfully, his imagination came to the rescue. His daydreams had no doubt gotten them into the situation in the first place, but Kathryn overlooked that part of the equation, feeling he had indeed earned their praise for his efforts.

"Here is your letter," Seven interrupted her thoughts.

"Thank you," Kathryn sighed, wiping her brow before taking the pad from Seven's hand. "It's hot up here."

"We should work quickly," Seven spoke softly, appearing less energetic than earlier. "There is still much to be done."

"Agreed," Janeway replied. "I was just thinking back on Joe's stint as the 'ECH.'"

She flashed the medal at Seven before returning it to its box.

"One of his more indulgent ventures," Seven sighed. "I hope he did not retain any of his sketches."

Janeway swallowed hard as she remembered the first fantasy she witnessed: the Doctor sitting in front of a canvas, meticulously drawing Seven, who laid on her side, nude from the waist up. She'd joked about it then, feeling very guilty for imposing.

"Right," Kathryn tried to laugh. "I never spoke with you directly about that incident."

Seven blushed a bit as she opened another box.

"At first it was shocking," Seven admitted. "Though I could not remain angry towards him. Everyone is entitled to have fantasies."

"Indeed," Janeway breathed.

"I seem to recall your own interest in recreational delusions with regards to Fair Haven," Seven smirked, looking up at the Admiral. "Michael Sullivan, was it?"

Kathryn's jaw fell open. Her cheeks went rosy, even as she raised an eyebrow.

"Michael Sullivan was not a delusion," she argued. "He was just as real as the Doctor."

Seven laughed softly. The sound was a godsend to Kathryn's ears.

"Far be it for me to deny you that experience," the blonde noted. "Given your self-imposed regulations regarding romance with the crew."

"You make me sound like a prude," Janeway teased.

Seven glared playfully as she opened another box and pulled out an ancient-looking contraption.

"The holographic imager," she confirmed.

"Dear God," Janeway groaned, leaning back against the wood-paneled wall. "I'm surprised it's not in pieces. I thought surely someone would strangle him after one of those slideshow presentations."

"He is certainly not one for brevity," Seven agreed.

The two continued working for hours, only stopping for a quick lunch before returning to the attic.

Janeway shuffled through one of her boxes, eventually pulling out a flowered lei.

"Before you arrived, Neelix would throw luaus on the Holodeck," Kathryn shared. "They could get pretty wild."

"I do recall Ensign Delaney mentioning a 'pig roast' during one of our shifts in Astrometrics," Seven shuddered.

"The Delaney sisters," Kathryn appeared to remember something. "Damn!"

"Admiral?"

"It's my sister Phoebe's birthday," Kathryn shook her head. "With everything that's happened I completely forgot about it."

"Perhaps you should attempt to contact her," Seven suggested.

"Yes," Kathryn nodded. "I'll only be a few minutes."

The Admiral excused herself, leaving Seven to continue working on the parcels.

She moved on to the last box in her corner, also marked "Voyager," but taped shut. She was unsure at first if she should open it, but given that they were instructed to go through everything, figured she should. After tearing off the sealant, she pulled back the cardboard flaps and peered inside.

Very slowly, she reached in and pulled out a pile of sheet music. Sitting right on top was a yellowed document with the words "You Are My Sunshine" written across the top. Seven ran her finger along the first few bars, remembering how the Doctor taught her to sing the tune, how they'd harmonized together. It was one of her favorite social lessons, shortly before she told him she would not continue under his tutelage.

She took a deep breath and continued to rummage through the box, finding a number of other items from their lessons, gifts she had given him, a special pad that had been uploaded with all of her medical records and a log of her progression, especially in the early days. She put it all back in the box and sat on her heels staring at it, suddenly feeling a bit dizzy. She pulled the pad with the Doctor's letter from her pocket and began to read.

Minutes later, Janeway returned.

"I'm glad I called now," she shuffled back into her spot. "Apparently my mother is dragging her to some awful show at the Fillmore. I don't know why she doesn't just…"

She looked up at Seven, who was staring blankly into space, motionless and a bit pale.

"Seven? Are you alright?"

Seven pulled herself together momentarily, sliding the pad back into her pocket.

"Yes," Seven responded quickly. "I may also require a short break."

"Why don't you get some fresh air?" Kathryn suggested. "I'll keep working."

Seven nodded, and without another word, climbed out of the loft.

After sorting through a few more items, Kathryn couldn't delay reading her own letter any longer. She lifted the small metal pad and pushed the few buttons necessary to unlock the screen.

_Dear Kathryn,_

_God knows we've been through it all. From countless injuries and life-threatening illnesses to a number of heated debates and debacles, we have maintained a connection that goes beyond that of a simple computer program and his Captain. Next to my namesake and creator-the original Dr. Joe Zimmerman-you are the closest thing I have to a family of origin, a mother figure, if you will. _

_I cannot tell you how much your support of me over the years has meant, especially as you helped Starfleet understand my need for independence. Because of you, I have been permitted to live the life I always wanted, a life absolutely rich with laughter and love. Even through my darkest hours-those of late being the darkest-you have stood by and helped me to embrace my humanity, much in the way you once helped Seven embrace hers. I know that you do not agree with my decision to terminate my program, but I also know that, as you always have, you will stand by me when I need you most, and for that I will be eternally grateful. _

_You are a magnificent woman, Kathryn. My final wish for you is that you will, as I have, dare to live your life to the fullest, opening your heart to the people who remind you why you fought so determinedly to bring us home._

_Thank you, my dear friend, for all that you are._

_Love forever,_

_Joe_

Kathryn wiped away the tears relentlessly streaming down her cheeks. She knew they had grown closer over the years, but she hadn't known just how deeply he cherished their relationship. For someone who always wished she'd had children, to be considered a mother figure by not just anyone, but a man she truly admired, was enough to give her a sense of purpose and fulfillment that had been missing from her life until now.

She vowed that she would continue to grow in the direction he called for in his final wish. Truthfully, she'd already taken the first steps.

She tucked the pad into her pocket and wiped away the rest of her tears, suddenly remembering the woman downstairs and noting it had been more than a few minutes since she'd been gone. She achingly pushed up off the wooden floor and stood, making her way out of the attic.


	10. Chapter 10

**CHAPTER TEN**

Kathryn noted the back door was open and slowly crept towards it, not wanting to startle Seven, but afraid of intruding if she needed a moment to herself. Hesitantly, she peered out onto the porch. Her eyes scanned the area until she looked down at the steps leading to the beach, where Seven sat, gazing out at the waves. The bottle of Bordeaux Kathryn bought in Boston and had stored in the pantry sat next to her. Seven held a full glass.

Janeway swallowed before proceeding out onto the deck.

"That was supposed to be my wallowing wine," Kathryn admonished softly. "What the hell are you doing?"

Seven looked up at her, tears clearly painted down her cheeks, which she attempted to wipe away quickly.

"I am able to have one," she breathed.

"You lied?" Kathryn smirked, lowering herself onto the step.

"No," Seven sniffed back her remaining tears. "I simply did not communicate the entire truth."

"Same difference," Kathryn rolled her eyes, though she continued to speak softly. "Perhaps it's not such a great idea to…"

"Are you going to resume telling me what I should and should not do?" Seven looked at her sharply.

Janeway noted her eyes were already beginning to dilate.

"You're a grown woman," she shook her head. "You can deal with your emotions as you please."

Seven continued to glare, though the sparkle in her eye seemed to denote more than anger. She lifted the bottle and handed it to the Admiral.

For the first time in ages, Kathryn seriously considered refusing a drink. She stared at the bottle, searching for the willpower she knew she lacked, before grasping it from the blonde's hand and taking a swig.

"Not bad," she sighed.

Seven continued to watch the ocean, her breath lining up with the waves.

"I take it you read the letter?" Kathryn finally continued.

Seven's knees shook as she rested her elbows on them, rocking just barely, before taking another sip from her glass. She did not respond.

Kathryn took another deep breath and very slowly reached out, bringing her hand to the blonde's back, rubbing gently along the invisible line between her shoulders. She watched Seven close her eyes and continued to rub, trailing her hand to the blonde's arm, squeezing gently. She let go only as Seven reached into her pocket, removing the pad before handing it over to the Admiral. Kathryn looked down at it in her hands, then back up at the blonde.

"Are you sure you want me to…"

Seven nodded, and Kathryn clicked open the document.

_Dearest Seven,_

_I am not sure where to begin. Next to my letter to Martin, this is without a doubt the most difficult one I have had to write. I suppose I could start by saying how much I appreciate your unflinching support of my decision to end my life, just as you have supported me through Jennifer's illness, through my fight for sovereignty over my program, to be recognized as sentient, to be taken seriously among our colleagues. None of it, however, comes close to what I really must tell you._

_Before I met Jennifer- who I loved and adored for nearly twenty years, whose partnership I would not have traded for anything in the universe- you, Seven of Nine, were the love of my life. Your beauty, in every sense of the word, captured my imagination and ignited my spirit in a way that no other individual ever had. If you had not come into my life, I am not sure I would have garnered the same amount of hope and determination necessary to develop my program as far as I have, nor would I have been confident enough to pursue a relationship with another flesh and blood being, marrying her and having a family together. _

_What I mean to say is, serving as your doctor and the tutor for your social development was no less than an honor and a blessing, but you have changed and shaped the course of my life just as much. I know that you did not return my romantic overtures, and while it pained me at the time, I am thankful that instead we have shared an incredible friendship. _

_You are a marvel, Seven, not only for your brilliance, nor simply for your strength through the changes you were forced to endure, but because beneath that Borg exterior, there has always been a most noble and compassionate woman. Both Admiral Janeway and I saw it from the very beginning, and it was one of the greatest gifts of my life to get to know you as you unfolded before my very eyes._

_My final wish for you is that you will continue to open yourself to the world around you, to your humanity, embracing the experiences and the people who make your heart sing._

_Love forever,_

_Joe_

Kathryn shook off the tears welling up, feeling her throat constrict, but knowing she needed to be strong for the woman sitting next to her. She reminded herself to breath, realizing she'd stopped as she read the Doctor's final wish to Seven, so undeniably similar to the one he had given to her.

Nevertheless, this letter was far more personal and revealing. She knew the Doctor loved Seven, recognized the look in his eyes whenever the ex-drone entered the room. Seven had clearly been aware as well, but not likely to the depth of those feelings or how they had morphed through the years.

She returned the pad to Seven, then resumed gliding her hand over the thin yellow fabric.

"Maybe we can still talk him out of it," Janeway whispered.

"No," Seven replied, tilting her glass against her lips and finishing off the contents.

"Alright," Kathryn spoke slowly.

Seven stood abruptly, wobbling a bit before finding her feet. Kathryn tensed, afraid she wouldn't be able to catch her should she fall.

"I am hungry," Seven revealed, the timbre of her voice slightly higher than usual.

Janeway stood, shaking her head and taking another ill-advised sip from the bottle as she followed the blonde into the house.

"What should I make?" Seven asked from the kitchen, holding open the door to the cooler.

"How about something simple?" Kathryn replied.

Seven leaned against the counter with both hands, smirking as she narrowed her eyes at the older woman.

"Are you questioning my ability to cook a sufficient meal?" she asked.

"Not at all," Janeway insisted. "I just thought…"

"Join me," Seven demanded before returning to the cooler.

After a series of negotiations rivaling those she had made with Cardassians, Kathryn got Seven to agree to sandwiches. The two sat on the couch as they ate.

"This dinner is inferior to the one you prepared for us last night," Seven lamented. "I wished to reciprocate."

"No worries," Kathryn assured her. "I've always loved PB&J."

"It is meant for children," Seven sneered as she took another bite.

"That's right," Kathryn continued. "Growing up in Indiana, I ate them all the time. I have fond memories of my mother sending us off to school with a lunchbox full of delicious treats, plebeian as they may be."

Seven wiped her mouth with her napkin before taking another sip from her second glass of wine.

"Do you return to Indiana frequently?"

"Not as often as I'd like," Kathryn admitted. "Though I plan to stay through the holidays this year, weather permitting."

Seven looked at Janeway pensively as she leaned back against the sofa.

"You promised you would take me there."

Janeway looked up at her quizzically.

"I did?"

"On Voyager," Seven reminded. "When we began receiving data from Starfleet, images of Earth. You said you would show me where you came from."

"So I did," Kathryn marveled. "My apologies for not remembering."

Seven shrugged.

"One of several promises forgotten."

"Seven…"

"'No worries,'" Seven mimicked. "Perhaps you will make up for it in time."

She handed the bottle back to Kathryn, who took it again slowly.

"I should stop," she sighed. "One of us needs keep their wits about them in case there's an emergency."

"We are several hundred miles from other humanoids," Seven insisted. "There is no imminent danger."

Janeway raised an eyebrow.

"Your logic seems to be impaired."

Seven glared as she put her glass down on the coffee table, pushing it away.

"Very well," Seven sighed. "Perhaps you were correct."

"Regarding?"

"My ability to refrain from saying things I may regret."

Kathryn swallowed.

"I don't think you've said anything incriminating," she told her, leaning back against the opposite arm of the couch. "Not yet, anyhow."

Seven breathed steadily as she held Kathryn's gaze. She stretched out her legs along the length of the couch, stopping just short of where Janeway sat. Janeway looked down at the blonde's toes, pale and painted blue to match the color of her eyes.

"Admiral…"

"Kathryn," Janeway whispered.

Seven paused, looking very unsure, before continuing.

"Kathryn," she proceeded awkwardly. "Why do you believe Admiral Janeway returned to save us?"

Kathryn figured the query was inevitable.

"That's a good question," she sighed. "One I don't believe I can ever fully answer, considering my future self was not exactly the same as my self in the present."

"I am certain you have enough information to form a significant hypothesis," Seven continued.

Kathryn felt like she was about to implode. The answer was right there, on the tip of her tongue, but she could not bring herself to come forth with it.

"I don't think this is the right..." she shook her head, beginning to stand.

Seven lunged forward, grabbing Kathryn's wrist, not firmly, but enough to stop her in her tracks.

"Seven," Kathryn groaned, her heart pounding in her ears.

"I have waited many years," the blonde insisted, breathing heavily.

Kathryn looked back at Seven, her face less than an arm's length away. She could smell the wine on her breath, her large eyes fixed upon Kathryn's own blue-gray orbs. They appeared to be in a stand-off once again, only this time, twenty years and thousands of miles weren't standing between them. Their guards were crumbling, and Kathryn knew if she didn't give her something now, it would cut even deeper than it had before.

She looked down at Seven's hand, still holding her wrist tightly, as if she were afraid Kathryn would run out the door and hop on the transporter back to San Francisco. She returned her gaze to the blonde's face and tried to convey with her eyes that she could trust her to stay.

Finally, Seven relinquished her grip and sat back a few inches, ready to pounce again if necessary.

"I believe…" Kathryn swallowed. "She wanted to bring her entire crew...everyone...home safely."

Seven's eyes began to soften.

Kathryn took a deep breath before continuing.

"She said that if I didn't do exactly as she instructed... the consequences would be dire...that I would be filled with immeasurable regret."

Seven's chest heaved as she exhaled sharply through her nose, her cheeks growing more red by the second.

"Proceed," she urged.

"She told me," Kathryn went on, her eyelids growing heavy, drunk on the exchange. "That if I did not act...you would not survive."

"Did she say how I would die?" Seven interjected.

Kathryn wasn't sure she should tell her, but given that the temporal Prime Directive was no longer at stake, figured there was no real harm, at least not to the timeline.

"She said you would be injured on an away mission," Kathryn paused, taking another deep breath. "That you would die...in the arms of your husband...Chakotay."

Seven appeared to stop breathing.

"Seven?" Kathryn asked.

"Would you have gone through with the plan had the Admiral not shared that information?"

She was determined, Kathryn could tell. It was almost as if she were manually extracting the information from her, bit by bit, attempting to piece together the puzzle that had no doubt sat with her for two decades.

Kathryn wanted to lie, but again found herself compelled towards honesty by Seven's incredibly beautiful, incredibly close eyes.

She shook her head no.

Seven nodded slowly. She took a few moments to process, configuring the options and weighing them before moving forward with the interrogation.

"Your former self traveled back in time to save us," the blonde spoke clearly, despite her inebriation. "To save me?"

Kathryn nodded yes.

"So that I could marry Chakotay?"

Kathryn suddenly felt a wave of nausea hit her, not from the alcohol, but from the same place it had come that night she approached the two lovers in the Mess Hall. She remained motionless, unable to confirm or deny anything.

"Why, then," Seven continued. "Were you so vehemently opposed to my relationship with him?"

Janeway shook her head once again.

"I told you," she tried, looking exhausted, defeated. "I thought you could do better."

Seven continued to breathe. Kathryn knew that if she pushed any further, the truth would come out.

"I wanted you…" she continued. "To be free."

Seven visibly sighed. Kathryn dared to look back into her eyes once again, fearing the blonde had become completely disgusted with her inability to express how she really felt. The risk was still too great.

"I'm sorry," Kathryn sighed, chastising herself for being a coward.

She watched as Seven sat back against the couch, her legs pulled up beneath her, still inches away.

"Don't be," Seven whispered, looking anywhere but at Kathryn, her eyes glued to an indeterminate spot on the floor.

"What?" Kathryn needed to ask.

"Do not apologize," Seven swallowed. "If you had not done as you describe, I would not be alive today. I should have thanked you long ago."

Kathryn released her legs, sitting back against the sofa, next to Seven, staring at the same spot in space, feeling lighter than she had in years.

"Why didn't you?"

Seven did not respond for what felt like minutes.

"I was...confused," she swallowed. "I did not understand why you would go to such great lengths to save me, given that you had distanced yourself from me for several months before the Admiral arrived."

Kathryn shook her head, overwhelmed by the misunderstanding.

"I thought it best to give you space," the older woman explained. "Allow you to develop your own friendships, the kind of companionship I, as Captain...was unable to provide. How could you think..."

Seven looked at the Admiral again, searching her face. Kathryn allowed the blonde to scrutinize her, undoubtedly perplexed by her ambiguity.

Moments later, Kathryn felt a weight fall softly against her side. She looked down at the blonde head resting on her shoulder, afraid she had passed out from the effects of the alcohol on her cortical implant.

"Seven?"

"I am dizzy," the blonde whispered.

Kathryn grabbed her shoulders and attempted to pull her up so she could look into her eyes.

"No," the blonde resisted. "I will be fine, please. Allow me to rest for a moment."

Kathryn could not deny her that. She reminded herself to breathe, the fear that Seven was ill trumping all other emotions surging through her brain and trickling down into her body.

"You need water."

"I will get it momentarily," Seven argued.

They continued to sit for what felt like forever. Kathryn monitored the rise and fall of Seven's breath, worrying all the while.

"You're falling asleep," she warned, her own eyes beginning to droop.

"I prefer to sleep alone," Seven told her firmly, but did not move. "Another sore point between myself and Chakotay."

Janeway could almost feel Seven smirk against her shoulder. She cursed herself.

"Really?" Kathryn bit her lip. "Doesn't sound like much fun."

"It is my preference," Seven insisted, shifting against Kathryn's body. "Though I assure you, we did have 'fun.'"

"Spare me the details," Kathryn swallowed, heart racing, breathing against the crown of Seven's head, several hairs grazing her lips. "Although... it's been so long... I might not mind."

Seven became very still. Kathryn was afraid she'd crossed the line.

"Perhaps if you show me Indiana..." Seven murmured.

She did not finish the sentence.

Kathryn looked down to confirm Seven had indeed fallen asleep. Careful not to wake the blonde, she slowly lowered herself onto the couch more fully, allowing them both to recline. She kept her eyes fixed on Seven for awhile, making sure she was alright, stunned and beyond nervous at the prospect of them waking up together in this position. But despite her racing mind, within a matter of minutes she was also sound asleep.


	11. Chapter 11

**CHAPTER ELEVEN**

The light streaming through the curtains hit Kathryn's eyelids directly, causing her to stir. As she slowly opened her eyes, her gaze fell on the blonde still sleeping heavily across her chest, sprawled against her body in a manner so far removed from her days within the regeneration chamber in Cargo Bay Two.

If someone told Kathryn only days ago that this was the position she'd find herself in, she would have never believed it, not for a million years. She thought back on how many times she had wished, when they were still aboard Voyager, that she could wrap her arms around the younger woman, comforting her in moments of distress, reassuring her that everything would be okay. Last night was the closest she had come. Now, she longed to pull her closer, but fear continued to win out. She regretted more than ever that she may never get another chance.

Remembering what day it was, Kathryn checked her watch, only to find it was approaching 1100 hours. Doctor Zimmerman was due back any minute.

She began to stretch her limbs, craning her neck down hesitantly. The smell of Seven's hair hit her nose, like jasmine mixed with the unmistakable and not at all unpleasant scent of titanium, the kind used to build Starships. It was a clean, familiar smell that ran alongside a less familiar aroma, that of sweat and skin, equally enticing.

She shook it off and reached for the blonde's shoulder.

"Seven," she spoke softly but firmly. "Wake up."

Seven slowly opened her eyes. Upon realizing she was not in her own bed, she sat up too quickly, bringing her hand to her temple and squeezing her eyes shut against the light as she began to take in her surroundings.

"Why are we…"

Kathryn did not respond at first. She watched as the blonde rubbed her eyes, checking her optical implant for damage, struggling to make sense of what transpired.

"Do you remember anything?" she finally asked, unsure of which answer she was more afraid.

Seven looked at her, eyes a bit puffy and still half-closed.

Slowly, she nodded yes.

The Admiral swallowed.

"What can I get you?" Kathryn asked.

Seven shifted uncomfortably.

"I believe a hypospray composed of carbon and hydrogen should help."

Kathryn returned moments later with the concoction, along with some water, allowing Seven to administer it herself.

"I'm sure this is last thing you want to hear, but we may be joined by a materializing hologram at any given second," Kathryn warned.

Seven rolled her eyes, straining to adjust her neck.

"No doubt his mood will conflict with today's agenda."

Kathryn smiled sadly, knowing it was true.

Seven turned towards her, giving her a look Janeway could not decipher. She simply did her best to keep breathing, letting the blonde's eyes penetrate for as long as she desired.

"I apologize for my behavior last night," Seven finally spoke. "I seem to be making poor decisions as of late."

Kathryn wasn't sure how to take the comment, but hoped it was not a blanket statement for the entire weekend.

"No need to apologize," she shook her head. "I'm glad we got a chance to...clear the air, so to speak."

Seven swallowed, apparently letting the details flood back in.

"Besides," Janeway quickly changed the subject. "I know you were upset and you don't feel well now, but damn you were funny."

Seven raised an eyebrow.

"Be thankful I stopped when I did," she smirked. "Had I climbed onto the roof and attempted to construct a warp core from the weather vane, I doubt you would have found it 'funny.'"

Kathryn almost bowled over with laughter.

"Oh I'd love to hear the rest of that story," she smiled.

"I have already revealed more than enough," Seven blushed.

Kathryn continued to laugh. She reached out and put her hand on Seven's shoulder.

"Trust me," she smiled. "I don't mind."

Seven continued to blush, slowly looking up at the Admiral again, whose cheeks were also pink. Their eyes remained locked for what seemed like minutes. Kathryn's heartbeat pounded in her ears, threatening the silence as she realized her hand was still on the blonde's arm, and neither of them seemed to mind.

Seven opened her mouth and was about to speak just as they heard the Doctor coming through the front door.

"Honey, I'm home!" he joked as he called to them.

The women greeted him warmly, though they noted how much smaller he seemed, less sure of himself. Clearly the visit with Martin had been more tumultuous than expected.

"The two of you have done a tremendous job," he marveled at how well his belongings had been sorted.

"What can I say?" Janeway tried to lighten the mood. "We make a good team."

She glanced over at Seven, whose blush persisted, though she appeared to be growing more anxious by the second. Kathryn swallowed.

"Well," Joe sighed, sitting on the ottoman across from the sofa. "I suppose there's no reason to delay. I've kept you long enough. I only have one, final request before we proceed."

Seven and Janeway both looked at him skeptically, wanting to be supportive, but unable to fathom what more he could possibly want from them.

"I've put together a slideshow comprised of various photos throughout the years. Some are from our time aboard Voyager, others are from my courtship with Jennifer, Martin's early years, etcetera. I'd like to view them together one last time, if you don't mind."

Kathryn grimaced slightly at the thought of sitting through another one of the Doc's slideshows, but this time, it was more out of grief than annoyance. She looked over at Seven, who she could tell was doing all she could to keep it together.

"It's your day, Doctor," Kathryn did her best to smile. "We're happy to oblige."

"Thank you," he nodded solemnly.

They watched as he worked at the console for a few minutes, loading the program, before he returned to his seat and crossed his legs, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, preparing himself, before the show began.

An image of Voyager sitting in its now permanent dock on Deep Space Nine faded in. A nostalgic and perfectly melodramatic classical number played in the background, fitting for one of the Doctor's presentations. Kathryn laughed to herself, trying to make the best of things, ready to let go of her reservations. She knew this was not her decision, and that fighting it now would only cause further pain and chaos for all of them.

There were photos of away missions, of her and her crew sitting on the bridge, celebrating in the mess hall, welcoming visitors aboard the ship. Most were redundant, a recap of their daily routine. Some, however, as the slideshow progressed, began to hit a nerve, particularly those from Seven's first few months with them. The blonde looked more miserable and out of place than Kathryn remembered, and she wondered how the Doctor managed to get a photo of her without being subsequently punched in the face.

Nevertheless, as the years continued, the two clearly bonded. There were photos of them playing Katiskat with Naomi Wildman, helping Neelix prepare for Belanna's baby shower, singing together at a piano on the Holodeck, and simply working side by side in Sick Bay.

Kathryn wanted to check on how Seven was holding up, but was transfixed by an image of her and the ex-drone together, standing slightly out of focus behind Tom and Harry in Engineering, clearly having a debate as they stood rather close in proximity. As the photos progressed, there were more of them together, socializing, conversing. There were several in which Seven was engaged in a discussion with someone else, though Kathryn stood nearby, watching. Her facial expressions were animated, to say the least, and her body language made Kathryn cringe as she realized just how clearly she had worn her heart on her sleeve. How could Seven have possibly thought she didn't care?

Soon, the photos captured their lives after returning to Earth, of Joe's first few dates with Jennifer. They met during the second annual Medical Marvels conference. She had been eager to learn more about him and his discoveries, an accomplished physician and engineer in her own right. Joe often discussed how they both felt torn between the duty of practicing medicine and their undying fascination for programming and technology. Jennifer was also the only person Kathryn ever knew who could match Joe's sense of humor, their taste levels shockingly and sometimes unnervingly similar, though the two were so sweet together it made up for it.

A photo of Joe looking down at Martin as a tiny infant, Jennifer lovingly watching from a distance, finally unleashed Kathryn's tears. She quickly wiped them away, committed to getting through this, to standing by her friend as he made the choice that was best for him.

She could hardly imagine losing someone she loved as much as Joe loved Jennifer. The thought made her ill.

If he were younger, able to age and decline naturally, she would absolutely insist he fight through it. But now, given the circumstances, she couldn't rationalize forcing him to live indefinitely.

Several minutes and dozens of slides later, they'd gone through all the highlights of the happiest years, before Jennifer's illness took hold. There were fewer photos towards the end of her life, when she struggled just to get out of bed in the morning, let alone continue their research.

The last two slides featured a group photo of Voyager's senior officers, together once again (with the exception of Chakotay) at this year's conference, followed by one of Joe and Martin together on Chaya VII.

The screen faded to black.

Kathryn wiped away a few remaining tears before bringing her hands together in applause, smiling through the pain as she looked over at the Doctor, who smiled back, though he was clearly shaken. He stood, taking a deep breath and straightening his back, bowing a little as Kathryn crossed the room to him, throwing her arms around the EMH and hugging him tightly.

"That was beautiful," she whispered.

"Thank you," he sighed. "That was my life. And yes, it was, in many respects, quite beautiful."

"I read your letter," Kathryn swallowed. "I can't even begin to tell you how much it meant to me. I'm honored to call you my friend, just as I'm honored to be here with you today."

Joe continued to nod, afraid to open his mouth for fear he would begin to sob.

"As much as it hurts," she continued. "You have my blessing."

"Thank you," he finally whispered back.

They hugged once again.

Finally, Kathryn turned around to face Seven.

The blonde sat motionless, like a statue, eyes still fixed on the screen.

"Seven?" the Doctor spoke hesitantly. "Did you read your letter?"

Slowly, she turned her head to look at him. Her eyes glistened, throat tense, jaw clenched, temples throbbing, clearly afraid that with any sudden movement, she may completely fall apart.

"You don't have to say anything," Joe swallowed. "Not yet. Why don't we go…"

"No," Seven's voice shot across the room with such deep, aching desolation, it's wretchedness struck Kathryn in the gut. She gripped the Doctor's arm to keep from faltering.

"What's that?" the Doctor asked, clearly uncomfortable, trying to understand what was happening.

Seven breathed heavily, tears beginning to fall freely down her cheeks. Kathryn wanted to approach her, but something in the way Seven glared kept her from moving a muscle.

"I will not allow you to delete your program," Seven spoke through her teeth.

"Seven," the Doctor spoke softly, pleadingly. "I'm…"

"You are not ready to die," Seven rasped, her voice threatening to break with every syllable.

Kathryn couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"I thought it wasn't up to us," she spoke softly, trying to reach the blonde through her agony, but keeping her distance. "You said…"

"I am not ready," she sniffed, trying not to suffocate as the tears continued to flow and she fought to catch her breath. "But neither is he."

"Seven," Joe approached, kneeling down next to the sofa. "You know I've given this great consideration. It's not an easy decision, but I thought you, of all people, understood."

"Why?" she asked him. "Over the past two decades, I have grown as an individual. I am no longer severed from my emotional center, able to separate feelings from other cerebral processes. I am no longer Borg, and you are no longer a hologram."

"I don't understand," he shook his head. "You know I can't make myself mortal. If I don't do this, I will suffer more losses, endure more pain than you or any other humanoid can possibly fathom!"

"You may not be mortal, but you are also not a machine," she seethed. "You are not a thing, a program that can be shut off, deleted. You have evolved beyond those limits through the connections you have made with others, through your spirit, your essence. You are a limitless being."

"Seven…"

"In your letter," she cut him off again. "You asked me to embrace those who make my heart sing. You are one of those people. Through your guidance, your friendship, you have shown me what it means to be human just as much as any flesh and blood individual, if not more. There are still many years, many lessons we both must learn. I refuse to let you terminate your life until we have both seen each other through those lessons, until you can truly tell me you have nothing left to live for, nothing left to give."

Kathryn was practically beside herself. She watched the small, bald-headed man slowly break, beginning to sob as his head fell into Seven's lap.

Seven laid a hand on his cheek.

"I miss her!" he weeped.

"Yes," Seven sniffed. "You will continue to miss her. But we will adapt."

"Please," he shook his head, sitting up.

"No," Seven repeated. "Kathryn was right when she said she would not stand for any human acquaintance taking their own life. As you have chosen to live as human, I believe you deserve the same treatment."

"It's my decision!" the Doctor demanded.

"You're right," Kathryn dared to interject, taking a seat next to Seven. "It is your decision. But it is also our responsibility, as your friends, to assist you when you're in this much pain, to help you see clearly where your grief is blinding you."

Joe took a deep breath, wiping away his tears as he struggled to his feet, moving to the ottoman, looking back and forth between the two women keeping him from following through with his plan.

"Would you really stop me?" he asked incredulously. "How human does it make me if I am physically barred from doing with my own being as I so choose?"

"You can choose," Kathryn continued. "I agree with Seven. I don't think you're ready, but I stand by my word to support you in whatever decision you make."

Seven glared at Kathryn, the tables flipped, but Kathryn put up a hand to stop her from interrupting.

"One year," Kathryn offered. "Give it a year. If by then you still want to die, then I won't stop you. But I believe you'll choose to live."

"I cannot wait a year!" the Doc insisted through his tears. "What if Starfleet…"

"I will ensure they do not find out," Kathryn declared in all seriousness. "And if they do, I will forbid them from interfering with your right to freedom."

Seven continued to stare at Kathryn skeptically, though she remained silent.

Joe sat still for a few moments, clearly anguished as he appeared to consider the bargain.

"A year is too long," he whispered. "A month..."

"Six months," Kathryn responded firmly. "Not a day more, not a day less. And you must promise not to do anything until then. I'll be here for you, if it means checking in every few days from San Francisco, visiting as often as I can. Seven?"

Seven appeared to snap back from a daze, her head no doubt pounding.

"We can speak daily via comm signal," she swallowed. "Or, I can arrange to work from here until…"

"That won't be necessary," Joe told her, finally appearing to come down from the proverbial ledge, taking a deep breath. "I can manage on my own."

"Perhaps you should stay in Boston," Kathryn suggested. "Continue to check in on the project. Better yet, allow yourself to explore other interests. Music, art, all of the things you've put on hold over the years. This could be a new beginning."

"I'm not sure I'm ready for a new beginning," Joe sighed. "Nevertheless...staying at the brownstone... is not a bad idea. There are fewer...memories, distractions."

Kathryn reached out and took his hand in her own, rubbing the back of it with her thumb, smiling as bravely as she could. She glanced at Seven, who appeared to be less afflicted, but still deeply troubled. Very slowly, she also reached out and took the man's other hand, holding it gently.

"You must promise," the blonde sniffed. "You will wait until we are together again."

His brow furrowed, still looking rather indignant to their proposal, he finally let go of some of the tension in his shoulders. Squeezing both their hands, he nodded in agreement.

"Alright," he whispered. "Six months."

"Thank you," Kathryn breathed.

"You leave little room for dissent," he scoffed. "How can I refuse the two most beautiful women I know begging me not to leave them?"

He attempted a small smile.

Kathryn resisted rolling her eyes. She could feel Seven's energy shifting back to at least neutral.

"Why don't we stay a few more days?" Kathryn suggested to the blonde.

"No," Joe interjected. "Thank you, but if I'm going to do this, I may as well jump right in. If you'll assist me, I think I'll return to Boston tonight."

"Alright," Kathryn breathed, continuing to smile. "Let's get you packed up."

For the next several hours, Seven helped Joe compile the final data package to send to Starfleet while Kathryn loaded the boxes she and Seven intended to take with them onto the transporter pad. Joe and Seven helped make several more trips out to the dock once they were finished, and by early afternoon, they were almost ready to depart.

Kathryn packed her small suitcase rather quickly, though she couldn't stop thinking about Seven and how absolutely distraught she had been. She had never seen the younger woman weep or express her emotions so openly. She had indeed progressed lightyears in her social development, just as Kathryn always hoped she would. Still, from what she gathered, Seven didn't have many close friends, and was no doubt headed back to an empty house in Santa Fe, leaving her with no one to debrief with about everything that had occurred.

She took a deep breath as she crossed the second floor landing to the east side of the house, where she gently tapped on Seven's door. There were several moments of silence.

"Come in," the blonde finally permitted.

Kathryn opened the door and stepped into the room. She was surprised to find Seven lying on the bed, her suitcase packed, but clearly in no hurry to leave.

"How are you feeling?" the Admiral asked, hesitantly taking a seat at the foot of the bed.

"Exhausted," Seven sighed, sitting up slowly. "It was necessary to perform Reiki on myself to release some of the heaviness from this morning."

"I'm sorry," Kathryn offered. "I interrupted you."

"No," Seven breathed. "I was finished."

"Good," Kathryn swallowed. "That was...intense earlier, to say the least."

Seven scooted towards the edge of the bed, letting her feet hang off the side. Finally, she looked up at the Admiral, concern painted plainly across her face.

"How can you be sure he will choose to live?" she spoke quietly, not wanting Joe to hear. "In six months, we may find ourselves faced with the same situation."

"Then we'll figure out another way to stop him," Kathryn whispered back.

"You have promised not to interfere."

"That's right," she smiled sadly. "But perhaps I failed to communicate the entire truth."

Seven raised an eyebrow. Her smile was subtle, but clearly she was trying to have faith.

"Your tactics are unconventional."

Janeway threw her hands up in the air.

"When have my methods ever been orthodox?" she laughed.

Seven swallowed.

"Risk is sometimes necessary to attain desired results," the blonde noted. "However... in this case…"

Kathryn shook her head, bringing her hand once more to the blonde's shoulder.

"Try not to worry," Kathryn whispered. "Worry is irrelevant, remember? He'll come around. And if he doesn't...we'll deal with it, when the time comes."

Seven nodded slowly, wiping away a tear. Janeway was surprised she had any left.

"Thank you," Seven breathed. "If you were not here...I am not sure how well I would have handled this."

Kathryn smiled softly, tracing her fingers along the blonde's shoulder, her tricep, finding it impossible to stop touching her.

"You were incredible, Seven. The things you said...I was speechless."

Seven looked up again as Kathryn continued to rub her back.

"I am also thankful for the time we have spent together," Seven whispered.

Kathryn sighed visibly, staving off her own tears.

"I couldn't agree more," she breathed.

The two seemed to have gravitated closer on the bed. Kathryn could smell Seven's breath again, a little stale from the night before, but somehow, still uniquely and pleasantly Seven's.

Kathryn swallowed hard as she felt the blonde slowly reach into her lap and take her hand, returning the gesture she had shared two nights ago after the mesmerizing experience out on the porch.

Before she could stop herself, Kathryn took a deep breath and leaned forward, enveloping the ex-drone with her arms. She could feel Seven's heart racing against her own, and for a moment was afraid she would not reciprocate, until she felt her wrap her own arms tightly around her and squeeze.

Kathryn shut her eyes.

"I can't believe I've never done this before," she whispered.

"On several occasions," Seven whispered back. "I wished you would."

Kathryn's breath caught as she deepened their embrace, sliding her fingertips across the younger woman's back. Seven shivered but did not let go. Instead, she brought a hand to Kathryn's head, slipping her fingers through her hair.

The Admiral's hands rose to Seven's shoulder blades again, gripping the bones beneath her thin yellow blouse. She couldn't remember the last time she had held someone like this.

Very slowly, Seven pulled back, though she kept her arms firmly wrapped around the older woman. As their cheeks slipped past each other, Kathryn caught a brief glimpse of Seven's closed lids before they opened, the blue of her irises seeming to swirl around pupils just as large as the night before.

"Ladies?" the Doctor knocked on the door. "Are we ready?

The two pulled away from each other, faces flushed.

"Be right out," Kathryn responded, feeling a bit like a teenager getting caught by one of her parents.

_Don't be absurd_, she thought.

She finally stole a look back at Seven, who was already looking at her.

"I don't suppose you'd be interested in visiting Indiana this winter?" Kathryn blurted out.

Seven blushed.

"I will need to check my schedule," she swallowed. "There are projects, events at the museum, for which I am responsible."

"Of course," Kathryn shrugged as she smiled. "Just trying to keep my promises."

Seven breathed heavily through her nose.

"Perhaps I will find time," she smiled back. "I would prefer to see you before six months from now."

Kathryn smirked.

"I'd like that too."

The two painfully rose from the bed, and Kathryn returned to her room to fetch her belongings before the three proceeded to the transporter and made their way back to the city.

After helping the Doc settle in and making him promise to communicate with each of them at least weekly, the Admiral and Seven returned to South Station, where they quickly bid farewell before going their separate ways.


	12. Chapter 12

**CHAPTER TWELVE**

Back in San Francisco, Kathryn returned to her typical routine of meeting with Cadet Stevenson, though she began taking on a few more lectures here and there, somehow needing to keep busy since her time on the Cape. When she wasn't at Starfleet Headquarters, she spent as much time as she could down at the local pub, people watching and having dinner with almost anyone who extended an invitation. Suddenly, the silence and stillness of being at home were too much, or perhaps too little, to keep her mind from drifting back to those three days, particularly the last hour she and Seven spent together at the beach house.

"But you're doing alright?" Kathryn asked Joe pressingly as she watched him on her comm screen. They kept their promise to meet weekly in the two months since she'd returned from Chatham.

"Yes," he sighed. "There's never a dull moment. No doubt you and Seven spread the word for people to keep me busy."

"That's all you, Doctor," Kathryn shook her head. "You've always been popular. Why would things be different now?"

Joe took a deep breath. He still looked quite heartbroken, though she knew getting out with colleagues and visiting friends was the best thing for him.

"I suppose you're right," he rolled his eyes. "That said, I have a meeting with Dr. Helsnik in a few minutes."

"Give him my regards," she smiled.

"I shall," Joe nodded. "See you next week."

Later that evening, Lira met with the Admiral to go over the usual slew of invitations and requests.

"No more forums on Bolean digestive remedies, please," Kathryn sighed. "I'll compromise with the panel on Katarian endocrinology. At least Samantha and Naomi will be there."

"Very well," Lira smiled, typing away at the pad in hand.

"If that's all, you can head out early," Kathryn offered.

"Actually... there is one more," the Cadet swallowed. "From S. Hansen."

Kathryn froze. She tried not to move a muscle in her face, though she couldn't stop the sting creeping into her cheeks.

"I see," she breathed. "Did you…"

"Only the first few lines," Lira told her.

The young woman handed over the pad to the Admiral.

"Ah," Kathryn smiled awkwardly. "Thank you."

Lira nodded. She continued to stare at the Admiral, awaiting further instructions as Kathryn looked down at the pad, placing it on the desk in front of her, watching it as if it were about to sprout legs and walk away.

"Is there anything else you want me to…"

"No, that's fine," Kathryn straightened her shoulders. "You're dismissed."

Lira smiled, though she was clearly disappointed she wouldn't get to hear more about the contents of the letter.

Once she was gone, Kathryn took a deep breath. Lira was more than just your average Cadet. She'd made it clear in her resume that she was a "fan" of the Admiral. Sometimes, Kathryn felt like a let down considering she hadn't been very active for the first few months they'd been working together, but thankfully she'd been inspired as of late to do more.

Therefore, it wasn't entirely shocking that the young Cadet's ears would perk up at the letter from Seven, since she knew the two hadn't been on speaking terms for years prior to the conference. Kathryn hadn't told her, nor anyone, why she'd extended her stay in Boston, hadn't even mentioned she'd been on the Cape.

Kathryn truly wasn't expecting to hear from Seven. Although they'd grown closer in the few days they'd spent together and had talked about keeping in touch, she knew both their schedules were inundated. That said, she felt her stomach clench as soon as Lira read the blonde's name, and for some reason, felt a little uncomfortable. She believed she could trust Lira to be discreet due to their confidentiality agreement, but part of her wondered whether or not she should have said something.

Then again, she thought, why make a bigger deal out of it than necessary? What was there to tell?

That she and Seven had finally made up after twenty years of not speaking?

That she'd admitted the only reason her future self went back in time was to save her?

That every moment they'd spent together in Chatham was more exciting than the past two decades combined?

She quickly pressed a few keys and opened the letter.

_Dear Kathryn,_

_I am certain you have settled back into your post-retirement duties with Starfleet, as I have resumed work with the Center for Advanced Nanotechnology. I told you I would check my schedule with regards to visiting Indiana this winter. Unfortunately, it does not appear there will be sufficient time. Thank you, once again, for the invitation._

_I felt compelled to write this letter, inspired by the Doctor's approach to sharing his feelings prior to his attempt to end his life. While it did prove to be emotionally draining, I believe his intention was admirable. I have since questioned why one must wait until the end of one's life to tell others how much they mean to them, and decided it would be better to share my thoughts now, before another twenty years have passed. _

_During my first few months on Voyager, I resented being severed from the Collective. I was scared, unsure if I would ever be able to regain my humanity. However, as uncertain as I felt, I knew, somewhere within me, that I was never truly alone. For the first time in my life, I felt wanted in a way that far surpassed the Collective's desire to retain me. You helped me to believe I was meant for more, that I was unique. Along with the Doctor, I credit you with giving me the chance I wish I could now bestow on the millions of individuals I helped assimilate. I know that I have thanked you in the past, but feel that once again I must reiterate my gratitude._

_As for our dispute prior to disembarking, I have already apologized for the manner in which I spoke. I believe my emotional state was heightened due to several factors. As I became interested in engaging in romance, I did not have the proper support to guide me through the sensations I experienced. Due to the Doctor's admitted interest, I became uncomfortable discussing it with him. At the same time, while I have always respected your role as Captain, you were also my only close female companion. The moments we spent together, whether in Maestro Da Vinci's workshop, playing Velocity, or simply conversing late at night in your quarters, meant more to me than I was able to adequately express. You were an excellent mentor, a role model for the strength, resiliency and diplomacy I wished to cultivate, and beyond that, an exceptional friend. That is why it was so distressing when you became distant. Perhaps my expectations lead to misperception and disappointment. However, I do not believe I mistook the level of our connection. _

_That said, I have certainly accepted your apology with the understanding that you believed giving me space was important for my development. I appreciate that you had my best interests at heart, but must admit, I did not ever feel I needed space from you._

_Chakotay and I were together for fifteen years. I cannot deny the affection I felt towards him. However, I believe it was my desire to "fit in," to develop into what I thought was a sufficient woman based on the Doctor's social lessons, that led me to seek him out. Although you have said I could do better, I could not foresee an alternative at the time. The prospect of being alone on Earth, without my Voyager family, made me feel as if it was the best choice I could may be why I became angry when you appeared to judge me, and perhaps the fear of having made the wrong decision is what kept me from contacting you in the years that followed. _

_I have learned that regret is a pointless emotion. Therefore, I simply wish that moving forward, you and I will continue to reconnect. Your warmth and generosity in Chatham quickly dispelled my remaining reservations, and your admission that you, as the Admiral, risked everything to save me means more than I am, as of yet, able to articulate. Thankfully, we are not at the end of our lives, and I hope that in time we will continue to share our true emotions with one another._

_Please do not feel you must reciprocate. However, I would certainly appreciate your response._

_All my best,_

_Seven_

Kathryn took a long sip of her coffee and swallowed, feeling a bit dizzy. She read back over several parts of the letter, her pulse quickening with every word.

"_Perhaps my expectations lead to misperception and disappointment. However, I do not believe I mistook the level of our connection."_

_What expectations? _She thought.

Her heart sank into her stomach as she realized just how much she had underestimated Seven's attachment. Beyond the ex-drone's icy exterior, there had been many more layers of humanity surfacing, sometimes painfully, in ways the blonde clearly hadn't been able to express. Kathryn felt their connection was incredibly deep and certainly important, moreso than it should have been considering she was her subordinate. She risked her entire crew to save the woman's life, a point that had been particularly difficult to explain during the debriefing, and which thankfully, had been sealed from public record by fact that on Seven's end the stakes had been just as high was no less than a revelation.

Then again, there had been plenty of incidents where Seven also risked her life to save the Voyager crew. In particular, Kathryn recalled their attempt to retrieve the transwarp coil from a Borg cube, how Seven had given in to the Queen's demand for her to return to the Collective in exchange for allowing Janeway and the others to go free. Again, Janeway had gone after her, refusing to let go, though looking back, the risk had been equally grave on Seven's part. Suddenly, every tense and terrifying moment of the ordeal felt so much more personal.

"_I did not ever feel I needed space from you."_

_Christ, _she thought.

Regret may be irrelevant, but there was a whole hell of a lot of distance left to amend.

Feeling like she needed to get her thoughts out immediately, Kathryn grabbed the keyboard she kept at her desk and began typing, preferring the written word over dictation.

_Dear Seven,_

_Thank you for your beautifully honest and heartfelt letter. I continue to be struck by just how poignant you've become when sharing your emotions. I hope that doesn't sound patronizing. Given that I've missed the past two decades of your social development, I'm afraid I can only now marvel at the incredible progress you've made, and am indeed thankful for the chance to finally see it._

_Helping you break away from the Borg and regain your humanity was one of the most thrilling and deeply rewarding experiences of my life. Despite the challenges and your initial reluctance, I knew that you would be alright. Better than alright, you have become a success in every area you have set about to conquer, your achievements, both personal and professional, no less than astonishing. You must know how proud of you I have always been, regardless of our differences. The Doctor and I may have assisted you in beginning the journey, but you alone are responsible for the woman you've become._

_I appreciate your apologies regarding our dispute and am thankful you were willing to accept mine. In light of the personal context you've shared, I believe I'm beginning to understand where our communication faltered. I am sorry I couldn't always be the support you needed. There were many times I wish I could have done more, said more, but felt inhibited as Captain. I did not, for instance, feel I could share my own trepidation about re-entering life on Earth, nor the fact that I was going to miss our Voyager family as well. But most of all, I wasn't able to tell you just how much you meant to me, that I found the time we spent together equally fulfilling, that the thought of losing you during those last few days in the Delta Quadrant nearly destroyed me, and certainly dispelled any hesitation I felt about following the Admiral's orders. I'd been able to convince myself until now that we simply grew apart, that our differences were too much to overcome. Thank you for helping me remember the truth. _

_There is much more I could say, however, given that my assistant has been charged with screening my incoming correspondence, perhaps it would be best to find another means of communication. If you are willing to speak via comm signal, face to face, I would very much like to see you again. _

_All my best,_

_Kathryn_

Before she could chicken out, she hit send. Immediately, her stomach began doing flip flops, wondering if Seven would pick apart her words just as she had done. They both seemed very adept-Seven surprisingly so-at keeping things between the lines.

Kathryn practically jumped out of her seat when she heard the console on her desk begin to beep minutes later. She quickly checked her appearance in the window behind her, smoothing down her hair, before straightening her shoulders and pressing the button on the screen.

Seven appeared to be sitting at a desk in her own home, though the lighting was so dim Kathryn could hardly make out much beyond the outline of the blonde, hair hanging loose against shoulders barely covered by the black silk nightgown she wore. Janeway noted how thin the straps were, taut against Seven's skin as they appeared to hold the rest of her in place.

"You don't waste any time, I see," she tried to speak steadily.

"I apologize for contacting you this late," Seven swallowed. "I was unaware you had someone screening your communications."

"It's alright," Kathryn assured her. "Though I'm not sure Lira will be able to survive not having read your entire letter."

"Lira?" Seven questioned. "Your assistant?"

"Yes," Kathryn nodded. "I'm afraid she's terribly enthralled with anything Voyager-related. She's a lovely girl, but she's had to work hard at keeping her enthusiasm at bay."

Seven's cheeks became red as she took a deep breath through her nose and pushed some of her blonde locks behind her ear, revealing more skin.

"Perhaps she is less 'enthralled' with Voyager and more beguiled by your personal affairs."

Janeway gaped at the response, trying not to bite her tongue.

"She's twenty four years old," Kathryn shook her head. "I doubt she's interested in _my_ personal affairs. Besides, what's there to tell?"

"Perhaps nothing," Seven noted. "You yourself admitted it has been 'a long time.'"

Kathryn began to blush. Hard. She was suddenly very glad to be seated.

"For someone who can't hold their liquor, you seem to remember quite a bit."

Seven swallowed.

"You have not engaged in a romantic encounter with anyone since our departure from Voyager," she stated matter-of-factly. "Is that correct?"

The Admiral continued to feel like she'd stumbled into some reality-altering wormhole.

"Yes," she answered plainly.

"Why?"

Kathryn licked her lips, her throat beginning to feel dry.

"Haven't found the right person, I suppose."

Seven's smile was subtle but undeniable. Kathryn's cheeks continued to burn.

"I doubt you called for this," she tried to change the subject. "What's on your mind?"

The blonde shrugged.

"I had no particular intention," Seven admitted. "Besides apologizing for not considering a written communication of such a personal nature may not be wise."

"Thank you again for the letter," she breathed. "I can't tell you how much it means."

"Yours was duly appreciated," Seven nodded. "However, you indicated there was more you wished to say."

Kathryn swallowed, clearing her throat.

"I'm... not sure I can say now...with certainty...exactly what I intended."

Seven rolled her eyes.

"You've become fond of forgetting details."

"Must be my age," Kathryn joked.

"That is what I believe Lieutenant Torres would call 'bullshit.'"

The Admiral's jaw dropped slightly.

"I beg your pardon?"

Seven's eyes continued to sparkle.

"Your age has not affected your ability to perform strenuous tasks, nor to recall numerous stories from our time aboard Voyager," she reminded. "You have also remained exceedingly attractive given you are approaching your mid-sixties."

Kathryn's mouth continued to hang open, feeling as though she was about to ignite.

"Seven, that's...what does that have to do with..."

"Do not attempt to use your age as an excuse for selective memory," the blonde continued.

Kathryn took a deep breath, doing her best to maintain her composure.

"Alright," she breathed. "What would you like me to say?"

Seven glared playfully, though Kathryn knew she was quite serious.

"What you have been unwilling to say thus far."

Now it was Kathryn's turn to raise an eyebrow, anything to slow down the conversation, over which she had completely lost control.

"I'm not the only one who's been holding back," she insisted. "You said in your letter you weren't yet able to articulate everything you wanted to say to me either."

Seven's face glowed red.

"Very well," she sighed. "I simply wished to tell you that what you admitted at the beach house was the most reckless, selfish, beautifully romantic act anyone has ever performed for me, and I doubt it will be topped by anyone else in my lifetime."

Kathryn's eyes watered as she watched the woman before her struggle to make eye contact, far from shy, but still hesitant.

"You risked everything to save me," Seven continued. "Your reputation with Starfleet, the lives of every other member of the crew, including your own, completely disregarding the temporal prime..."

"The temporal prime directive meant nothing," Kathryn whispered. "All that mattered...was you."

Seven froze, save for the soft rise and fall of her breasts as she breathed heavily.

"Was that really so difficult?" she smirked.

Kathryn swallowed, easing a bit as she smiled back at the blonde.

"I think you underestimate just how intimidating you can be," she breathed.

"Intimidating?" Seven questioned. "You, a Starfleet Admiral, after all these years, find…"

"Yes," Kathryn answered. "Especially when you're wearing_ that._"

Seven swallowed.

She looked down at the negligee and appeared to contemplate it for several seconds before returning her gaze to the screen.

"You are intimidated by my sexuality," she offered.

"Not just your sexuality," Kathryn breathed. "Your genius, your valor. The ability you have to cut through the 'bullshit,' as you put it."

Seven continued to move her lips.

"That is...surprising."

"Surprising?" Kathryn snorted. "Imagine, if you will, you're the Captain of a stranded starship, charged with the seemingly impossible task of caring for the wellbeing of a hundred plus individuals while trying against all odds to get them home, when out of completely desperate circumstances, in walks the most infuriatingly brilliant, mesmerizingly gorgeous woman you've ever encountered. She needs you, even if she won't admit it, so you give her every benefit of the doubt, and you're thankful you did because she turns out to be even more amazing than you could have imagined. Slowly, she surpasses the need to be mentored, but becomes more than just another member of the crew. Someone you know you can trust. Someone who, despite her rationality, seems to believe in the story you continue to tell about making it back to Earth. You feel like you've gained her respect, and what's more, her friendship, when suddenly...you realize that may not be enough. You crave her presence, her voice, any chance you're lucky enough to spend a moment alone with her, and you know, deep down, that she's stirred something you've managed to deny within yourself all these years, and you'd give anything, anything, for just one second, to not be Captan, to just be two women who happened to find each other when they needed it most."

Seven's eyes glistened. She bit the inside of her lip and took a deep breath.

"You have no idea how much I've needed to say those things," Kathryn swallowed. "And how sorry I am to have wasted all this time not saying them."

Seven brushed her hair behind her ear once again, bringing her eyes to meet the Admiral's.

"There is no need for further apologies," the blonde sniffed. "We cannot change the past."

The Admiral nodded as they stared at each other for several seconds in silence.

"I wish to be in your presence," Seven finally breathed. "I have craved it as well."

Kathryn felt herself clench in ways she hadn't in years.

"Really," she whispered back, practically speechless.

"When we were in Chatham," Seven continued. "After you helped me recover from the incident on the beach, I felt...an urgency...to be near you. However, I could not act without clear evidence you felt the same way."

Kathryn leaned on her elbows, closer to the screen.

"I hope I've been able to provide all the evidence you need."

Seven swallowed.

"On Voyager...when I began to suspect an attraction, I was less able to decipher signals. Your facial expressions...the way you scanned my body...I had not witnessed those characteristics in other females."

Kathryn sighed.

"Was I really that transparent?"

"Yes," Seven smirked. "Now that I am aware of the intricacies of same-sex flirtation, as well as the full extent of your actions, I believe you have indeed always been 'transparent.' It was simply Starfleet protocol that kept you from acting upon your desire."

Kathryn was beginning to sweat.

"Maybe you're right," she swallowed. "Though... there may have been something about...'not being able to act'... that fueled the attraction in the first place. As an explorer, I've always been... enticed... by the things I'm forbidden to touch."

She dug her nails into her thighs, shocked at her own boldness.

Seven continued to hold her gaze steadily.

"Perhaps it would be best to test that hypothesis," she breathed. "Ensure that you are still…attracted...now that you are, in fact, able to have me."

"God, yes," Kathryn sighed, finally letting go. "More than ever."

Seven glared devilishly.

Before the Admiral could fully comprehend what was happening, the blonde began sliding the straps of her nightgown down her arms.

"We can't do this," Kathryn breathed, practically hyperventilating as she shook her head. "Not here. It pains me to stop you, but there are ways people could track even these communications."

Seven turned beet red as she moved the straps back up her arms.

"Logic appears to be increasingly difficult to maintain in your presence," she sighed.

"I don't think that's a bad thing," Kathryn smiled. "We just need to be careful."

"Understood," Seven swallowed.

"There must be a time we can see each other," Kathryn insisted. "I'll check my schedule."

"Likewise," the blonde spoke firmly. "I cannot wait for Boston."

"Nor can I," Kathryn smirked.

Seven continued to adjust herself.

"Very well," the blonde strained to return to her usual level of stoicism. "I should go."

Kathryn pinched her leg as hard as she could to make sure she was not in fact dreaming.

"Alright," she breathed. "We'll be in touch."

"Yes," Seven smiled softly. "Goodnight."

Kathryn exhaled, sighing audibly once she was alone.

She shook her head before spinning back around to the window behind her desk, watching the shuttles take off from Starfleet, every cell of her body singing with electricity.

Remembering the sound of Seven's voice, she closed her eyes again as she leaned back in her chair, still trying to wake herself from the dream, thanking everything she knew to be sacred.


	13. Chapter 13

**CHAPTER THIRTEEN**

A month passed before they were able to find a date that worked. Seven agreed to come to Indiana for Thanksgiving, the only time she was not caught up in events at the museum or working through the night on a project at the Center for Advanced NanoTechnology. Part of Kathryn wondered if she was delaying on purpose, though somehow she could not fathom even the most developed of ex-drones playing hard to get.

More worrisome than that was the amount of explaining Kathryn knew she'd have to do when she arrived at her mother's house.

"You've gotta be kidding me!" Phoebe gawked. "For twenty years, none of us are so much as able to mention 'she who shall not be named' without you flipping out, and now she's all of a sudden coming to Thanksgiving dinner? What the fuck, Katie?"

"Phoebe," Gretchen shook her head.

"No, seriously," Phoebe laughed. "I know there's more to the story than that. We've been held in the dark all these years, now you've gotta come clean."

"You make it sound like I've been keeping intelligence away from a set of spies," Kathryn arched an eyebrow. "I don't understand why you're under the impression that I owe you anything. We had a chance to talk several months ago and we've been able to resolve our differences. This is the only opportunity we could find to continue catching up."

"On Thanksgiving!?" Phoebe shouted, to her mother's misery. "That's not a time to 'catch up' with an old colleague you happened to run into at a conference, particularly someone you didn't even like."

"I never said I didn't like her," Kathryn corrected. "We were in a different place then."

"Yeah, okay, sis," she mocked. "Sounds more like trying to reunite with a former lover than an ex-Borg."

"Phoebe!" Gretchen scolded more firmly. "Leave her alone. We have more than enough food to go around. Any friend of Katie's is welcome."

"How come you didn't say that when I wanted to bring Bobby Revino to Christmas last year?"

"Because Seven didn't steal your father's snow plow when the garage door was left open like Bobby Revino," Gretchen argued.

Phoebe huffed, crossing her arms as she exited the kitchen. Kathryn rolled her eyes at how immature her sister was for a woman in her fifties.

"Don't worry, Katie," Gretchen spoke softly, putting down the hand mixer as she crossed the room. "We won't ask questions once your friend arrives. Phoebe just needs to get it out of her system."

Kathryn shook her head, laughing it off as best she could.

"You know," Gretchen went on. "I think the last time you brought someone home must have been nearly thirty years ago."

"Yes," Kathryn sighed. "It was Mark's favorite holiday."

"Do you hear from him?"

"Not since the last of our Irish setters had to be put down. Probably six, seven years."

"I was thankful you weren't too torn up by the whole thing," Gretchen noted.

"The man wanted a family," Kathryn shrugged. "For all he knew I was dead and never coming back. I don't blame him."

"Even so," Gretchen continued. "I always wished there was some way for you to be happy too."

Kathryn raised an eyebrow.

"I _am_ happy," she argued. "Really. You don't have to worry about me."

Gretchen patted her on the back before kissing the top of her head.

"Alright," she smiled. "I'm looking forward to meeting this Seven."

Kathryn continued to shake her head as her mother went back to mixing the mashed potatoes.

Just as they were beginning to put everything out on the table, Kathryn excused herself to check her messages, concerned Seven had not yet shown up. After pulling the pad from her pocket, she swallowed hard. She had indeed received a message.

_Kathryn,_

_I deeply regret that I will not be able to attend dinner with your family. Please send my apologies to them and know that I will do my best to find another date for us to meet as soon as possible._

_All my best,_

_Seven_

Despite being notorious for cancelling dates with people at the last minute, Kathryn couldn't stop her blood from beginning to boil.

She took a very deep breath and returned the pad to her pocket before joining her mother, sister, and a few other relatives at the table.

"Seven better hurry if she wants cranberry sauce," Gretchen leaned close to Kathryn. "Once Uncle Joe gets to it, there won't be any left."

Kathryn poured herself a full glass of Cabernet Sauvignon.

"She isn't coming," she practically whispered.

"Wow, seriously?" Phoebe blurted out. "That doesn't bode well for..."

"Phoebe, shush!" Gretchen interjected.

"It's alright, mother," Kathryn did her best to smile. "Phoebe can't help herself. Turns out, there's just no hope for some people."

Something about the sadness in Kathryn's voice silenced even Phoebe.

Gretchen resumed passing her famous dishes around the table, and the family commenced eating without too many additional antics.

Kathryn sat in her favorite leather recliner near the fireplace, the one that had been her father's. She ran her finger around the rim of her glass, hoping to soak in the remnants of whiskey left there, afraid to take another sip. The others gone for the evening, her mother and sister sat on the sofa folding linens and dishing neighborhood gossip. The Admiral wasn't sure how much more she could stomach.

"Katie, you remember Missy Figgins? The one with the dog who always humped everyone's leg?"

Kathryn pulled a blanket across her shoulders.

"No, but by all means, refresh my memory."

She sat through several more rounds of the rumor mill before she felt herself revving up to an outburst.

"If you'll excuse me, I think I've heard enough about Timmy Davis' erectile dysfunction for one evening," Kathryn sighed, pushing herself up off the armchair, gripping the mantle for support.

"You're no fun, sis," Phoebe continued. "Maybe you'd have more friends if you lightened up."

Kathryn glared at her sister as best she could, trying to muster all of the resentment and frustration she had stored up against her for years. She loved her, but for some reason, the two could never manage to stay out of each other's hair.

"Goodnight," she seethed, turning towards the stairs and making her way up to her room.

Once inside, she closed the door and leaned back against it, closing her eyes for a moment, hoping it would stop the room from spinning. Momentarily relieved, she swung herself over to the bed where she fell against the soft, slightly musty quilt Grandmother Janeway had sewn together for her sixteenth birthday. Breathing in the scent of warmer memories, she tried not to think about Seven and the shockingly brief message with no explanation as to why she had cancelled their plans.

_Get a grip_, she told herself. _ It's not as if you're in a relationship, for Christ's sake._

She had opened herself up for this disappointment by becoming hopeful that maybe, just maybe, all of the feelings she'd suppressed for ages weren't crazy. Now, she felt like a sad, beyond-middle-aged woman, fantasizing about the younger blonde who had always been coveted by nearly everyone in their circle. For once she could sympathize with how the Doctor must have felt all those years ago, thinking he had a chance with someone who clearly felt she was out of his league.

And yet, she knew she hadn't imagined things. That woman, whom she desperately wanted not to care for right now, had pushed and prodded and practically forced Kathryn to admit the way she felt. There was no denying that, nor her more than sensuous reaction, which had stimulated carnal intimations in both of them.

_No_, she thought. _I refuse to put myself out on the line after all these years only to be cut down so easily._

Against all of her better judgement, the vast amount of which the whiskey she'd consumed had decimated, she pulled her portable communications screen from her suitcase, set it up on the nightstand, and pressed the few buttons needed to call Seven.

The blonde did not pick up as quickly as Kathryn had hoped, adding to her mounting aggravation.

Finally, Seven's face did appear. She wore her grey silk robe, her hair thoroughly out of place.

"There you are," Kathryn mused.

"It is nearing 1300 hours," Seven spoke slowly, trying not to sound agitated. "Are you alright?"

"Fine. Perfectly fine," Kathryn snarked. "Sorry to wake you. I just thought, given your rather terse message and the complete and utter lack of details, you in fact might not be 'alright.'"

Seven blinked a few times as she attempted to open her eyes wider, pushing her hair into a messy updo, golden strands framing her face perfectly, even for someone who had just been woken abruptly.

Kathryn tensed her jaw as she waited for a response.

"I apologize for my absence," Seven offered. "There were circumstances beyond my control."

Kathryn laughed softly.

"I can't count the number of times I've used that line."

Seven raised an eyebrow.

"It was not intended as a 'line,' Kathryn," Seven ensured. "I was called to a meeting I was required to attend."

"On Thanksgiving?"

The Admiral felt a little sick as she realized she sounded like Phoebe.

"Yes," Seven replied more firmly.

"Well," Kathryn breathed, trying not to yawn despite her anger. "It must have been important."

Seven scowled, silently watching the woman before her.

"You are intoxicated."

"Yes," Kathryn smirked, raising her empty glass. "It's a Janeway holiday tradition."

"Holidays..." Seven swallowed. "Are important to you."

Kathryn did not answer, brushing off her assertions.

"For the past several years, I have worked through the holidays," Seven admitted. "Before my separation from Chakotay, I rarely attend his family's festivities. My remaining relatives are much older, less inclined to celebrate. Perhaps I underestimated the significance they would hold for you."

"It's fine," Kathryn continued to insist, though not convincingly. "I just wanted to make sure you weren't...alone."

"Are you alone?" Seven asked.

Taken aback, Kathryn looked over her shoulder.

"Presently, yes."

Seven swallowed.

"If I provide you with more details about the meeting that took place tonight, can I trust you will not share the information with Starfleet?"

"Really?" Kathryn tried not to snort. "You have information that's classified _from_ Starfleet? Seriously, Seven, I don't need an explanation. If you…"

"Please," the blonde spoke through her teeth.

Kathryn was caught off guard by her tone, but given the blonde rarely used that word, became a bit nervous.

"I'm all ears," she swallowed.

Seven took a deep breath before continuing.

"The Center has been made aware of two disabled Borg vessels traveling closely outside Earth's orbit."

Kathryn froze. Her skin flushed.

She had not encountered the Borg since that fateful day she'd brought her ship home. Thankfully, the intense blow the Admiral brought down upon the Collective drove them further from the Alpha Quadrant in the years since, apparently until now.

"We believe we may have an opportunity to salvage data from the vessels," Seven continued.

Kathryn sighed.

"You know as well as I do how dangerous..."

"Yes," Seven acknowledged. "However, given the significant developments in defense mechanisms we've constructed, we are confident it will not be as daunting an endeavor as it once was."

"Are you really willing to risk another run-in with the Queen after all these years?" she felt herself growing protective. "Who's to say she won't be able to tap into your cranial receiver like the last time?"

"That is a risk I am willing to take," Seven swallowed. "However, I do not believe it is plausible. As far as we know, the Borg have not resurrected the Queen in the same capacity."

Kathryn bit her lip, forgetting all about Seven's dinner cancellation, suddenly feeling like she was right back in the Delta Quadrant, faced with the horror of losing her all over again.

"There is another reason why I wish to attempt this mission," Seven continued.

"Oh?"

"There are many drones who are disconnected from the Collective aboard the cubes," she went on. "I believe with the progress I have made in my own personal development, along with the Center's advanced anti-assimilation technology, we may be able to give thousands of drones the chance to return to life as individuals. As I mentioned in my letter, I have longed for the opportunity to help others as you once helped me."

Kathryn was truly stunned by the prospect, though she remained highly skeptical.

"That's all well and good," she sighed. "But do you really think Starfleet would allow your Center to engage the Borg without their permission?"

Seven exhaled through her nose. She looked away for a moment before returning her gaze to the screen.

"Starfleet is already aware of this mission," she swallowed.

Kathryn felt the room begin to spin again.

"Really?" she breathed. "Then why have I not been made aware of it?"

"Because they have deliberately kept it from you," Seven admitted.

Kathryn thought the Earth might crack open and swallow her whole.

"I don't understand."

"Starfleet contacted me shortly before the conference in Boston," Seven explained. "I was, of course, more than hesitant to consider working with them, given the amount of red tape they have always erected when the Center has tried collaborating in the past. I prefer to keep my distance while providing research that may be of use. However, due to the nature of this mission, I felt I could not refuse. When I asked Starfleet why you were not involved, they told me they did not believe you would be able to remain objective during an encounter with the Borg, particularly... if I was involved."

It took Kathryn several seconds to process that information.

"How ironic," she spoke softly. "To think... I used to doubt _your_ ability to remain objective. Suddenly, _I'm_ the one who can't be trusted?"

Seven bore into the Admiral with her eyes, trying to appear sympathetic.

"Given everything you have shared with me recently, I believe I now understand why Starfleet has their reservations."

Kathryn could have melted steel with her glare.

"Who the hell are they to decide what I can and can't handle?" she seethed. "I've given them forty years, my entire career, not to mention the personal sacrifices. Now they feel it's appropriate to judge my ability to make decisions?"

Seven swallowed.

"You have not always decided in ways they would deem 'appropriate.'"

Kathryn realized she was referring to her rescue, to the brazen, and yes, incredibly questionable tactics she'd used to bring Voyager home.

"So much for 'beautifully romantic.'"

"I understand why you would be resentful of their actions," Seven told her. "However, I did not know you and I would become...close…again when I agreed to work with them under these terms."

"You could have told me," Kathryn breathed.

"I _am_ telling you," Seven insisted. "Before now, I did not feel I had sufficient information, nor did I know with certainty I could trust you not to betray my confidence. Now, I feel it necessary to share this information based upon my desire to explore our relationship further."

Kathryn rolled her eyes.

"Are we seriously talking about 'our relationship?'" she asked. "We've only just begun speaking again. We can't even agree on a time to see each other, let alone consider anything more. And now, you're telling me you might be putting yourself in one of the most dangerous situations I can possibly fathom?"

"That is precisely why I have not told you," Seven raised her voice. "For fear you would try to stop me."

"Please," Kathryn bit back. "Forget about me, you really think Starfleet will let you back out now?"

"I do not wish to 'back out,'" Seven argued. "It is my decision, not theirs."

"Fine," Kathryn sighed. "Go, throw yourself back into the fire, if that's what you…"

"Kathryn," Seven took a deep breath. "I am sorry that you are hurt, but please know my involvement does not change the way I feel about you. I am still uncertain whether or not I will be on the away team. Given my expertise, it is likely. However, Starfleet has also offered me the opportunity to relocate to San Francisco to continue working with the drones once they have been transported back to Earth. My reservations about taking the offer are significant, however, I find myself considering it now more than ever, in part because I wish to be near you. At the same time, the idea of having Starfleet dictate my actions, having any amount of access to my personal life, is incredibly unappealing."

Kathryn felt herself softening a bit, despite her ire.

"In tonight's meeting, your involvement was brought up once again," Seven swallowed. "Considering your own expertise with the Borg, including your ability to negotiate with drones that have been separated from the Collective, several people have reconsidered bringing you on board after the initial retrieval is complete. If that is the case...and I do decide to take the job from Starfleet...you would once again be my superior."

Kathryn's mouth opened slightly, though no words came out. The various emotions flowing through her made her feel insane, but ringing out above all was the sudden realization that this was not about Seven betraying her, nor her own ego in the face of being shut out by Starfleet. It was really about Seven's fear that after all this time and all of the walls they had brought down between them, Kathryn would once again distance herself.

"I see," she breathed. "That would make things more...complicated."

"I do not wish for things to be complicated," Seven insisted.

Kathryn leaned against the nightstand.

"Well...if I've learned anything from your 'New Age' philosophy, it's that the only time we really have... is now."

Seven swallowed, breathing hard.

"I do wish you could have made it tonight," Kathryn whispered, feeling her resolve crumble. "I'd give anything...for you to be here...now."

Seven continued to stare at Kathryn, appearing just as anxious as the Admiral felt.

"Very well," she whispered back.

Before Kathryn knew what was happening, she watched Seven rise from her desk and disappear into the darkness behind her. She could tell they were still connected by the sounds of several buttons being pushed in the background. Just as she was starting to fear the blonde had intended to hang up, the lights of a transporter beam slowly materialized across the room, and Seven was there.

Kathryn's heart pounded fiercely in her ears as she rose to her feet.

"How did you…"

"I bypassed the security codes for the Center's mobile transporter," Seven whispered as she crossed the room.

"That's…"

Seven dropped her robe as she stood in front of the Admiral, revealing the black nightgown Kathryn hadn't been able to get out of her mind.

"You…" Kathryn tried not to stutter.

Seven smirked as she gently pushed the older woman's shoulders, allowing her to fall back rather easily onto the bed. Carefully, she placed her knees on either side of the Admiral's body, lowering gently into her lap.

Kathryn swallowed hard, eyelids fluttering as she slid her hands up Seven's back until they comfortably wrapped behind her. She held on tight, her eyes locked on blonde's pulse rapidly racing through the vein in her neck, skin shivering slightly from the cold.

Trailing her gaze up to Seven's face, looking into deep pools of cobalt, she couldn't stop herself from bringing her fingers to the few blonde locks strewn against her cheek, pushing them back. Her fingertips grazed the implant just in front of Seven's ear, the silver, star-like structure sparkling even in the dim light. She brought her eyes back to Seven's again just as the blonde's lids dropped and she leaned forward.

Seven kissed her more deeply, forcefully then she could have possibly ever been ready for. The blonde breathed heavily, bringing her hands to the Admiral's cheeks, holding them as she brushed her generous, swollen lips across Kathryn's, pulling her face closer, hungrily searching for more. She wasted no time coaxing Kathryn's mouth open with her tongue, to which the Admiral immediately granted access, and the blonde continued lapping feverishly, sliding inside Kathryn's mouth against her own starved, searching tongue.

Kathryn couldn't stop the tiniest of moan from emanating deep within her throat as she did her best to reciprocate. She pulled back enough to suck the blonde's bottom lip, the one she had been eyeing for nearly thirty years. Opening her eyes momentarily, she found Seven also watching. Kathryn defiantly bit into the flesh caught between her teeth, and Seven smirked before pushing her back down against the bed again, finally coming up for air while hovering above the Admiral.

"You..." Kathryn whispered, panting hard. "Are every bit as heavenly...more…"

Seven leaned close to her ear.

"Forgive my absence," she whispered heavily.

Kathryn pulled the blonde tighter against her chest, nuzzling the side of her face, gasping when she felt Seven's teeth nip her lobe.

"Yes," she breathed.

Once again, she pushed up on her elbows, grasping at the sides of Seven's body as the blonde straddled her, chest heaving against her own, hair falling down around her shoulders.

Seven grabbed Kathryn's hands, balancing expertly as she brought them to her neck. Slowly, she slid them down her chest, stopping just short of her cleavage, letting go as she watched Kathryn intently, daring her to continue.

Kathryn swallowed, gathering her confidence.

She allowed her fingertips to trace Seven's deliciously soft skin, the ample rise and curve as she trailed them down across the top hem of her negligee. Seven leaned her forehead against Kathryn's, begging the Admiral for more just with the movement of her body. Finally, Kathryn brought her palms down across the silk, gripping as much of the younger woman's breasts as she could. Seven's skin erupted into goosebumps.

"Kathryn…" she whispered.

The Admiral brought her lips back to Seven's mouth and kissed her all the more intensely. The blonde wrapped her legs around Kathryn tighter, bringing her hands to the hem of her linen pants, sliding them up under her blouse and palming her warm abdomen, tracing the line of skin just beneath her belly button.

"Ah," Kathryn shivered, disengaging from the blonde's lips as she struggled not to laugh.

"You are ticklish," Seven mused.

"Apparently," she breathed. "But...please...don't..."

Seven kissed her hard, moving her hands up further beneath Kathryn's blouse, continuing to trace her skin. Kathryn shivered again.

"I cannot stay," Seven finally whispered.

Kathryn grabbed Seven's wrists, resting them against her thighs as she pulled back.

"Why?" she scowled.

"I must prepare for another meeting tomorrow morning."

Kathryn rolled her eyes.

"They won't miss you more than I will, I can assure you," she growled.

Seven smirked.

"You yourself said we must be careful."

"I suppose," Kathryn sighed, kissing the blonde's shoulder before bringing their noses together. "Thank you. I still...can't believe this is even happening, but...thank you."

Seven kissed her again reassuringly before slowly pulling them both to their feet.

"I will return soon," Seven swallowed. "If you believe your family will have me."

"Oh they'll have you," Kathryn insisted. "I don't know how well you'll enjoy them, but…"

"Katie!" Phoebe shouted from downstairs. "Ma and I need your help fixing the dishwasher!"

Kathryn sighed, shaking her head.

"Speak of the devils."

Seven's cheeks turned pink as she smiled.

"'No worries,'" she repeated the Admiral's words once again.

Kathryn brought her hand up to Seven's cheek once more, rubbing the soft skin with her thumb. She leaned in for another kiss.

"I guess I'll hear from Starfleet sooner or later," she whispered. "Until then... I promise not to say anything."

Seven nodded.

"I will speak with you tomorrow evening," she told her.

Kathryn agreed. She painfully let go of the blonde so she could step back and prepare for transport.

Seven bent down and picked up her robe, and from the pocket pulled out a small device, pushing a few buttons.

"Goodnight, 'Katie,'" Seven smirked as she dematerialized.

Kathryn fell back against the bed. The room was still spinning, but this time, she didn't mind.


	14. Chapter 14

**CHAPTER FOURTEEN**

The next day, Starfleet called Kathryn with a change of plans. She was requested to return to San Francisco for a few days so she could be debriefed on a new collaboration with the Center for Advanced NanoTechnology led by Seven Hansen. Before making her way to headquarters, she changed into her Admiral's uniform, feeling the need to present herself with the authority and respect she knew she deserved.

Upon entering the conference room, she was greeted by several other Admirals, including Admiral Stark, who shook her hand firmly as he led her to a seat next to him at the head of the table. Across from her, Seven sat reviewing data. It took her several moments to look up, but when she did, she smiled softly before standing.

"Admiral," she greeted Kathryn professionally.

"Ms. Hansen," Kathryn replied, keeping her voice steady. "Good to see you."

Seven nodded before taking her seat. She looked up again a few minutes later, locking eyes with the Admiral, doing her best to communicate so much without words.

The meeting commenced as Admiral Stark reviewed the information Seven had already shared privately. However, now that Kathryn was sober and not distracted by the half-dressed blonde teasing her from miles away, she had a few more questions.

"Where do we think these cubes came from?" she asked.

Stark sighed, clearly ready to stave off the Admiral's skepticism.

"We aren't certain," he told her flatly. "We've scanned the entire quadrant for signs of a worm hole or some other subspace anomaly that may have led them here, but so far nothing has turned up."

"Maybe what we're looking for isn't a natural phenomenon," Kathryn offered. "Perhaps the Borg opened a corridor undetectable by Starfleet technology, and now, they're sitting back, waiting for us to take the bait before opening another."

"Why would the Borg provide such a deception?" Seven interjected. "If they have developed the means necessary to attack Earth, I believe they would have already done so."

"Because maybe they're not interested in attacking Earth," Janeway mused. "Maybe they're after something more specific."

Seven swallowed. She glanced up at Admiral Stark, who was keenly watching them both.

"All we know is that we have two Borg vessels in our space, and we can't very well let them sit there in orbit without investigating further," he declared. "Ms. Hansen has offered her expertise in retrieving data from the ships, and what's more, bringing back the disabled drones in order to return them to their lives as humanoids. We simply cannot allow this opportunity to pass us by because…"

"Because you don't know enough?" Kathryn glared at him harshly. "Really, why did you call me here if you weren't the least bit concerned that something could go wrong? I get that you think I'd be able to help with the drones once you've taken them, but you've got Seven for that. Truth be told, I'm the only Starfleet officer besides Jean Luc Picard and the android Data to confront the Borg Queen or destroy a Borg vessel from the inside. If you don't want my opinion…"

"We don't," Stark shot back. "Admiral, this mission is going forward with or without you. All we're asking is for your help in making the program a success, and yes, dampening the possibility of any casualties. If you're not willing to help us, then…"

"No," Kathryn interrupted again, though her voice was softer as she tried to bring things back to order. "I'll help. Under one condition."

"Yes?" Stark urged her to continue.

"Allow me to go with Ms. Hansen on the away mission," she spoke as calmly as she could.

"Together, we are more likely to overcome any difficulties, given we've both been inside Borg vessels before."

"That's not an option," Stark scowled. "And you know why."

Kathryn breathed heavily through her nose. She knew exactly what she was getting herself into, and she didn't care if everything she'd had to reveal during the debriefing got rehashed.

"Then no one should go," she argued.

"That is not your decision to make," Seven finally spoke, glaring at Kathryn across the table. "There are several members of my team, myself included, who are more than capable…"

"I never said you weren't capable," Kathryn interrupted again. "It's not about being capable. There has to be a way to do this without risking any more lives. Starfleet has developed thousands of new feats of engineering in the past twenty years. Don't tell me the only way to get what we want out of those cubes is to send people up there to bring it back."

"Are you suggesting we use some form of artificial intelligence to complete the mission?" Seven asked. "Holograms, androids?"

"No," Kathryn continued. "Something much more primitive than that, something that doesn't have a life of its own, something that is simply a machine without any personality algorithms or subroutines added."

"Like the twentieth century Mars Rover," Admiral Lewis, whose background was in engineering, spoke up. "Starfleet hasn't used that kind of technology in years."

"Well, sometimes less is more," Kathryn argued. "It's like the time my mother bought an electric can opener. The damn thing broke the second time she tried to use it, but that trusty antique hand-held never let her down."

Several of the Admiral's chuckled. Seven did not. Kathryn took notice.

"All I'm asking," she started again. "Is that we consider saving these drones, along with whatever data is salvageable, by using some 'drones' of our own."

"I had not considered that possibility," Stark admitted. "Ms. Hansen, what do you think?"

Seven looked up at Admiral Stark and then back to the data in her pad before placing it on the desk before her. She took a few breaths before bringing her eyes to Janeway. Kathryn swallowed, instinctually bracing for another round of debate.

"Perhaps this plan would work," she offered. "However, considering we may only get one opportunity to enter the cubes, lest the Borg return to reclaim their vessels, we may not wish to rely on machines that cannot think or judge as we do. I myself have intelligence and experience unmatched by anyone in Starfleet regarding the Borg, let alone an inanimate object. I am less inclined to rely on outdated technology for a mission I believe is about more than simply adding to the reserve of information Starfleet has retained on the Borg. This is our greatest chance at saving the lives of thousands of drones whose lives were taken away from them."

"We can develop technology that incorporates your own wealth of knowledge," Admiral Lewis spoke again. "If you allow us to download your expertise, we can…"

"We may not have time," Seven insisted, trying to remain calm. "Besides not knowing whether the Borg will return for their ships, every second the drones remain disconnected from the Collective without our support adds an additional barrier to their recovery."

"I'd rather take the time to develop a foolproof plan before doing anything," Stark weighed in.

Seven wanted to keep arguing her point, but as she looked up at Kathryn, realized the older woman had drifted off somewhere, a mixture of panic and deep contemplation painting her face in ways that made Seven dizzy. Finally, the Admiral turned towards her, feeling those blue eyes penetrating her reverie. She smiled ever so subtly, unable to hide the worry she bore in the face of losing Seven to the same forces she had risked her life and career for in the past.

"Very well," Seven swallowed. "Proceed with assembling a team of engineers from Starfleet. I will provide my own staff as well as personally oversee the attempts to construct the drone."

"Maybe we ought to call it something else," Stark offered. "We don't want to raise any red flags about Starfleet getting into the assimilation business."

Everyone laughed, except Janeway and Seven.

"Please, Jeffrey," Kathryn rolled her eyes. "If that's what you're worried about, we've got bigger problems."

Stark blushed, always flustered by Janeway's success in getting the last word.

"Alright," he grumbled. "We'll meet back at 0800 with the team assembled. Dismissed."

Kathryn stood slowly, exchanging pleasantries with the other Admiral's, shaking Stark's hand, before meeting Seven down in the lobby.

"You have my address," she whispered, making sure no one else was in earshot.

"Yes," Seven answered, appearing to be a bit perturbed by the meeting, but thankfully not backing out of their plans.

"Good," Kathryn swallowed. "See you there."


	15. Chapter 15

**CHAPTER FIFTEEN**

By eight thirty, enough time had passed for Seven to make her way to Kathryn's home inconspicuously. The Admiral had to remember to keep breathing when she finally heard the doorbell ring. She did her best to keep the butterflies under control as she opened the door, taking in the view of the blonde, standing there with a few snow flurries still glistening against her, looking just as nervous.

"Come in," she quickly ushered her inside.

Seven stepped into the bright, contemporary loft, decked out in several paintings from collections dating back to the Renaissance, sculptures taken directly from Maestro Da Vinci's workshop, as well as a few works Phoebe had painted. She observed her surroundings for a moment before discarding her heavy red pea coat, revealing a tight black dress similar to the one she wore to the conference, only lower cut and topped with a string of amber beads that danced delicately across her chest.

"Thank you," Kathryn swallowed as she took the bottle of Bordeaux Seven handed her. "I hope you don't mind me replicating something for us. There wasn't time to prepare a five-star menu."

"That will be sufficient," Seven breathed, following the Admiral into the living space, taking a seat at the bar overlooking the kitchen.

Kathryn grimaced at Seven's tone. Clearly, the meeting at Starfleet was still under her skin.

Uncorking the bottle, Kathryn poured herself a glass.

"Will you be partaking this evening?" she asked.

"No," Seven told her flatly. "I prefer to remain unaffected. For now."

"Alright," Kathryn sighed, taking a sip, smoothing out her white linen frock before leaning back against the counter. "Let's get this over with, shall we? You're angry because I offered a suggestion that will delay your mission."

Seven raised an eyebrow at the accusation.

"I am not angry," she breathed. "Concerned, agitated, yes."

Kathryn rolled her eyes.

"Either way, you're upset because I gave valid reasons for why constructing a device to retrieve the drones remotely is preferable."

Seven appeared to be doing everything in her power to remain calm, but was clearly failing. She bit the inside of her lip, a quirk Kathryn found quite adorable, but wouldn't dare mention under these circumstances.

"We may miss an opportunity to save lives because of an unnecessary penchant for precaution," she exhaled sharply. "A trait you seem to have adopted as of late."

Kathryn smirked, shaking her head.

"Comparing my prior actions to the present scenario won't work," she insisted. "Say what you will, but those variables were far less volatile than what we're faced with now. I knew exactly what I was getting myself into. You, on the other hand, have no idea why these cubes are here, unless you really think the Borg have decided to use the Alpha Quadrant as some sort of garbage dump."

Seven's cheeks burned red as she looked away.

"This is precisely the sort of control I feared would occur working with Starfleet," she sighed. "Particularly, if you became involved."

Kathryn tried not to choke on her wine.

She glared at Seven quite seriously, putting her glass down on the counter and her hands flat against the marble, leaning a bit closer.

"I thought I'd made this clear," she whispered. "But it's worth repeating. I have no desire to control you, Seven. Even on Voyager, we only operated under the illusion of control. You have always been free to make your own choices, and you are free to do so now."

Seven held her gaze, breathing steadily.

"Had you considered I might prefer to go on the away mission?" she swallowed. "You yourself have repeatedly expressed the importance of your identity as an explorer. I believed you would understand my own need to..."

"I get it," Kathryn cut her off. "Trust me, I do. But this isn't just about exploration. Exploration is one thing. Putting yourself in danger because you feel the need to prove something, or worse, rectify something that can't be undone, is another."

Seven continued to breathe heavily, her cheeks glowing steadily pink as she shifted.

"I think you're still trying to rid yourself of the guilt you harbor from your time as Borg," Kathryn continued. "I think...you have no idea...just how much of an impact you've already made."

Seven finally looked at her again, eyes fierce.

"I have done nothing to make up for the lives I helped destroy," the blonde spoke through her teeth.

"How can you say that?" Kathryn continued to whisper, daring to lean closer, eyes searching the blonde's face for understanding. "What about Icheb and the others, not to mention your own example? Do you really think Starfleet would have even considered rescuing drones before you arrived? They would have fired a few warheads into space and said to hell with it. "

"Until I have established this program, I have not done enough."

"Look," Kathryn sighed. "I can't imagine how you feel, and I won't pretend to. You've done all this work at connecting with your emotions, it's no doubt you feel an immeasurable amount of remorse, especially with how spiritual you've become. No matter what happens, you've gone above and beyond what anyone could have ever expected an ex-drone to accomplish, including helping Starfleet understand the issues here as far from black and white. I have absolute faith that you will achieve your dream of somehow making this program a reality."

"Then why have you insisted on slowing down the process?" Seven breathed. "If you believe I am capable, why not trust that I can do this on my own? Unless you feel the need to 'prove' something to Starfleet as well."

Kathryn froze. She pulled back, shaking her head incredulously.

"I'm retired, Seven," she spoke deeply. "I haven't been involved in an active mission for months, and I have no desire to return to that life, let alone attempt to prove anything. It's too late for that now. Am I disappointed Starfleet doesn't trust me as much as I would have hoped? Yes. But truth be told, I wouldn't have even joined this project if it weren't for you."

"Because you do not believe I can handle it on my own," Seven seethed.

"No, because I love you!" Kathryn practically shouted, her voice shaking even as it threatened to break. "Because I don't think I could survive losing you again after I've only just gotten you back."

Seven's lips parted at the admission, her cheeks on fire as she continued to breath.

"I have absolutely no intention of stopping you, but I'll be damned if I don't do everything in my power to help you do this as efficiently and safely as possible," Kathryn swallowed, holding back tears. "If you can't see that, then I've failed at everything I believe my former self tried to prove with her ridiculously, and thank god, insanely narrow-minded actions, because that love she spoke about? The one you told me so many years ago you thought she meant was Chakotay's? That's the same love I feel for you now, and that's the only reason, my only motive, for getting involved. So please, don't tell me…"

Kathryn's words were swallowed as Seven lunged forward, kissing her hard, melting against her lips as the tension fell from her shoulders. Kathryn finally reached out and grabbed Seven, pulling her off the barstool, wrapping herself around her as tightly as she could. Her hands went to the blonde's neck, searching every bit of exposed skin as she continued greedily sucking in Seven's lips while allowing Seven to push her back against the nearest wall, head hitting the cement just enough to rattle the paintings hanging neatly in their frames.

Kathryn gasped for breath as Seven pulled back. The blonde laced her fingers between Kathryn's, slowing sliding their hands up the wall, holding them above Kathryn's head as she leaned forward again, kissing her jaw, her chin, before looking back into her eyes.

"You believe me now," Kathryn panted. "Don't you?"

Seven opened her mouth to speak, but instead smirked as she brought her lips back to Kathryn's, kissing her ever so softly, sweetly, gently brushing over them again and again, rather than saying another word. Kathryn shifted a bit as Seven brought their bodies together, pressing the full length of her tall, slender form against the Admiral's smaller frame, keeping her hands trapped firmly above them. Kathryn flexed her knuckles, scraping them against the paint as she tried to get free, needing badly to touch Seven, but instead only able to use her lips. She ran her tongue along the bottom edge of the blonde's generous pout before slipping inside her mouth, teeth clashing as they both scrambled for more.

Finally, Kathryn used all of her strength to push them off the wall and back against the kitchen counter, taking the opportunity to free her hands, wrapping them around Seven's back, scratching gently across the black fabric of her tight dress as she buried her face in her neck and began to suck. Seven dug her nails into Kathryn's shoulders as her breath caught, feet threatening to slip out from beneath her.

"Please," she whispered as the Admiral smothered her neck with kisses and licks, trying to find just the right spot to send the ex-Borg over the edge.

Kathryn brought her mouth to the blonde's ear, sucking in her lobe before biting softly.

"What can I…"

Seven grabbed her hands again, but this time, slid them down her body, stopping at the hem of her dress. Kathryn pulled back, looking deep into the younger woman's eyes, swallowing as she noted the craven, desperate look on her face, fearing for the first time she may not be able to give her what she needed.

"I..." Kathryn began raspily. "I've never…"

"It does not matter," Seven swallowed, bringing their noses together.

"Yes, but...have you?"

Seven pulled back for a moment, raising an eyebrow slightly as she took a deep breath.

"Yes."

Kathryn felt her face, including her neck, scald with heat as she took in that information.

"Oh," she swallowed.

"Over the past several years," Seven breathed. "I have felt the need to explore my...desire for female intimacy."

"I see," Kathryn tried to remain steady. "And were you...serious...about any of these women, or…"

"Do you really wish for me to recount my sexual history?" the blonde sighed. "Suffice it to say, I have not been with anyone that I care passionately about for many years, let alone someone I… love...as well."

Kathryn's mouth opened slightly. She swallowed back her hesitations, eyes glistening to fullness as she leaned close again, burying her lips amidst Seven's. As she pulled back to face her, she brought the blonde's hands up to her mouth, kissing both of them before letting go, sliding her own hands back down the length of the blonde's body, stopping just above the knee, once again at the hem of her dress.

She looked up at Seven as she slowly slid her hands back up, bringing the fabric with her.

"Computer," Kathryn spoke firmly, eyes continually fixed on Seven's. "Lights off."

The entire place went dark. Neither of them moved for a moment as their eyes adjusted, though the loft was still lit by the lights from Starfleet headquarters and other buildings shimmering far across the Bay. They were alone, far from the eyes and ears of anyone interested in making this into a violation of protocol, or worse, another story for the tabloids. Finally, they were just two people who needed now, more than ever, to be able to touch each other without any interference from the powers that be.

Kathryn continued moving her hands up Seven's body, swallowing hard as she lifted past her abdomen, over incredibly round, swollen breasts, and as Seven lifted her arms, finally over her head, tossing the garment to the floor.

As she looked down between them, Kathryn realized just how heavily Seven was breathing, her whole body moving with the rhythm of her anticipation. Soft tremors crept from her delicate, bare toes, through intensely muscular calves and thighs, across her lower stomach and through abs that defied age, certainly through breasts that heaved up and down slowly as she inhaled and exhaled fully, the strained tendons of her neck, and finally, her almost pained facial expression as she again threw herself into Kathryn's body.

Kathryn found herself being pushed back further this time, through her silent, spacious apartment into the living room, where Seven found a sofa large enough for the two of them and gently coaxed Kathryn into a horizontal position. The Admiral allowed herself to be mounted, Seven's nearly naked body hovering above her once again, just like in Indiana, only this time knowing full well she wasn't about to disappear.

Her own chest throbbed against her linen dress-shirt as she tried to process all that was happening, as Seven's hands reached down between them and pulled at the garment, lifting it and her body expertly as she removed it, tossing it somewhere behind the couch.

Seven slowly lowered herself onto Kathryn's now equally undressed form, eating up the vision with her own glimmering blue eyes, taking in how toned and strongly sexy the older woman remained after all this time, eyes coming to rest on her shoulder. Kathryn swallowed as she recognized an almost starved, heathen look on Seven's face before the blonde brought her mouth to the right shoulder and bit down harshly, though she softened the blow with kisses and licks, followed by more desperate, dedicated gnawing.

"Aaah," Kathryn moaned, shifting her hips up against Seven's thighs as the blonde continued to nibble. "What are you…"

"I have always admired your shoulders," Seven swallowed, breathing heavily, before kissing the skin on her arm once more, then returning to Kathryn's mouth, lapping hungrily for several moments, before pulling back again.

"I had no idea," Kathryn smirked, a little impressed with herself.

Seven traced her fingers around the frame of Kathryn's face, pushing her short, sweaty hair back and away from her forehead. She trailed them down to the Admiral's mouth, and Kathryn couldn't help but suck them inside, allowing her tongue to slide up and down the shaft of each digit as she writhed beneath the blonde, who had begun gently rocking back and forth against her pelvis. Seven pulled her hand from Kathryn's mouth and brought them both to the woman's bra straps, which she slid down the Admiral's arms before reaching behind her back and undoing the clasp. For a moment, she thought she felt Kathryn stop breathing, and pulled back to check in before moving forward. Kathryn's face did indeed look concerned.

"Please," Seven whispered. "Trust me."

"I do," Kathryn assured her, reaching up to the blonde's face. "It's just...it's been such a long time...since anyone's..."

Seven leaned down again, smoothing her hands across Kathryn's chest, just over her heart, almost as softly and barely there as when she performed Reiki on her back at the beach house.

"You are beautiful, Kathryn," Seven breathed. "Just as you were when I met you. Even more so now that you have shown me more of who you are."

Kathryn didn't want to cry. She had never cried during sex, and she didn't want Seven to think anything was wrong. Truthfully, nothing, in her entire life, had ever felt so right. She couldn't stop from letting out the smallest of sobs, which she fought back, taking a deep breath as she smiled up at the blonde through tears.

Seven kissed her again softly before moving her hands back to Kathryn's chest, removing the bra and discarding it, looking down at breasts smaller than her own, but just as round, only slightly affected by gravity. She met them with her fingers, sprawling them out across each breast, massaging gently before bringing her middle and pointer fingers together around each nipple, squeezing as she rolled back and forth. Kathryn shivered, sighing again loudly as her head fell back. She struggled between letting go and wanting to watch everything Seven did to her, afraid to miss anything, wanting to remember every single touch even as her mind began to blur with pleasure.

Seven bent down, taking one breast almost fully into her mouth, before tracing her tongue around the nipple, dragging her teeth back and forth against the tightly wound nub. Kathryn felt herself tightening between her thighs, needing to hold on to Seven's waist, afraid she was hurting her with how tightly she grabbed, but the blonde continued licking and sucking, back and forth, between both breasts as if it were the only thing she had ever wanted to do.

"Seven," Kathryn finally breathed, trying to speak words that made sense. "Let me...please...I need to..."

Seven slowly sat up, face flushed and lips incredibly wet from her work on the Admiral's breasts. Kathryn felt like she might black out at just how powerfully erotic the image was, at how freely, openly sexual the blonde presented herself.

Keeping one hand on Kathryn's stomach, Seven reached behind her own back, unclasping her black lace bra, which immediately fell away from her body, straps sliding down her arms, before unclasping her necklace and tossing that as well. She only let go of Kathryn for a second to shake the garment off, leaving her topless as she continued straddling the older woman. She looked down at herself for a moment before returning her gaze to Kathryn, who appeared breathless as she stared at Seven's naked breasts for the first time.

Kathryn ran her mind back through the numerous times she had forced her attention away from them, back on Voyager, any time they were alone together in her ready room, or worse, her quarters, wrapped up in some heated argument or even just casual conversation, cursing herself every time her resolve failed and she found her eyes drift back momentarily. Now, she took them in shamelessly. They were large but somehow so incredibly delicate, nipples softly pink and pointed as Seven breathed down at her, bringing herself to hover just above her face. From this angle, Kathryn could see straight down Seven's body, past her tight stomach as well as several scars and implants buried beneath her skin, to the hem of her underwear.

She swallowed, raising one knee to make contact with the woman's pelvis, to which Seven spread her legs further, grinding down against her thigh as she allowed Kathryn to bring one of her taut nipples between her lips. Kathryn used her hands to bring the breast as far into her mouth as possible, allowing the soft, swollen flesh to fill her up while she breathed steadily through her nose. Copying Seven's motion with her tongue, she licked and nibbled as the blonde rode her leg gently, her hair falling all around Kathryn's face.

"Unnh," Seven moaned as she continued to thrust herself against Kathryn's thigh, dazed between both sensations, finally pulling back.

"What are you…" Kathryn tried to ask.

"Please," Seven shivered, moving down the length of Kathryn's body. "Allow me to do this."

She kissed the older woman's soft belly, careful not to tickle her too terribly much. Kathryn sighed, trying not to tense her muscles, nervous out of her skull at the prospect of what she knew the blonde was after. Kissing her way down Kathryn's milky flesh, stopping just above her pantyline, Seven teased the spot repeatedly with her tongue.

The blonde looked up at her, hair cascading down her shoulders as she gazed soothingly, pleasingly yet patiently, waiting for Kathryn to show her she was ready.

Finally, the Admiral took a deep breath, smiled softly, and nodded yes.

Seven continued licking along the line of her undergarments as she looped her fingers through the cotton strings just at Kathryn's hips. The Admiral's breath caught, and she closed her eyes as Seven pulled the fabric down her legs, past her ankles, and threw it behind them. The silence was so profound, Kathryn could only compare it to being lost in a void in space, no matter, no sound, no nothing. She opened her eyes, only to find Seven looking at her in a way she was sure she had never been looked at before.

The blonde's smile turning into a more devious smirk, she began gently tracing her fingers through the soft, grayish brown triangle of curls, and Kathryn really did start to feel lost. Her head went back as Seven's fingers pressed more deeply into her flesh. She felt herself being opened, separated by the younger woman's long fingers, kissing her thighs, her mound, everywhere but the place she needed it most. Finally, she felt Seven push her thighs apart a little more firmly, and Kathryn complied with the gentle demand, spreading her legs as she sighed.

"Are you…"

"Yes," Kathryn spoke quickly. "Please."

The next thing she knew, Seven's hot mouth was on her like warm, slowly dripping water. She grabbed at either side of the sofa, gripping the fabric as the blonde kissed her there intently, feeling like she was being worshipped.

"Oh god," Kathryn breathed. "Oh…"

Seven proceeded to dart her tongue out against the folds, clearly flooded with expectancy, waiting to be parted as Seven licked through them once, twice, dipping inside the Admiral.

Kathryn shook, thrusting herself further against the woman's mouth, almost on autopilot. Seven sucked the soft flesh into her mouth, making noises all the while that Kathryn was sure she'd imagined but never really expected to hear. She trailed her tongue upwards, finding the Admiral's pulsing, throbbing clitoris, thrashing against it with a speed Kathryn could only assume was the result of Borg efficiency combined with the passionate and truly sensitive nature she had found Seven had developed, no doubt driving her desire to please.

She licked hard and fast before easing off, barely flicking the increasingly engorged nub, to which Kathryn moaned loudly, losing her breath all together, arching her back, before all too quickly, she came.

"Ahhh," Kathryn sighed sharply, gently pushing at Seven's shoulders. "That's…"

Seven finally stopped, looking up at the Admiral, the bottom half of her face thoroughly drenched, her eyes glowing as she glared up at Kathryn, clearly pleased with her work.

"Are you finished?"

Kathryn could only nod yes.

Seven's lips curled as she slowly slid back up the Admiral's body, resting against her, sweat sticking their bodies together as she wrapped an arm across her waist.

Kathryn continued panting as she stared at the ceiling, the realization that _Seven of Nine_ had just made love to her making her feel equal parts thankful and insane.

"I wasn't... intending…for you to top me first," Kathryn sighed heavily, still catching her breath. "But...as always...you managed to persuade me."

Seven looked down at her, brow furrowed as Kathryn smirked playfully.

"I believed, as you were nervous, I should take the lead," she offered. "Was that not…"

"No, no," Kathryn assured quickly. "It was perfect. Just...wonderful."

She reached up and stroked the blonde's cheek. Seven blushed, pushing her hair behind her ear again, her ocular implant sparkling as it reflected the light from the San Francisco skyline.

"You were wonderful as well," she breathed.

"Really?" Kathryn swallowed.

Seven's brow rose again as she slowly trailed her fingers back to Kathryn's mound, cupping it gently. Kathryn's eyelids fluttered shut as her breath caught, terrified and thrilled that the blonde might try again, but mostly relieved as she slid her hand back up to her face, leaning in close, wrapping her legs around her fully.

"You taste," Seven breathed. "Exactly as I imagined."

Kathryn swallowed harder.

"I assume that's a good thing."

Seven smirked before kissing her again.

Kathryn felt a surge of confidence rush through her. Taking advantage, she flipped them so Seven's back was pressed against the arm of the sofa and she was on top. As she pinned her there, her eyes feasted on the blonde, who watched Kathryn encouragingly.

"Do not feel the need to reciprocate immediately," Seven insisted. "I would prefer you enjoy…"

She lost her breath completely as Kathryn kissed her hard, bringing her hands to Seven's cheeks, begging her lips open again before falling further, melting fully against her deeply eager, wickedly willing tongue.

"Do you have any idea how long I've waited for this?" Kathryn sighed, smiling softly as she pulled back.

Seven swallowed.

"I believe I may have an idea," she smirked.

Janeway continued to trace the sides of her face, stopping to play with a tendril that had fallen perfectly against her left cheek.

"Do you remember," she began slowly. "When you thought I'd conspired against the crew, and you escaped with the Delta Flyer?"

Seven rolled her eyes.

"My cortical processor malfunctioned," she sighed. "It was an embarrassing mistake."

"Despite that," Kathryn shook her head. "Do you remember... how I talked you into staying?"

Seven's cheeks flushed.

"Of course," she swallowed again.

Kathryn leaned her forehead against the younger woman's, resting her fingertips against her lower lip.

"That was the closest I ever came to kissing you," she whispered.

Seven reached up and held Kathryn's face, both of them exploring every centimeter, every bone and pore, immersed in texture as they looked and felt with all the intensity forged by years of waiting.

"Your pheromones," Seven whispered back. "It was one of the first times I felt truly human. Beyond a cerebral level of understanding…I was...stimulated."

Kathryn kissed her again, plunging harder, sucking in her breath as much as her lips, wanting to feel as connected as she possibly could to make up for ever having let her go.

"There's so much to say…" she breathed. "So much...I've never wanted to pour myself into another person as much as I want…"

Seven pulled them together, kissing more frantically, grasping the Admiral's hands again, moving them down her neck to her body. Kathryn gasped at the sudden realization of how pressed their bodies were, caressing the sides of Seven's breasts before traveling lower, tracing hip bones.

"Please…"

Kathryn buried her face in the blonde's hair, finding her ear.

"How can I…"

"Show me," Seven shivered, digging her nails gently into the Admiral's back. "I am ready."

Kathryn swallowed, taking a deep breath as she reached between them. Seven lifted her hips readily, allowing the Admiral to slide her underwear down her legs, kicking them off when they reached her feet.

Keeping her eyes locked on Seven's, Kathryn shifted her body off to the side so she could have better access to the blonde. She allowed her gaze to fall over Seven's glisteningly wet, trembling body, stopping just past her navel, to the somehow sweetly nestled patch of blonde, short hair between decadently shivering thighs.

Growing impatient, Seven grabbed Kathryn's hand and slid it easily down her torso, letting go just before her mound, looking up at the Admiral with a playful yet urgent expression. Kathryn glared back haughtily.

Finally, she sighed as she brought her fingers to the soft hair, running her fingers through it as Seven's lips parted and her head fell back. Kathryn trailed down lower as Seven spread her legs, cupping her there, squeezing gently, allowing them to acclimate to the new level of intimacy, though they were both clearly ready.

Going on instinct, reacting the the sounds and movements Seven made, Kathryn slipped her fingers through folds that were almost obscenely wet, slippery and sticky. It was everything the Admiral has fantasized Seven would feel like and more, so undeniably human, and yet, something about her still felt more than human, more than any woman or being she could have possibly imagined touching like this.

"How does that…"

"More…" Seven gasped. "Please…"

Kathryn searched through the blonde's labia, learning as she went, marveling at each dip, at the intensely warm sensation as Seven's body writhed in slow, rhythmic waves. At last, Kathryn found the small, pulsing mound she has been searching for, and as she fingered it softly, Seven's legs spread further, pelvis rising to meet the Admiral's touch.

"Unnnghh," she moaned, head moving back and forth against the sofa.

Kathryn continued to rub as she leaned back closer to Seven's face, kissing her neck, then her jaw, before placing a gentle kiss against her lips.

"Is that…"

"Please…" the blonde whispered with increasingly labored breath. "I need you...inside…"

Kathryn swallowed again as she looked back down at her hand between the blonde's legs. Slowly, she slipped her fingers down lower, until she found herself able to press further, deeper, until suddenly they were surrounded by a heat she had only experienced within herself. As she pushed inside, Seven's walls clenched around her fingers, and as Janeway gently curled against the smooth angles and ridges within, Seven rose up on her elbows, gripping the older woman's shoulders, pulling Kathryn's arm even deeper as she held her tightly.

"Oh my…" Kathryn gasped as she continued to move within the blonde.

"Yes," Seven huffed, allowing Kathryn to fill her up. "Ah…"

The Admiral pushed another finger inside, and then another, before slowly moving the four digits in and out, to which the blonde shook with certain approval. Her arms wrapped around Kathryn's shoulders, she thrusted as the Admiral impaled her faster, harder.

"More?" Kathryn asked breathily.

Seven nodded against her shoulder, and Kathryn continued pumping, unable to fully comprehend just how she was able to make the blonde's body move like this, to somehow feel like she was reaching into the depths of who she was as she plummeted further within.

"Anhhh..." Seven barely made sense as her head fell further back, breasts bouncing as she rode Kathryn's hand as hard as she could.

"Yes," Kathryn breathed against her neck, kissing her there repeatedly as she thrusted and curled her fingers until finally she felt the blonde tighten around her to the point she could no longer move inside her, shaking so hard, arms so tightly wrapped, until the moans grew louder, sharper, and finally, with a deep gasp, she came.

The Admiral stayed inside for several seconds, allowing Seven to catch her breath, before slowly removing her fingers and falling against her side.

Kathryn marveled at how limp Seven's limbs went. Her mind continued to spin at the extremes of emotion she had just witnessed. She had never seen Seven so incredibly open, vulnerable and yet still clearly in control as she gave herself over, and now, lying back, eyes closed as she breathed, steadying herself, so completely, totally at ease.

"Are you alright?" Kathryn finally spoke very softly.

"Yes," Seven whispered heavily, pulling Kathryn tighter. "Thank you."

"_Thank you_," the Admiral swallowed. "There aren't even words for..."

Out of her mind with gratitude, she continued to lie against Seven's shoulder, stroking her blonde, soft waves.

"If you are still unsure regarding your abilities," Seven sighed. "I can assure you...your technique is beyond acceptable."

Kathryn smiled, burying herself deeper into the blonde's hair.

"That has to be the best compliment I've ever received for my efforts," she laughed. "Come to think of it, I'm sure it's the only one."

Seven raised an eyebrow.

"Your former lovers must have been fools," she scoffed.

Janeway continued to chuckle.

"Somehow I always knew you'd be the jealous type."

"Jealousy is irrelevant," Seven insisted. "I simply cannot believe anyone who would not praise you for your sexual prowess would be more than ignorant."

Kathryn rubbed her arm, continually turned on by Seven's loyalty.

"Thankfully, they were fool enough to let me go," she whispered. "Otherwise, we wouldn't be here now."

Seven rolled onto her side, facing the Admiral, hair gently mussed. The light from the window illuminated the rise and fall of her naked form. Kathryn ran her hand from the woman's shoulder, down to the curve of her hip, still shocked that she was permitted to touch the ex-drone so intimately.

"You must get tired of people telling you how beautiful you are," Kathryn swallowed.

"No," Seven smirked. "Feel free to tell me as often as you like."

"Good," Kathryn smiled back as she breathed. "Because I can't imagine anyone sexier. It's astonishing."

Seven blushed, despite her approval, proving she had picked up some modesty in her development.

"Are you hungry?" Kathryn asked, a bit embarrassed, though she could feel her stomach growling.

"I would be interested in taking a sonic shower before dinner," Seven admitted.

Kathryn's eyebrows rose as a brilliant thought crossed her mind.

"I think I have an even better idea," she smirked. "Follow me."


	16. Chapter 16

**CHAPTER SIXTEEN**

After replicating two plush, white robes for each of them, Kathryn led Seven into the pristinely black and titanium bathroom. Rummaging through a drawer near the vanity, she pulled out a lighter and used it on various candles placed throughout the room on ledges, window panes, and around the rim of a one of a kind claw foot, spa bathtub built into the far wall next to the sonic shower, which looked like it had not been used in ages given the piles of books that sat upon the tiles.

"You have always had a penchant for the 'old-fashioned,'" Seven mused, pulling her robe tighter as she peered into the tub.

Kathryn put the lighter down on the counter before joining the blonde.

"What do you say?" she smirked.

Seven took a deep breath.

"I have never taken a bath," she replied hesitantly.

"Really?" Kathryn marveled. "It's one of my favorite things. I even had one installed on Voyager."

Seven rolled her eyes.

"An inefficient use of resources."

"Oh no," Kathryn shook her head. "Trust me. We wouldn't have gotten through half the battles we did if I hadn't been able to recharge my batteries in one of these."

The Admiral moved to the faucet, turning it on and testing the temperature, allowing the structure to fill up as Seven continued to look on. Kathryn peered over her shoulder and suddenly noticed how unsure the ex-Borg looked, just as she had when making her first speech or trying her first bite of Neelix's leola root stew.

"What's wrong?" she asked. "Is this too much? We don't have to…"

"No," Seven sighed, trying her best to smile as she reached out to Kathryn's hand, squeezing it before gently rubbing her thumb against the older woman's palm. "I just...have not spent much time immersed in water. I believe I may have fallen into a lake as a child, before I was assimilated. It is a fear that has resurfaced, though not fully, as I have worked to recover more of my human memories."

"I'm sorry," Kathryn swallowed. "I had no idea. Really, we don't have to..."

"No," Seven repeated. "I would prefer to face my fear in this capacity, especially with someone who makes me feel...safe."

Kathryn took a deep breath as she brought Seven's hand to her lips. She hadn't considered there still might be any "firsts" left for them to share.

"Alright," she whispered. "If you're sure."

Seven nodded yes.

Kathryn shut off the faucet, going back to the sink to retrieve the lavender oil she liked. When she turned around, she watched Seven drop the robe from her shoulders before hanging it on a nearby hook. Once again, her breath ceased as she ate up the sight of the unveiled woman before her, eyes falling to the voluptuous globes of Seven's ass, barely hidden all those years by the tight catsuits she'd worn to help with dermal regeneration. Staring at her stark-naked, however, was a whole other story, every inch of skin revealed, delicately alabaster, marked by the history of her torment at the hands of the Borg, and yet so undeniably resilient.

As she approached, she removed her robe as well, swallowing down her continued reservations about her own body, before slowly reaching out and tracing the blonde's spine. Seven did not flinch. She simply looked back over her shoulder, smirking with eyes that smoldered blue, any fear she may have been feeling clearly overshadowed by her desire to be touched. As she reached behind her, pulling the Admiral's arms around her waist, she allowed Kathryn to embrace her as they both looked down into the warm, waiting pool.

Seven trembled again slightly, exhaling as she leaned back, feeling the smaller woman's breasts pressed against her.

"Are you ready?"

She nodded, allowing Kathryn to let go and come around to her side, taking her hand as they both stepped over the ledge. The temperature perfect, Kathryn slowly lowered herself down into the water, leaning back against the marble, keeping hold of Seven's hand as she lowered herself as well. Kathryn's breath caught again as Seven landed between her legs, back pressed up against her chest, allowing the warm, gentle waves to wash over them, stopping just above their breasts.

Kathryn sighed deeply as she laid back, unable to think, unable to speak, taking in the sensation of the water coating her skin and the soft, equally pleasing pressure of Seven's body against hers.

"How does it feel?" Kathryn whispered, running her hands down Seven's arms, scooping warm water over her shoulders before smoothing her palms against her again.

"Better than expected," Seven breathed, letting go a little more. "I believe I could get used to this."

The words hit Kathryn hard, threatening to fill a void she had allowed to remain empty for far too long.

_So could I_, she thought.

After sitting together silently for what felt like an adequate amount of time for Seven to adjust, Kathryn gently pushed her body forward, reaching for the soap she kept on the ledge, lathering her hands before gently massaging the blonde's shoulders. Seven rolled her neck approvingly.

"Your hands...have always been strong," Seven whispered. "The pressure is incredibly pleasing."

"Good," Kathryn smiled against her ear, before lathering up again, this time bringing her hands to the front of Seven's body, running them down over her breasts, barely able to hold them as fingers slipped past nipples, still wildly aroused. Seven's breath caught at the sensation. She continued to tease her as she ran the soap over her torso, between her legs, down the length of thighs and knees just barely peeking out from beneath the surface.

"Have you given more thought to Starfleet's offer to relocate?" Kathryn felt compelled to ask.

Seven continued to shift slightly, undulating against Kathryn's body ever so subtly as she continued stroking every inch of skin.

"Are you deliberately asking while my judgement is impaired?" Seven mused.

Kathryn laughed softly against the back of her neck, the soft hairs at the nape soaked by sudsy water.

"No," she sighed. "But now that you mention it."

Seven leaned back a bit further, allowing her head to rest firmly against Kathryn's shoulder.

"I believe it is not so much a matter of 'if' as 'when,'" the blonde continued. "I am committed to the success of the program. No doubt, it will require me to be present for the drones at all hours during the initial phase of their re-entry."

"Of course," Kathryn breathed, taking the opportunity to wash herself, though her mind was entrenched in their conversation. "Which means they'll want you living on site."

"Yes," Seven swallowed. "Though I plan to make clear my need for...flexibility...when it comes to my personal time."

Kathryn sighed heavily, the reality of the situation finally sinking in, in ways that were both wonderful and worrisome.

"You do realize," she began slowly. "Even if you were to spend a few nights a week here, people will begin to take notice."

Seven sat up, adjusting herself so she could face Kathryn, keeping their bodies as entwined as possible.

"Are you concerned with people knowing we are romantically involved?"

Kathryn couldn't help but smirk at the technicality of Seven's language, even as the undeniable acknowledgement of their relationship began to take shape.

"Yes and no," she admitted. "Do I think people will be surprised to learn we're together? Absolutely. No matter how normalized same-sex relations have become, I think people will always be fascinated, curious, when it comes to sex itself."

Seven continued to look amused.

"Perhaps they will not assume we are having sex," she offered. "You could be providing continued mentorship as I take the lead with Starfleet."

Kathryn glared playfully.

"Something tells me they'll jump to the right conclusions," she smirked. "Regardless, you know the media will come up with some story. Whether the details are correct won't matter."

Seven sighed, clearly annoyed with the truth.

"I know neither of us are keen about our privacy being infringed upon," Kathryn continued. "But from my perspective...I don't really care what anyone thinks. At this point, I've given enough of myself to society, to Starfleet, to be able to live the rest of my life exactly as I choose. All I care about is your ability to function in your new role with as much ease and distinction as possible. And I think, regardless of what anyone may write about us, you've earned that respect, not to mention the right to live your own life as you see fit."

Seven began to smile again as she reached for Kathryn's hand beneath the surface, lacing their fingers as she moved closer.

"Are you saying you will not deny our involvement if asked?"

Kathryn took a deep breath, reaching up and stroking Seven's cheek as she leaned close to her face, stopping just short of her lips.

"All I'm saying," she whispered. "Is that I'm not ashamed. I'm happy to let you take the lead, but as far as I'm concerned... this is all I've ever wanted. So whatever you decide...I'm game."

Seven closed the space between them, letting the water circle around their bodies as she leaned forward, kissing her Admiral again and again, letting any worry about the future slip away as they became lost, once more, in the now.


	17. Epilogue

**EPILOGUE**

_Two months later._

The mission went better than anyone could have expected, though there were several surprises along the way. It only took a few days for the incredible team of Starfleet engineers, with invaluable support from Seven and her colleagues, to construct a drone that allowed Seven, as a hologram, to board the cubes remotely, along with a device similar to a rover. Working together, they were able to manually perform the steps necessary to retrieve the data, disable the shields, and transport the drones to a facility back on Earth.

Fortunately, it was discovered that the cubes were indeed abandoned by the Borg due to their affliction with the same disease Admiral Janeway unleashed among them twenty years prior. It had spread quickly, wreaking havoc on the Collective, destroying the consistency of the hive mind, sending cubes in all directions without any clear indication of strategy. It was still unknown just how they made it to the Alpha Quadrant, but from what they could tell, a wormhole or other space-folding anomaly was far more likely than any deliberate action.

Plagued by disease, sadly, many drones did not survive. Approximately two hundred were left, having dismantled and used the parts of others that had been deactivated or disabled in order to continue thriving. After transporting the surviving drones to a large structure on Starfleet premises, similar to that of a cube, Seven reconstructed a hive-like communication with them, sharing the message that they were not alone, and that they would be instructed and supported as they continued to adapt. It was a vigorous and emotional process, but one that provided Seven with a sense of accomplishment aiding her journey to accepting and moving on from her past once and for all.

Pleased with her contributions to the success of the mission, Starfleet asked Admiral Janeway once again to be involved in overseeing the project from their side, working with Seven to ensure the transition of the drones went smoothly. However, while Kathryn was indeed impressed by the project, she chose not to take an official role. Instead, she continued working as a consultant, offering herself as a sounding board along with any other needed support to Seven during their time alone, which became increasingly frequent. So far the media hadn't taken much notice, only noting the two seemed to have finally patched things up. Kathryn continued to rely on Lira's discretion, which proved itself over time as the Cadet's path crossed with Seven's in the lobby of the Admiral's building several times a week.

After the hubub of winter holidays died down and January approached, the two found themselves traveling back to Boston. Kathryn sat with their bags in South Station, a necessary stop on the way to the Cape, as Seven inquired in a nearby office about booking an earlier return trip. Given the Doctor appeared to be in better spirits these days, they were hoping he had changed his mind, though they couldn't yet be sure. With any luck, they'd share an evening with him, catching up and perhaps sharing their own personal developments, before heading home and getting back to business.

"Of all the places to run into you."

Kathryn's heart jumped into her throat at the sound of a familiar voice. Slowly, she looked up.

"Chakotay," she swallowed, rising to her feet. "How are you?"

The two hugged awkwardly.

"Well, thank you. Finally returning to civilization after a few years in Ecuador doing research."

"So I heard," Kathryn nodded. "I hope the expedition proved to be fruitful."

"I think so," he mused. "It was good to take some time away, get back to my roots in field study, gain a little perspective. What about you? What brings you to Boston?"

"On my way to visit an old friend," she told him, unwilling to give more details.

"I see," he smiled.

"And you?" she continued. "Where are you headed now?"

"Back to New Mexico," he sighed. "Actually, I'm hoping to reconnect with an old friend as well."

Kathryn's nausea returned with full force. She did everything in her power not to falter as she held the man's gaze, nodding slowly.

"That sounds...nice," she told him, strained.

"I hope so," he smiled a little more mischievously.

Kathryn bit the inside of her lip to keep from punching him in the face.

Taking a deep breath, she looked over the Commander's shoulder and saw Seven stalking back towards them. She locked eyes with the blonde, sending her a half-panicked glare. Seven's cheeks turned a bit pink when she spotted Chakotay, though she did not stop walking. Janeway felt like everything turned to slow motion as the blonde reached them, standing close to her while facing her ex.

"Chakotay," she smiled mildly.

"Seven," he almost stumbled. "I...how are you?"

"Very well," she smirked. "And yourself?"

"I…" he continued bewilderedly. "Well, I was just...hoping to see you, actually, now that I'm back, but...apparently you have other plans."

He looked back and forth between the women, trying to piece things together.

"I've relocated to San Francisco," Seven shared. "I am managing a program there with Starfleet's assistance."

"Really?" he raised an eyebrow. "That's a bit shocking, coming from you. I thought you and Starfleet…"

"I have reconsidered my position," she told him flatly. "As you are aware, some things are apt to change."

"Yes," he nodded slowly. "While others...tend to stay the same."

He continued to watch Kathryn's reactions, though she did her best not to budge.

"I was able to arrange the return trip," Seven finally turned towards the Admiral.

"Good," Kathryn swallowed. "That's settled then."

The three of them spent another few moments in silence.

"Well, I'd better get going," he told them. "It was good to see you."

"Likewise," Kathryn smiled as best she could.

"Be well," Seven spoke genuinely.

"You too," he whispered before picking up his bag and making his way towards the transporters.

Once he was out of earshot, Kathryn let out a deep breath.

"Let's hope Joe has whiskey," she sighed.

Seven smirked as the two made their way out of the building toward the platform to Chatham.

After materializing on the dock facing the beautiful blue house that had in many ways brought them back together, Kathryn turned to Seven, whose face suddenly was overcome with extreme apprehension given the uncertainty of what was to follow.

"Listen," she breathed, grabbing the blonde's hand. "No matter what happens, we're on the same page."

After discussing the dilemma from a distance, they'd both concluded that it was unfair to prevent the Doc from making the decision himself, no matter how hard it was.

"Should he still wish to proceed," Seven whispered. "I will relinquish my reservations."

Squeezing her hand once more before letting go, Seven lead them up to the porch. To their surprise, there was a note hanging on the front door that read "Please come in."

Seven looked back at Kathryn before entering the code and stepping inside.

The house was silent, and from what they could tell, empty.

"This is odd," Kathryn shook her head as they entered the kitchen.

Noting the pad sitting on the counter, Seven picked it up and read aloud.

"Please proceed to the comm screen and press play."

Kathryn rolled her eyes.

After dropping their bags, they crossed into the living room and followed the instructions. The Doc's face immediately appeared on screen.

"Forgive me ladies," the recording began as a very excited, cheerful looking Doctor greeted them. "I hoped to be able to catch you before you left San Francisco, but was unsuccessful. As it turns out, I've been asked to perform at a concert this evening in Prague. Prague, of all places! Can you imagine? Given my involvement with the Boston Symphony Orchestra for the past few months, they've invited me to join them in their latest string of European engagements! I feel absolutely terrible about breaking our plans, and I know you've no doubt left behind important work to keep your promise, but I can assure you there's nothing to worry about."

Seven sighed even as her ears turned red. Kathryn couldn't help but snort.

"As soon as I return, I hope we can set up another date to celebrate. You have no idea how thankful I am, to both of you. It's clear to me now that I have many more years left within me, and although I continue to miss Jennifer every day, I know she would want me to continue on. At least for now."

Kathryn grabbed Seven's hand again, thankful they wouldn't be suffering through another battle any time soon.

"Believe it or not, Martin is arriving shortly. He was able to take leave, so he'll be here for the concert. I must go, but feel free to stay as long as you wish. All my love to both of you."

He smiled warmly before the communication ended.

Kathryn continued to shake her head as she laughed under her breath. Seven stared blankly ahead, marveling at the almost unbelievable turn of events.

"Well," Kathryn finally breathed. "Shall we order dinner?"

Seven sighed, letting go of the tension in her shoulders, knowing she should be thankful instead of angry.

"Do you believe the local fisherman will deliver in this weather?"

Kathryn raised an eyebrow.

"You actually _want _oysters?"

Seven smirked.

"Given the circumstances, I believe we have earned them."

Kathryn chuckled before following Seven into the kitchen.

"Come on," the Admiral scoffed as she sipped from her glass of Jameson, holding her full stomach as she spun around on her stool. "You knew exactly what you were doing."

"I resent the insinuation," Seven glared, though she couldn't help but smile as she placed the leftovers in the cooler.

"You mean to tell me you had no intention of passing out on me that night?" Kathryn said, pointing to the living room where said incident occurred.

"As I believe I made clear," Seven took her seat again. "I have always prefered to sleep alone."

"Really?" Kathryn mused. "You haven't kicked me out of bed yet."

Seven rolled her eyes, taking a sip from her own glass.

"Sleeping with you has proven to be...a more suitable experience."

Kathryn crossed her legs, leaning close, placing a hand on Seven's knee.

"You like the way I spoon," she whispered. "Don't you?"

Seven blushed, looking away.

"Your choice of terminology is ridiculous."

"It's true," Kathryn continued egging her. "Suffice it to say, I'm not the only one who's transparent."

Seven glared as she crossed her own legs, letting her heels drop to the floor. Slowly, she began tracing her toes against Kathryn's shin.

"Are you suggesting I become more subtle?"

Kathryn put her glass on the counter, bringing both hands to Seven's shoulders.

"Not for a second," she smirked, kissing her hard.

Minutes later, the two found themselves on the infamous living room sofa. Kathryn somehow managed to keep most of her clothes on, while Seven had been stripped from the waist down.

"We never seem to make it to the bedroom," Kathryn panted, hovering above the blonde, tracing her nails down her legs.

Seven began unbuttoning the Admiral's shirt as she smiled up at her softly.

"Thankfully," she breathed. " We have many years to explore other rooms of the house."

Kathryn pulled back before Seven could remove her top.

"Oh no," she whispered sensually, eyeing Seven as she positioned herself between her legs. "That's not how this is going to happen. Not tonight."

Seven arched an eyebrow, though she lost her breath as Kathryn grabbed at her thighs, pulling her closer.

"Unless," the Admiral continued to breathe. "You have some serious objection?"

Seven shook her head slowly, laying back. Kathryn leaned down, wasting no time before burying her face between the blonde's legs. She parted her slippery wet lips with her tongue, entering her, tasting the sweet earthiness mixed with a slightly metallic, but not at all unpleasant, flavor. Driving her tongue in and out of Seven's core, Kathryn kept her fingertips firmly planted against her ass, cupping her from behind as she continued to lick furiously.

"Uggnhh," Seven writhed, tossing her head against the arm of the coach as Kathryn devoured her.

"You are..." Kathryn murmured between licks. "Delicious."

Moments later, the blonde reached down and dug her nails into the Admiral's shoulders as she came.

Kathryn sighed deeply, finally coming up for air.

"I could do that for hours," she panted, bringing herself to lay against Seven's chest.

"You have...enhanced your abilities...exponentially," Seven panted.

"I'm a quick study," Kathryn sighed, kissing the blonde's cheek, then her lips. "Though you make it easy."

Seven arched an eyebrow, breathing sharply through her nose, gently pushing Kathryn back down against the sofa before pinning her wrists. The Admiral swallowed.

"You have had your way," Seven smirked, licking the side of Kathryn's face, catching the sweat that dripped from her forehead, whispering in her ear. "Now, it is my turn."

"Can't argue with that," Kathryn breathed, trembling slightly as Seven trailed her kisses down her neck, nibbling along the way.

The blonde expertly removed Kathryn's blouse, followed by her pants, before pulling off her underwear and straddling her. Keeping her eyes locked on the Admiral's, she carefully brought her fingers to the hot, soft space between her thighs, just barely grazing fingers through hair and skin, sticky with want, already throbbing as she waited for Seven to engage.

"I'm... so..." Kathryn shook, wrapping her arms around the blonde's neck. "In love with you."

Seven smiled down at her warmly, finally slipping inside the older woman, to which Kathryn arched her back.

As Seven slid in and out, Kathryn responded by moving her hips forward, back, any direction necessary to feel the full extent of the blonde filling her up. Seven curled her digits deeper, finding the spot she knew would send Kathryn's limbs flailing, helping her to lose control.

"Please," Kathryn whispered against Seven's lips. "More…"

Seven continued thrusting harder, faster inside, to which Kathryn responded by letting go of her shoulders, grabbing on to the cushions of the couch instead. She felt herself clenching tighter around Seven's hand, and slowly, losing the ability to move anything but her lips as she began to climax.

"Aaaaaangh!" she moaned loudly, thankful once again that the Doc didn't have any neighbors.

Coming down from her high, Kathryn's body went lax under Seven's weight, the blonde wrapping herself around her, keeping them warm and connected. The two laid together for some time, their breath aligning, hearts beating together as they took in the silence, relishing the chance to retreat from their busy lives even for just one night.

"I love you, "Seven spoke deeply in Kathryn's ear, kissing her lobe, her cheek, before burying her face once again in her neck.

Before retiring for the evening, knowing they needed to be out the door early to get back to San Francisco, the two put their coats back on, shuffling out to the back porch, down the steps, and into the sand, looking up at the gloriousness of the full moon as it shined down on the beach.

Kathryn lifted her glass with one hand, wrapping the other arm around Seven's waist.

"To the Doctor," she toasted. "May he continue to follow his dreams, including those that involve the unwavering, albeit sometimes unnerving, support of his friends."

They each took a sip.

Seven turned towards Kathryn, pulling her closer, nuzzling her ear while raising her glass.

"And to those friends," she swallowed. "Whom, no matter the circumstances, have always managed to find their way home."

Kathryn smiled broadly before taking another sip. She pulled Seven in for one more long, breathtaking kiss, before they headed back into the house.


End file.
